I'd love to hear your commentary on "Shatter"!
Shatter was a commission I did for @rhiorhino based on : Where are the senshi now and how are they coping with being broken? ANd I laughed when I got it, but I knew it would probably be MaS, and I knew that it would be a really good opportunity to do stuff in the very beginning of MaS, which I hadn’t really played around with as much, i’d only done it in Pop.
I knew from the beginning I wanted to close with Usagi, and so I sort of worked my way back from there.
Mako was hard for me because I don’t write her very much, but I knew I wanted to bring gardening and flower imagery into it, something she’d always loved, and make it mocking, make it something that has been taken away from her, if only for the moment (Mako grows up to get married and have a bakery and twins and a huge garden she’ll be fine) and I was always really pleased with the way that worked in this
What would she even yell at them for, if she could, if her voice could carry as the scent of rose and honeysuckle? For daring to grow, and daring to bloom, and daring to be something she loved that was still alive, out of all the things she had loved, that had been the one blooming and smiling and
But flowers grow from death and decay, don’t they? That has always been true, you know that, Mako. You are a rose of perfect beauty, grown in the rich fertilizer of your loss.
I’ve thought about that a lot, how it’s the decay of other things that makes flowers grow, and how that’s applied to so much of Mako’s life, and so I was really delighted to have a chance to use that imagery.
For Mina, I really wanted to focus on the guilt of the situation–Mina really struggles in this AU with the fallout longest of all, emotionally, and it’s a solid decade before she manages to work her way through the pain of it, and I wanted to really work with that sense of things. That, as leader, she should have been hurt. She should have suffered. She’s taken so much pride in her skill before, but now it all seems so hollow.
One thing i OFTEN like to dig into is the idea that having been chosen to be a Senshi is not necessarily the most positive thing on earth, and I really am proud when I can go there in small symbolic ways like this:
She snorted to herself and crossed her arms across her chest, the gold band hitting against the inside of her arm and pinching tight.
I love those tiny moments, I think they tend to serve things the best.
With Rei I got to play a lot with Seeing and seeing, and how right now she can really do neither. She’s still bandaged, and her powers are gone (I always have her and Michiru both keep tiny tiny slivers of them: Rei knows when the phone is about to ring, for example) and it was kind of a gift to Jetty to have Rei blinded in battle and continue to fight that thing like a complete badass. I think I like this spot the least, though.
Usagi’s I really liked. I don’t ALWAYS research my fics, but for this part I went down a really bizarre hole about Japanese vending machines. I don;t know, I’m a complete weirdo, and so then I used it for the idea that it was something Usagi would memorize, and sort of assign to each of her Senshi, and I think that actually worked really well as something Usagi would know and pay attention to.
It was my plan for a long long long time in MaS to have Michiru essentially decline to speak with Usagi for a pretty lengthy period of time. To hand in a very formal resignation, and it’s really only after Rei and Mina marry that Michiru even thinks about being a bit kinder to her, about being generous with her, but by that point Haruka is happy and they have their first daughter and so she feels far more charitable. But in the beginning, she’s just furious in her Michiru way. And she rejects Usagi, over and over.
What I liked about playing with Usagi is this idea that she’s no longer the princess and so she no longer rules, she no longer has full reign over her power, and her healing is gone, she’s only Usagi now, and how does that work with a girl who’s used to getting her way in these matters?
So much of Usagi’s life goes awry when it all ends: I actually have her marry Mamoru shortly after this because she wants SOMETHING good to happen, and they’re destined and they love each other, right? But Usagi suffers, and then she learns and I promise she ends up just as happy as everyone else.
Thank you so much for sending this!