Sep 5, 2025
So anyway, Lovely Assistaff cracking because Zanka's insecurities, self-doubt, self-hatred, self-worth get the best and worst of him? Sign me TF up!!
If you haven't read Hemlock, I recommend you do, it's so awfully sweet!! And also, so awfully heart-breaking! (I did NOT read the tags and walked blind lmao. So it ending where it did was... Gah, I was killed on the spot, I say, I say!)
#Zanka Nijiku#Gachiakuta#art:digital#art:mixed#sketch#the wonky lines for the hand/staff couple ones was provided by my non-dominant hand.#Trying to get a reference from my right so I used my left. Ended up concluding what the hell why would i clean that and just doubled down#That Zanka whump brainstorming will FOREVER live in my heart. cherishing that ish. tattoing it in my skin. Zanka whump my beloved I wish hi#to be wrung like a towel so bad. But also. I wish him the best i swear.#This came about from the brainstorming and the WIP screenshot that killed me on the spot. Just because the ideas was tossed and said and#written doesn't mean it had to be. like. actually executed. Like. THE FUCK. MY HEART!!! STILL WOUNDED!!! STILL HAUNTED!!!#It does not help that part it's my lockscreen at all lmao. Forever perpetuating the cycle of pain ey#Anyway don't mind the smudges. I sketched that shit fast on receipt paper. and y'all needn't know where I'm scrounging that from.#Somebody please put him through the wringer. i need him suffering. but i also need him so loved so cared for <333#Anywhoooooo.#Vital Instruments being a reflection of their Givers and Lovely Assistaff breaking because Zanka's soul is so strained#Ayup. sign me!! the fuck!! up!! GAHHHH!!!#wjgmk the worn down we see and the bandages we see aughh#forever thinking of the idea of. Zanka HATING Lovely Assistaff when it first manifested#Like. Downright loathing the sight of it. Because that's a. that's a reflection of his weakness. of how dependent he is of it#Right Hand Staff my beloved I think that's right too but. What if. You know. Because Zanka knows. Being a Giver. Being a Cleaner. big no-no#and then turns out he's lost it enough that he's become a Giver and just. Ohhhh. MMMM. chewing on that.#Anyway my WIPs are killing me and I'm at a lost!! TMI but I... uhhh#feel like i'm burning out hahah. Or I'm indecisive. Or. idk. There's just so many ideas to keep up. And for every old one I work on. three#new ones pop up. like. aghh. accck. I need more time off work so i can keep up. oh well. back to the scheduled weekend doubles#i'm just itching to write so bad man... feel like i haven't but like. realistically. i've been. like. objectively. but i feel like... gahhh