1 you know you’re fucked when you have an entire dream revolving around holding his hand. and by holding his hand i mean palm hugs. i mean fingers building steeples together, opening doors you never even knew existed. i mean your head line disappearing into his heart line. i mean, you’re fucked. 2 how do you love someone who is always, but never, just about to leave? every time you look over your shoulder he is always turning the corner. every time you scratch your ghost town heart off the map he turns it gas station. you take your last gallon of fuel and give it to him. don’t tell him it’s the last. keep waiting for him to come back round that corner. 3 one night he will tell you about this girl, because there’s always a girl, and she is beautiful. i mean, the kind of beautiful you can’t even hate, and believe me, you’re going to try. all your friends are going to try but the fact is she is yellowstone and you are botanic gardens. i mean, sure, you have flowers, but no one’s gonna stay there for more than half a day. he is not staying with you. you are the gas station girl, the rest stop he sleeps in on the way to his coda city slow dance. you are nothing but fuel. 4 how do you love someone who is always, but never, just about to leave? you sit on a ledge and argue with your heart for hours. when is a boy not just a boy? when you won’t stop dreaming of his hands. when your heart thinks he’s the sky. 5 you know you’re fucked when you have an entire poem revolving around holding his hand. and by holding his hand i mean not really. i mean you are never sitting in that passenger seat. i mean, close those doors. even the ones you thought existed. even the ones that felt real. i mean, there are no more corners left to turn. i know you’re fucked, but stop looking.
“Gas Station Girl”, by ironedout