I am a cisgender female.
I can get married to whoever I want, as long as they are a male. So, in order to fully understand my boundaries set before me apparently by an all knowing god, I must first ask questions.
If I fell in love with a boy who dressed like a girl and looked so convincingly like a girl that people assumed he was female, could I still legally marry him?
What if he changed his pronouns to she/her/her. Then could I marry him?
At what point does he stop being a male (regardless of what he is biologically)?
Is it how he dresses? Is it how he talks? Is it the pronouns he uses?
At what point does this powerful being say I cannot marry him?
Let’s say I had a girlfriend who dressed like a boy.
Let’s say she looked like a boy and used the pronouns he/his/him.
Let’s say that his gender was often - maybe always - assumed to be male.
Let’s say that only his family, close friends and doctors knew he was biologically a female.
Then could I marry him?
We would be husband and wife, not wife and wife.
Do either of those scenarios pass the standards for the all powerful ruler?
What if I fell in love with someone who didn’t identify as any gender.
They use the pronouns they/theirs/them.
People misgender them all the time as male or female.
The general public does not and will never know what gender they biologically are.
Could I marry them?
Or what if I fell in love with someone who switched genders.
One day they use she/her/her, wear dresses and makeup, and for all intents and purposes is a girl.
But the next day they use he/his/him, wear pants and have short hair, and for all intents and purposes is a boy.
Let’s say you never found out their biological gender.
Could I marry them no matter what gender they currently were?
Or could I only marry them when they were currently a boy?
At what point do we decide what gender people are?
I guess you could say that it is based on their biological gender.
So, tell me, that man you sat next to on the train? When did you get the chance to ask him what he had in his pants? Or your hairdresser, the girliest girl you know, when did she tell you what reproductive organ she has?
The answer is never.
You do not find out the majority of people’s biological genders ever.
Never, ever, never, ever.
And yet, you still decide what gender they are.
Based off of what? Well, isn’t it obvious?
You base your assumptions of people’s genders off of what they wear, what their hair is like, the way they talk, their names, and other pointless things.
You compare what you observe about a person to the social standards set before you.
Did you ever think you could be so shallow?
I strongly dislike wearing skirts and dresses. I avoid it at all costs, and I wear pants all the time, even to dress up occasions.
What if there was a boy who strongly disliked wearing pants. He avoids it at all costs, and wears skirts and dresses all the time, even to dress up occasions.
Why is it socially acceptable for me to wear pants, but it isn’t acceptable for him to wear a dress?
And did we switch genders by switching stereotype clothing?
No?
So switching what clothes we wear doesn’t switch our genders?
What if he had long hair and I had short hair?
Now did we switch?
Still no?
What if he wore make up and I didn’t?
Still no?
What if we switched pronouns?
At what point do we switch?
At what point to people mix up our genders or misgender us?
At what point can he marry a girl or a boy?
At what point can I marry a girl or a boy?
At what point do you want to quickly label us as something you understand like cross-dressers or transgender?
If you cannot answer every last one of these questions, then you should think.
What really is your position on equal marriage rights?
What do you really think of transgender people?
What do you really expect from the people around you?
And what do you unrealistically expect of yourself?