ARVI OS: I LOVE YOU, ALWAYS HAVE, ALWAYS WILL.
Arjun and Purvi were happily married for over a year now. They finally got married after all the problems in their life. Ovi accepted that Arjun did not love her but Purvi. Everybody had accepted Arjun and Purvi’s marriage. Yet, there was something missing.
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Purvi was pregnant within six months of her marriage and she was positively glowing. She had everything a girl could ask for. A husband who adored her and doted on her, a loving father-in-law, her mother’s happiness (Archana had been accepted by the Deshmukhs) and now she was on the way to motherhood.
The day Purvi came to know she was pregnant was one of the best moments for her. She was on top of the world. She had been feeling quite unwell the past week or so. Vomitting and exhaustion was constant. On seeing no improvement in spite of resting continuously, she decided to visit the doctor.
Now, she had to inform her darling husband that they were going to become parents. The feeling of excitement was one she could not describe. She was nervous and happy at the same time as she did not know how to give him the good news.
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Arjun came home in the evening, tired from work. The work load was too much and pressure was no less. He was also very concerned for Purvi. She had not been keeping well for the past week. He went to their room hoping to see her resting; however, she was not there.
“Purvi. Purvi, where are you?” He called out.
“I am here Arjun. In the kitchen.” He heard her voice.
Uff! His wife! She would never listen to anything he would say. He went to her deciding that today he was going to tell her off for not taking care of herself and her innocent looks and tearing eyes would have no effect on him.
“Purvi, what are you doing in the kitchen? You have to be resting right now. You have been unwell for the past week, yet you are in the kitchen making Kheer! Why don’t you take care of yourself? I already have so much pressure in the office and here at home you do not take care of yourself. How am I going to manage work if I know you are unwell? Did you go to the doctor today? I should have gone with you to make sure you follow all his instructions. Wait, let me call him up and find out what is the matter.” He spoke continuously without listening to her or even looking at her.
“Why are you laughing now?” Arjun asked as he looked up from his phone in which he was dialling the doctors’ number. He had expected her to be crying but it was quite the opposite.
Purvi was laughing seeing Arjun’s reaction. He was such a darling. She remembered his unsuccessful attempts at telling her off earlier. He would melt down seeing her innocent expression or her tears. She noticed that while getting upset at her this time, he looked everywhere but her face. She felt bad for him. He was really overworking himself at the office especially since the past few days so that she could rest at home. And she was touched. She went to him, to reveal the news.
“Arjun...” She took the phone from him and put it on the counter.
He looked at her questioningly, “Ok, listen to me. No interrupting me, please.” She looked at him for confirmation, “If you interrupt me, I will go away from here and not talk to you. Okay?” He nodded hesitantly.
“I went to the doctor today. And yes I wish you had come, but I totally understand that you could not, so do not worry too much about it. The doctor gave me some pills and a dietary chart. I... I....” She could not tell him. Arjun urged her to continue. She went closer to his ears and whispered, “I am pregnant, honey.”
Arjun was surprised. He could not believe it. He pulled Purvi in to a tight hug, muttering thank yous in her ear. When they broke apart, he pulled her in a kissed her on her forehead and thanking her for being there in his life as she brought in happiness with her.
Purvi was constantly smiling and embraced him when she saw his eyes brighter than normal. They were both so happy, learning that a baby; the sign of their love was going to come soon in their lives. Their life was changing and for the better. They were nervous about being parents but had confidence and trust in each other.
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The next six months were a whirlwind. Purvi’s mood swings, her cravings, the kick of the baby, thinking of the names of the baby was all that happened in their life and mattered the most to them. Of course the sex of the baby was another important topic between them, which they never seemed to agree upon. Arjun wanted a girl, his princess while Purvi wanted a son, her ladla beta. Many dreams were woven for the future of the baby; the sex did not matter then. The baby seemed to have brought Arjun and Purvi closer over the last six months. Arjun used to spend a lot of time at home instead of the office as it used to get tiring waking up in the middle of the night to fulfil Purvi’s cravings.
One such night, Purvi woke up craving for dark chocolate icecream.
“Arjun,” She woke her husband up. “Ice cream, dark chocolate, please?” She made an innocent face with a small smile.
“Ok, love. I will get some for you.”
“Can I come with you?”
“No. It is too late. You stay here and nap, I will be back soon.”
“Let me come please. We can go for a long drive as well.”
Arjun finally agreed on Purvi’s insistence. They got dressed in warm clothes and drove off.
Purvi was really happy on getting her ice cream and had it like a child. On their way back, Arjun was looking at Purvi while driving, making sure she is comfortable. They were having another of their tiffs regarding the baby.
All of a sudden, “ARJUN!” Purvi screamed at him turning the staring wheel of the car. There was a car coming from the opposite side of the road in full speed. The driver seemed drunk as he was over the speed limit. Their car swerved and got hit by the other car before it rolled over.
“ARGH!” was the last thing Arjun recalled hearing before he passed out.
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When Arjun gained consciousness a few hours later, the first thought in his mind was Purvi. What happened to her? Where was she? The last thing he remembered was her scream. He called out to the nurse standing near him and asked for Purvi.
The nurse told him that she is in the next room and she is still unconscious.
As Arjun was leaving to go see his wife, the nurse spoke up, “you have lost your child, Sir.”
Arjun was shocked. He had lost his baby, their baby. It dawned to him that it was all his fault. Had he been paying attention on the driving rather than Purvi, the accident would not have taken place, nor would they have lost their unborn child. He started crying profusely. He needed Purvi. But what if she blamed him for the accident and the death of the baby? What would he do then? No! He could not face her.
After a while, Arjun decided to go see Purvi. She was lying still on the bed. Never had he seen her this pale. He held her hand carefully and embraced her body while weeping and muttering “I am sorry.” He considered himself to be responsible for everything. If he had been more careful. If only he had not allowed her to come. If only.
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When Purvi woke up, she was alone in the room. She recalled what happened and tears rolled her cheeks. She had a feeling whatever happened was very bad. She hoped her baby was fine; anything happening to herself was ok, as long as her baby was fine.
She screamed a cry of pain when she felt her stomach. The nurse and some family members came running in. “My baby! What happened to my baby?!”
No one could tell the young woman the tragic news. No one had the courage.
Purvi was wondering why no one was answering her. In the midst of all the familiar faces, she missed that of her husband’s. Where was he? Why was he not with her? She got hysterical on receiving no reply.
“Where is my baby? Why is no one answering me?”
Not being able to see her this way, Archana went to her and hugged her daughter and revealed the truth. Purvi broke down in loud sobs. She was uncontrollable. Seeing her in this condition, the doctor and nurses decided to inject her so that she would fall asleep. As too much stress was not good for her.
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When Purvi awoke a few hours later, she noticed that Arjun was nowhere near her. She needed him, his support. He was her strength. Why would he go away from her at this crucial point in their lives. All of a sudden, she realised that he might consider her responsible for the loss of the baby. If she had not insisted on going with him to get the ice cream, the accident would not have happened. Tears welled up in her eyes and she let them flow freely. She felt guilty. Guilty for killing her baby, even thought she did not do it intentionally, she caused it to happen.
Little did she know how much her husband; the love of her life was fighting himself to run and hug her. He thought she would consider him responsible for the loss of the innocent being. Little did she know that he spent the whole time next to her while she was sleeping, holding her hand firmly. Little did she know that the same man was standing right outside her room shedding silent tears. Little did she know that the doctor had informed him that she may never be able to conceive again. The report from the doctors shattered him and what was worse was he thought she blamed him or will blame him at some point in time.
Little did they both know, that instead of considering themselves responsible, they had to face the situation together, fight it together, supporting each other.
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A few days passed since that fateful day that changed their life. Purvi came to know that she may never be able to conceive again. She was devastated. Her beautiful married life had come to a dark path. She knew her condition may lead to the end of her marriage and that broke her even more.
In spite of living under the same roof, they were like strangers, not talking to one another at all, barely even seeing each other. Each was wallowing in the grief and guilt separately. The elders of the family had no idea of what was happening as the couple pretended that they were there for each other.
How they longed to be there for the other, support one another was clearly evident in their small actions. Arjun would stay by Purvi’s side when she was asleep, holding her hand, begging for her forgiveness and Purvi would talk to Arjun’s photo crying to him, apologising furiously. If only they would have talked to each other, they would have been able to deal with the situation better and stronger.
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They had had enough. A few days of spending apart, not talking to each other was extremely frustrating for them. They missed talking to the other, holding each other, hugging each other. They missed each other’s support which was what they needed the most at the moment. They were mourning yet separately. They were together yet apart. And they decided something needed to be done about the situation. The baby was bringing them closer, then how could they drift apart after its loss? They needed each other the most at this point.
Both of them decided to confront each other. There was no other way the problem could be sorted. Arjun walked to their bedroom, while Purvi was leaving it when they almost bumped inn to each other. They looked at each other and in to their eyes and all they could see were their own emotions reflecting in the other pair of eyes.
“Arj...”
“Purvi..”
They both spoke up at the same time.
“I am...”
“Sorry?”
Arjun ended up completing what Purvi started to say. That was all she needed before she embraced him in a tight hug and started crying. He held her tightly and sobbed along with her. This was what they needed after the pain they were enduring. Both apologised to each other for what they felt they had done wrong. They both felt really guilty for the loss of the child.
After a while, Arjun and Purvi were sitting at the foot of the bed, holding each other’s hands tightly, with Arjun’s arm around Purvi’s shoulder who was leaning on Arjun, hugging. She was crying silently. When Arjun realised this, he held her tighter asking her what was wrong. He turned her around so that he could face her.
“Love, tell me what is wrong? You know nah I cannot bear to see you this way.”
“Arjun, Arjun I may never be able to become a mother again.” She sobbed. “I lost my baby, our baby and now I may never have the chance to give birth to our baby, the sign of our love.”
It killed Arjun seeing her this way. She had been bearing all this pain all alone for all this while just because he was scared to talk to her? It killed him to know that they may never be able to become parents; that the sign of their love may never come in to the world. It mattered to him. He had wanted children, always had, ever since he fell for this stunning woman. But she mattered more. Her support did. Her love did. And he had to convince her that she mattered the most to him. Because if he knew her well enough, she would be having insecurities and doubts regarding their relationship and she would ask him to leave her. But he could never do that. He loved her too much to let go of her.
Purvi’s state of mind was frantic. She was going crazy with worry. She may never be able to become a mother; however, Arjun could become a father. Why should she let him suffer because of her state? Placing a stone on her heart, with great courage, she turned to look at him and say the next few words that she had never thought she would ever say.
“Get married again Arjun.”
It was like a slap on his face. He knew she would say it, he had expected it; he knew her too well to not predict something like this. But this soon? The woman sitting in front of him had grown. She was no longer the crazy, cute, sharp witted and his fighter Purvi. This woman was somebody else. She had a firm look on her face although her eyes spoke something else. He could only imagine how she must have said those words to him. He cupped her face and gazed in to her eyes before saying,
“No! I can never do that Purvi! I LOVE YOU! I know why you are doing this! But I am sorry, I will never do this! I am responsible for this. If only I had been more careful while driving. If only I had refused to let you come along with me.” She shook her head refusing him to go further. She did not blame him at all for what happened. And she did not want him to feel guilty for it.
“No Arjun, it is not your fault....”
“If it is not my fault, then it is not yours either Purvi. Purvi, I understand, love. I know how much you are hurting right now. I know how much you wanted to have this baby, our baby. I will not get married to someone just so that I can get children. Yes, I wanted children, but I wanted them with you. Purvi, if this has happened to us, God must have planned something better for us, love. He will give us the strength to bear it and to fight it. Ok?”
He enveloped her in to a tight hug, stroking her back so that she could release all the pent-up emotions.
“We will go to the best doctors and get you treated. The doctor said that you may not be able to conceive, means we have chances. We will get the best treatment. And if, God forbid, it does not work, then there are so many children in the world who are without parents. We will adopt a child. And give him the life we would have given our baby. Ok? There is always a way out, love. Always.”
Purvi looked at her husband and gave him a small smile. It really meant a lot to her. His support. She had yearned for it since the day she had woken up at the hospital. He gave her the strength to fight against the worst situations. She thanked the Almighty for blessing her with such a husband.
“I love you,” She whispered.
“I love you too. Always have, always will.” He said before kissing her on the forehead and wiping away her tears.
THE END
Hope you guys like it:):)