#archivist here

[therealestheadarchivist]

I learned Nikola Orsinov has a soda brand named NiCola or NikoCola or something like that, and I'm truly disturbed because it apparently tastes great, but the only ingredients are water and... NotWater.

[therealestheadarchivist]

I unlocked a whole new level of tired.

I took a ten minute nap on the ground in one of the empty hallways, using some files as a pillow.

[therealestheadarchivist]

Archivist here. You know what, Elias has done a bunch of horrible things. But, thankfully I've found a list of things he'll probably never do.

1. He's never gonna give you up (lie)

2. He's never gonna let you down (double lie)

3. He's never gonna run around (maybe right. He makes others do that)

4. And desert you (triple lie)

5. He's never gonna make you cry (.. he has. Plenty)

6. He's never gonna say goodbye (well..)

7. He's never gonna tell a lie (LIE)

8. And hurt you (he does. All the time)

[therealestheadarchivist]

Archivist here How likely is it for Elias to find out I got a Trojan and possibly a handful of viruses on an Institute computer? [Please lie and reassure me that he somehow won't]

[therealestheadarchivist]

'Body horror'? Yeah, of course having a body is horror. Especially the living ones. Have you seen one of those things?

[therealestheadarchivist]

[The Archivist is sitting on the floor of his office bawling his eyes out]

[therealestheadarchivist]

Archivist here.

I have a large supply of grilled cheese and trauma. Does anyone want either?

[therealestheadarchivist]

[The Archivist has learned that having an open, bleeding wound in his leg for over twelve hours isn't healthy and normal, actually]