#arschbiene

[sketchytea]

something warm after a grueling day; it's not easy being a single father in the fifth-century 🤗🔥

thank you so much @arschbiene for commissioning me! this was such a pleasure and honour to make :>

[still-intrepid]

For the ask meme: Nyo Lithuania #8 lying and #25 Crying

eeehee thank you for my nyo liets!

8. what sort of lies do they tell?

Deliberate ones, like if she’s got something planned that needs a cover story she’ll think it out and be pretty consistent.

Also, though, at the same time, weirdly: lies to avoid hurting people’s feelings, to avoid confrontation--which she cannot GET about herself, why do this?  but sometimes does (and it sometimes distresses herself, she feels as if she’s being pushed around by stronger personalities--and it’s not even always intentional...)

25. crying

She has, or has had, a biiit of an instinctive, or at least a habitual, tendency to associate crying with weakness, or a cheap shot for sympathy.  Not that she’d ever say that to anyone (that she liked)!!  She’d try to help.  Awkwardly.  and nowadays she does understand that’s not really how it works.

So she herself doesn’t cry a lot, and is rather definite about that.  Means when she does it’s because she’s absolutely bottled things up til they explode, and it’s not good.  she’ll still try to be quiet though, tending to near silent over breathing;;

[cirqueangelique]

dedicated to @arschbiene / @assbu for her recent birthday 🎂🍑🐝🎇🍰🍯🎉!!!!!!

[ask-fraustria]

Tell me about our children /dangles my leg in the air seductively

MORE HEADCANON, this time about my OTP which is Pru/Aus but specifically in this instance Prussia/nyo!Austria! also NSFW.

romantic;

she seems to like stealing his athleisure loungewear stuff so much that he buys her her own. tanks, tshirts and lounge pants with cute stuff like ‘princess’ and cupcakes on it. that he then borrows back.

she has a habit of stopping by jewellers and bridal shops and bakeries and…etc, looking at the wedding gear, when they’re out and about, and it makes him sweat. is she doing it deliberately?

she bleeds his wallet dry for presents. she doesn’t think of it as shallow or golddigging at all, it’s what she’s used to and she considers it a sign of love and affection…he agrees, he loves to show off with flashy gifts and he’s terrible with money because of it.

because he’s an affectionate person who craves touch, she too is a lot more affectionate with him. she invites herself to sit in his lap when she feels like it- usually by ordering him to sit properly to accommodate her.

her favourite thing about him, physically, is either his very pretty eyelashes or his muscular back. she touches his eyelashes, eyebrows and hair a lot when they cuddle, he has unnaturally soft hair.

she suspects his favourite thing about her is her butt…but it’s probably her eyes or her lips. privately, though, she absolutely loves the attention and appreciation he gives her figure.

the combination of her very prim and proper clothing and her elaborate, old-fashioned lingerie isn’t deliberately meant to inflame anyone’s passions, but it does things to Prussia. he has rather gentle tastes in sexy outfits and likes old-school pinups. throughout history he was often floored by her very richly-attired beauty, but nowadays he likes that subtle retro look.

even though she’s a much better cook and takes care of dinner most of the time (if they have it at her house), she likes to prod him for breakfast in bed just because. (then, complain about it.)

she can’t sext…he keeps trying, but…she doesn’t understand the point…she takes him very literally and turns it into a complete trainwreck. on the other hand, old-fashioned phone sex goes a bit better because she has such a lovely voice.

she…has a bit more…drive than him. she can wear him out. but then she is making him do most of the work. and her body is more…you know. it can go longer. she likes to try and recapture the energy they had when they were younger…

they like roleplay…they’re very silly. they play Housewife and Gardener or Secretary and Handyman and other stupid things. all over the house. and sometimes away from it.

i think she prefers to experiment sexually with him over anyone else. she’s more willing, more often, to be submissive or try something out. on some level, she trusts him more in bed than other partners. ironic.

being separated on a daily basis during the cold war era (they did have some visitation probably) made her really fall in love with him, i think. at that point most of their former glory and horribleness was behind them, and being left alone with her thoughts made her realise how she’d grown used to him being with her and how she wanted him back.

since they’ve only been together like this since the 90s- with everything prior to that being a bumpy ride to say the least- they feel new and interesting to each other even now.

they’ve shaped each other, influenced and challenged and defined each other, for better and worse, but with a pretty good end result. they know each other too deeply for there to be any…pettiness? about their relationship now. they bicker all the time, but when your last bad breakup involved a war, a deeply personal one at that, it’s unlikely anything less than that is going to shake anything up. since he’s retired and she’s settled down, they’re quite relaxed.

general;

they like to play chess but rarely, because they’re not good sports about it. they’re fairly evenly matched but Austria tends to win a little more…Prussia has a bad habit of flipping the board when he’s in a tight spot and she taunts him… when they were young, it ended in bears ALL THE TIME, they’ve only gotten somewhat better in recent times.

for that matter, if he ever plays a game with her, he tends to deliberately pick something he thinks he’s better at just to be a jackass and/or impress her, which backfires now and then.

if she needs something, she’ll call or text him rather than Germany because she’s learned that while Germany is a busy person, Prussia is a sad fool who never puts his phone down. he’s not always that HELPFUL, but it’s like he can’t physically ignore a text, so she spams him with messages…and they’re either incredibly verbose and proper, or mangled by autocorrect.

he takes a new profile photo of her for his phone every time he sees her, he likes to test the limits of just how photogenic she can be.

he isn’t a big fan of her beloved cat, but i can’t decide whether it hates him or weirdly loves him and rubs up on him all the time and makes him uncomfortable.

they don’t really need to, but they like to correspond via snail mail. even if it’s a petty argument, there’s something satisfying about sending a letter.

they switch off responsibility. when he’s doing something stupid, she’s the first to point it out, but if she’s behaving erratically, he suddenly becomes an adult. neither of them are really responsible at all.

they worry about each other a lot. they each have their own unique and special ways of endangering themselves on a daily basis. more seriously, though, they’ve both been through things that have actually threatened their continued existence, and it’s in those moments that they show more concern than anyone.

[auxanges]

X austria/prussia ✌🏼

X. A flash of anger.

-

Four hundred years of unforgiving summers, of the brush of cloth that isn’t Gilbert’s on his shoulders, of incense and sugary words heavy in closed spaces–they fray the nerves to raw open things. 

Which is why he’s surprised when it’s not him who snaps first. 

“–it’s cowardice,” Gilbert’s saying, pacing the length of the stupid parlour, “it’s you giving up, Rod, don’t you get it?” 

“I fail to see how I’m giving up anything.” Roderich’s on his feet, to, arms crossed over himself, following the other man’s movements behind his glasses. “I do what I have to do to survive.” 

That makes him laugh, brash and ugly; disbelieving. “Fucking your way to the top of the food chain isn’t surviving. You never fuckin’ change, do you?”

“Don’t–”

“Look at yourself. Look at your rotten line, you think that’s even anything worth saving? Open. Your. Eyes.” Gilbert reaches for his glasses, to pluck the stupid things from his face as if it’ll help any. 

Roderich seizes his wrist. 

It makes him hiss, the hard press of a thumb into the bones of his wrist. His pulse races under his skin, hammering like something unholy, and it wouldn’t exactly be the first time he’s been called that, has it?

“Do not,” says Roderich, “presume to know me.”

“Bullshit. I know you better than anyone.”

He twists his grip, and Christ almighty, it’s an iron one, for a man so slight–Gilbert follows through, wriggles in an attempt to get free until he’s relased. 

This, too, is not the first time Roderich’s loosened his hold on him. 

Gilbert rubs his wrist and sneers. “I know you,” he repeats, and there’s a cold burning in Roderich’s eyes, uncovered where Gilbert’s managed to pull them off. There’s no further answer than that, but he doesn’t need one, not when the unspoken words they share are louder.

It’s hot outside. It’s hotter indoors. 

The glasses shatter in his grip with a crunch, and Roderich gives him a sickening sort of smile. 

Not the first time the Austrian’s been called unholy, either. 

[sketchytea]

🐹you're always so friendly, supportive and welcoming!!

augh, thank you 😭💕 so are you!!

[diehellasrache]

arschbiene

replied to your

post

:

death cw[[MOR] because it’s on my mind, here is...

whispers as your resident Inadvertent Professional Corpse Handler taking you extremely seriously: that’s called a natural burial and if you want it done you have to specify it in writing and have it notarized or else whatever funeral home you end up in will never sign off on it and they’ll sloppily guess your religion and give you everything you never wanted done

THANK YOU ASSBY I will look into having this done

[still-intrepid]

Heyy, I'm snooping through your fic for nyopolliet inspo which is making my whole life rn but I just wanted to give you a heads up that your co vu url leads to a lot of broken pages? which makes it difficult to look through your blog and I heard that co vu was giving people ads/viruses or something so it might be worth taking it off your blog

oh no!  so I’ve been finding a lot of posts don’t seem to load through my activity page on mobile but I thought that was on other people’s blogs too.. Maybe that’ actually the fault of the subdomain …   Everything seems to work ok on computer/browser for me - what are some of the links that are breaking?

(The issue about viruses/malware from last year or so was debunked, happily– although that kind of domain probably is using all of us to generate traffic and rankings for them! (I figured not all that much through me and I wouldn’t worry about it, although…))

Ah, dilemma…. The good thing about these is of course they survive through url changes, but then I have literally never changed my url; BUT what I have done is make an awful lot of links in posts which would break if I got rid of it :(    

Anyway thank you for letting me know, I’ll have to have a think about what to do ;;;;; And thank you for reading my things, or trying to!!  Anything I can direct link you to?!