Anderperry fixit-ish fanfic
Todd woke choking on a breath that wouldn’t come.
His whole body jolted upright, hands clutching at his chest like he could force his lungs to work. Air finally rushed in, sharp and uneven, but it didn’t help. Nothing helped. His eyes burned, tears already slipping down his face before he could even understand why.
Neil’s voice cut through the darkness, softer than usual—careful.
Because if he spoke, it might become real.
The floorboards creaked. Slow footsteps. Closer.
“Todd… hey.” The mattress dipped beside him. A hand touched his shoulder, warm, solid. Real. “Talk to me. What’s wrong?”
Todd shook his head, pressing his hands hard over his eyes like he could erase the images still burned into them.
“I—” His voice came out broken. “I had a nightmare.”
Neil shifted closer immediately, arms wrapping around him without hesitation, pulling him in like it was instinct. “You’re alright,” he murmured. “It’s okay. I’ve got you.”
Todd let out a shaky breath against his chest, but it hitched halfway through, turning into a quiet sob.
“What was it about?” Neil asked gently, fingers threading through Todd’s hair, slower now, more careful.
He didn’t want to say it.
But it was already there, sitting between them.
“It was you,” he whispered.
Neil stilled, just for a second.
“Your father was sending you away,” he continued, the words tumbling out faster now, like if he didn’t say them all at once they’d suffocate him. “And you—you said you couldn’t do it anymore and—”
His voice broke completely.
“I couldn’t stop it,” he choked. “I tried, Neil, I tried but I couldn’t—”
He buried his face in Neil’s shirt, gripping it tightly, like he was afraid it would disappear in his hands.
“And then everything just fell apart,” Todd went on, barely able to get the words out. “Everyone was fighting, and Mr. Keating was being fired, and it was like—like none of it ever mattered.”
Not empty silence—heavy silence.
The kind that lingers too long.
Then Neil pulled him closer. Tighter.
“Hey,” he said softly, but his voice wasn’t as steady as before. “Hey, look at me.”
Neil’s face was right there. Close. Real. Alive.
“It wasn’t real,” Neil said quietly. “You hear me? None of that happened.”
Todd searched his face, like he needed proof.
“But it felt real,” Todd whispered. “It felt like… like it already did.”
Neil swallowed, something flickering across his expression before he smoothed it away.
“I’m right here,” he said instead, firmer now. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Todd’s grip tightened. “You don’t know that.”
The words slipped out before he could stop them.
“…I do,” he said, but softer this time. Not as certain.
“Promise me,” Todd said, voice small, desperate in a way he didn’t try to hide. “Please, Neil. Just—promise me.”
Neil looked at him for a long moment.
Then he reached up, brushing the tears from Todd’s cheek with his thumb.
“Yeah,” he said quietly. “I promise.”
But he didn’t look away from Todd when he said it.
And there was something in his eyes—something Todd didn’t understand, something that made his chest hurt all over again.
Neil laid him back down anyway, pulling the blankets up, lying beside him and wrapping his arms around him like he always did.
Like he was trying to memorize it.
Todd pressed closer, listening to Neil’s heartbeat, grounding himself in it, even as a strange, lingering fear refused to leave his chest.
Outside, snow fell softly against the window, silent and endless.
And eventually, Todd’s breathing slowed.
But even as he drifted back to sleep, his grip on Neil never loosened.
And long after Todd was asleep—
Holding him just a little tighter.
