Simon only has one emergency contact, and it's you. The two of you have lived together for five years now, so if anything happened to him, you would need to know. He'd always assumed you would only get a call that he had died in combat, not this.
"Si? Hey, baby... It's me, you're okay." Simon grunts in acknowledgment, heart rate still spiking the monitor beside him. "Hey, eyes on me."
"Did they call you?"
"Well, yeah... That's what an emergency contact is." You tease, taking his hand and giving it a squeeze. "Your captain, he thinks we're dating."
"Are we?" Simon croaks, turning a little in the bed so he could face you. "We live together. Go on trips together. Don't date anyone else. I always choose you when it comes to hanging out with others." He rambles, eyes wandering down to your hand in his.
"You aren't in love with me. And, while I love you, I'm not in love with you." You rub your thumb across his knuckles. "There's also no one else I'd get out of bed for at three in the morning. We don't have to name it. I just know I love you."
Simon squeezes your hand back with a steady smile growing on his face. "I love you too."
Inspired by @rawme-price 's wonderful Ace!Soap post here
Fair warning, this hella got away from me, so It's kinda long, but I might continue it more if people like it
Thinking of an Asexual Reader on the 141 who knows the others have a Thing going on, but they don't seem all that interested in adding you, so you're more than content to sit on the sidelines, just happy to be around them. Eventually, they come out on their own terms and tell you outright that the four of them are together in a relationship, and you just blink and say "oh, okay!" and go on your way.
Nothing really changes after they tell you, but they catch you staring at them more often. At first they're nervous, wondering if you're bigoted or somehow judging them, but you're just as friendly as you always are, so they become curious.
You soak up the rough hair ruffles, the heavy handed pats on your back, the good natured arms slung around your shoulders, but don't go out of your way to initiate contact with them- you don't want to accidentally make someone uncomfortable- just putting in your earbuds when suspicious thumping starts coming from Ghost's room beside yours, or keeping your eyes above the shoulders when Gaz stops by after a shower and forgets to keep his towel clasped. They try all these little ways to tempt you, to try to draw you in, but you just never seem to get the hint!
It comes clear one night after an annoying op, when the five of you are scattered about one of the lounge rooms, sipping at drinks of choice- Price with classic whiskey, Gaz with a beer, Soap with a spiked lemonade, and Ghost with a tea that might not even have booze in it- all of you mindlessly chattering about whatever comes to mind. Ghost has his balaclava off, a rare deal, showing the mass amounts of scar tissue from years of field missions gone wrong, and you can't keep your eyes off of him.
You keep staring, then looking down at the tattered journal in your lap, then staring again, and it reminds him that oh yeah, you haven't seen his bare face yet, have you?
Somehow the topic gets onto preferences in partners- probably Soap's doing- and to no one's surprise, they all pretty much have preferences that align with at least two of their partners' features. They make a game out of it, trying to guess the others' preferences based on their own features, and you're just watching from the sideline, amused as Gaz viciously defends himself against claims of being turned on by soul-sucking blue eyes. At some point Ghost snorts, rolling his eyes as he says Soap must have a thing for ugly mutts that look like roadkill, referring to himself, but you just frown at him.
"You aren't ugly though?" You sound genuinely confused when you say it, and it reminds them that they haven't even tried to grill you about your preferences- it could finally be an in on sniffing out if you had feelings for one or all of them.
"Yeah? Ye into blokes who have that rough and rugged look?" Soap pounces first, prodding the waters, but you just shake your head.
"Oh, I'm not really into anyone.?" You say it like a question, but explain before Soap can start complaining about how that's not a real answer, "I'm ace, so... not the same kind of system you guys have," You shrug. Price raises his eyebrows and sips at his whiskey at the revelation, contemplating, and Gaz looks like several things are clicking into place now, "Wait, but that implies there Is a system" he says, confused.
You frown, waving a hand "Its.. hard to explain. You guys can look at someone and think 'Woah they're hot let's bang', or 'ew they're not my type I'm as dry as the sahara', but for me there really Is no 'hot' or 'ugly'- I mean, of course there's people who are conventionally attractive in an aesthetic sense, but otherwise everyone is just... A Person." You try to get it across as best you can, and it makes Ghost snort.
"You can't seriously be telling me that you think my mean mug is in any way nice to look at," He grunts, but you frown at him again. "Yes, you are!" You state, leaning towards him almost threateningly.
"Your hair is fuzzy like labrador fur and it's the color of wheat in the morning before the sun gets strong, your eyes are dark like reflections in a mug of coffee before the cream but turn to mahogany wood when you're relaxed and the light hits them," You fired off like he had personally offended you, listing feature after feature, "the divot in your lip gives you a snaggletooth look when you smile or smirk, your crooked nose wrinkles when you make a joke and you're waiting for someone to laugh, the scarring on your ears curls them in and gives them an elfish point, the chunk missing from your left hand's nail gives that finger a different tone when you drum them against the table, yo-"
"Jesus, you noticed all that??" Gaz spoke up, eyes wide. You remembered where you were and with whom, and you settled back in your seat, taking a sip from your glass.
"..Yeah, sorry, I got carried away- I know it's creepy," You shrugged, and Soap shook his head, scrambling up off his seat on the floor to plop down next to you.
"Creepy?? Hell naw, that was cute! Sounded like you were turnin' Ghost into some poetry or somethin!" He fired back, slinging an arm over your shoulder so you wouldn't try running.
"..What was that, anyway?" Ghost asked after regaining his words. It felt... Odd, to be described and compared to mundane occurrences without a single mention of his sex appeal or the combat capability of his bulk.
"Sorry, I just- It sounds creepy or self-absorbed, but there's really no 'ugly' to me because I kind of see everyone as characters, if that makes sense? Or art, maybe." You struggled to put it into words, fiddling with the corner of the journal in your lap, "If everyone looks the same- pretty eyes, perfect nose, straight jaw, unblemished skin- then that picture isn't going to look all that interesting, you need different features and elements to make something worth paying attention to.. so I find the whole beauty and attractiveness stuff weird, cause it just doesn't make sense to me, everyone's their own person, their own 'character', and it's not really a 80s American diner if at least One of the waitresses doesn't have a big blowout hairdo and thick mascara on, you know?"
You glanced up to try and gauge their reactions, only for Soap to bowl you over, "I only understood half of that but you're perfect the way you are! I knew you were more of an artist than you let on!" He cried exaggeratedly, trapping you in a bear hug.
"Aye, I don't quite get it, but you aren't creepy for it," Price shook his head, scratching at the bridge of his nose, "if anything it's... Flattering, knowing you see us like that," He sniffed, taking another sip of his drink.
Gaz leaned forward, "wait, so have you been drawing people?" He asked, making Ghost perk up as well, remembering the way you'd been staring at him earlier.
"The ones I find interesting, yeah- is that weird?" You ask, a bit timid about showing your drawings, only for Soap to snatch up the sketchbook.
"What's weird is you're not showin us!!" He laughed, using his bulk to shield the book as you tried to grab it back from him. He opens to a random page
a page filled completely, left to right, of drawings of the 141.
Imagine you’re in an aegosexual relationship with Alastor. You don’t have sex, but you tell each other what you imagine it to be like.
He vividly describes how he fucks you against his desk and enjoys the sounds you make for him whilst he satisfies you, and how that turns him on.
In return, you tell him how you imagine your kinks and how he indulges them in your fantasies.
Then, completely aroused, you each retreat to your own separate rooms, each masturbating while playing out the other’s passionate films in your minds: Alastor lost in yours, and you in his.
Really liked your dick grayson analysis of him as a partner. I keep thinking, how would relationship with him work with an asexual / demisexual partner?
hi nonnie and thankyou so much for reading 💗 !!
i particularly like this question because i made a similar post related to this on a very old blog back in ‘22 i believe, but to sort of attempt to quote it from memory, the bare bones of the post was that maybe an asexual or demisexual partner is exactly what DICK GRAYSON needs.
in the sense that, DICK who can be described as certainly conventionally attractive and has had many sexual encounters in his past, to the point where sex is usually either a precursor to a relationship or a thing he’s had to accept as being the sole reason he’s usually pursued. like, he goes to grocery store and there’s somebody over in the next aisle eyeing him and he just knows they’re sizing him up on the sexual attractiveness scale pre-programmed into their brains — dare i say he makes light of it and jokes around often but i don’t think he really enjoys being objectified all the time lmao. in fact, it’s often very disheartening for him and i think he’s had some issues with how he’s perceived because of it.
that is to say, that if and when DICK ends up with an asexual partner, he has to relearn that way he’s been socialized in relation to sex. it’s refreshing for him, the dates, the handholding, the kissing that leads to nothing more than a hand slipping under his shirt to steal his warmth because you want so much more of him, just not in that way. but as it drags on, he most definitely feels a little offended and a lot worried. less because of you, but moreso because he immediately believes something is wrong with him and that you’re not attracted to him or worse, you’re getting your needs fulfilled elsewhere.
best case scenario is you tell him. he’s an easygoing guy, please just talk to him. however, if you’re at that stage where you’re still figuring it out and don’t exactly know how to approach him, that’s fine too because he is the ceo of mediation and will confront you (kindly). he wants to understand you more than anything.
DICK wants you, in whatever form you come. so if it is that you’re simply not interested in sex, or you’ve had sex before and only consider it as an act of getting closer to someone you’re with, he gets it. i think a part of him might be relieved? in a way? he doesn’t feel that weighty pressure on his shoulders like he needs to perform in the bedroom for you to like him or stay. which, i guess says more about his experience with sex than it does your feelings towards it.
being asexual, demisexual or simply on that spectrum while dating DICK GRAYSON is absent of pressure and full of love. he flirts with you, he teases, and his crude jokes aren’t exactly crude but heated and the tension between you two is evident to everyone.
his fingers still skim your waist and his lips still go from the crook of your neck and down your arms all the way to your fingertips where he makes sure you know his love travels tenderly. he’s always been a lover of the physical, but for a long time he’s forgotten that the physical can be this, the closeness, the act of taking care of you and feeling absolute pleasure from your satisfaction with him and the space you two have created.
Asexual x Consent King x Touch Starved x Hurt/Comfort x Cuddling x Asexual Experimenting x Angst x Romantic x Frotting
(Asexual feels comfortable enough to try sex with their partner as requested by commissioner)
“Oh,” Vere muttered as they rounded the corner. “When did that get there?” They were supposed to be looking for some grocer a friend told them about, a place with amazing plums. Instead, there was a building that looked like a Victorian manor, but with signage and display up. It was a place one would remember seeing in their town. Or at least someone going ‘hey, that old place that looks like a Victorian manor’, but no. This place was entirely new to Vere, no matter how old it looked.
‘Robin’s Nest’ the sign read, antiques and more. On the steps up there were planters filled with overflowing flowers and foliage, small snow globes tucked into them where they could fit. The doors to the shop were wide open, letting in the fall leaves that fluttered in the wind.
“Welcome!” a short, very pale woman said as she was trotting out with a broom. “There’s fresh coffee and snacks right over there! Help yourself, I’ll be right back.” She smiled brightly as she set to work, trying to shoo the fall leaves back outside. She looked like a porcelain doll, and the broom somehow looked too big for her.
The scent of coffee brought Vere back to their senses, as it reminded them of walking into their grandmother’s home. Or well…their grandmother’s home when she was still alive. They stepped over to the table, admiring the spread of cookies and the small glass door fridge, revealing rows of flavored creamers.
“What is this place?” Vere muttered, taking a shortbread cookie.
“Welcome!” Another booming voice scared them and they almost coughed up that first bite of cookie. “Looking for something? I know this place may be huge and daunting, but I can help you find the exact item you’re looking for.”
The man behind the counter was wearing an outfit that matched the woman from before. Uniforms? Or were they just being cute?
Vere covered their mouth with a napkin. “Just looking.” They swallowed hard. “I was actually looking for a grocer. I didn’t know this place existed.”
The man smiled. He, too, was short, had a dark complexion and very curly hair. “That’s often how the best places find you, isn’t it?” He gave them an up and down look that made Vere a touch uncomfortable.
They tugged on the hem of their long tank top. “Umm…sure.”
The man lit up, eyes going wide, while his mouth formed a gasp. “I know you!” He suddenly. “Gloria’s grandkid. Right? Vere.”
It wasn’t just surprise that crackled through their system like electricity. It was also joy. Someone who knew their grandmother?
“Yeah! Yeah! She talked about you a lot. She said you’d eventually inherit her place one day. So how do you like the decor? Gloria bought a thing or two from me back in the day!” He chuckled.
Back in the day? He didn’t look over thirty. Maybe? Vere really couldn’t tell people's ages. He could be twenty or a hundred for all they knew.
“I’m Robin. You know? From the sign?” He chuckled. “Come! Come! I have a piece for you. I think you will love!” He waved me over, walking side by side with me as he led me deeper into the shop.
“Gloria used to love the old books and records.” Robin chuckled. “I bet you had a lot to deal with. I’m so sorry about the loss, by the way.”
“Thanks. Umm…she left me the house, so I have kept everything it was.” Vere felt strange confessing that. They knew at some point they would have to renovate, changing things to suit their taste. But they missed her so much, and they didn’t have many friends around them now.
“If you ever want to sell anything, let me know. I’ll give you a good price. Gloria really knew how to clean me out!” Robin laughed. He stopped right before a display of what looked like a pet shop wall of fish. Which was shocking for an antique store. This was probably the ‘more’ the store sign talked about.
“Gloria got you that fancy blown glass fish here,” he said.
“Holy shit, I was a kid when she got me that,” Vere blurted out. “I mean-” They looked Robin over once more. Vere couldn’t tell people’s ages, but surely this man was an exception.
Robin brought over a stool he stood on and pointed to a fish tank, where there was a single fish inside. It was deep purple and shimmering blue. Perhaps it was a beta fish, but no. It had the same long flowing fins as a beta, but the shape of the body and the eyes were all different.
“I think Malik would be perfect for you.”
“Malik?” Vere was still in shock. But they didn’t have time to process, as Robin was soon sending them out the door with the strange fish in hand.
The aquarium back home was ready, and Robin assured Vere that Malik could share a tank with others. They went through the proper steps to get Malik acclimated, putting him in the aquarium water just before bed.
Vere sighed, watching him sink into the tank and swirl around before hiding in some foliage. They smiled, content to watch the aquarium for hours. Eventually, Vere went over to the sofa, intending to only lay there for a moment. But the longer they watched the fish tank, occasionally catching Malik dancing towards the surface, they fell deep asleep, sinking into that old sofa like that had many times before as a child.
That was until they heard someone walking around. Vere stirred slightly, enough to yawn and pull the blanket more around them. In their mind, their grandmother had gently laid it over them, afraid Vere would get too cold. The kitchen light turned on and Vere rolled over so they faced the back of the sofa. How nice, they thought, to fall asleep and not worry because Grandma would take care of them. How nice.
Wait.
Wait!
Wait!
Vere shot up like a bullet on the couch, looking into the kitchen. Cold sweat began prickled on their skin as someone rummaged around the kitchen. There was a yawn, and the refrigerator door closed. Bit by bit by bit, Vere sat up, moving to run, attack. But they didn’t know exactly what that was! The thought of attacking crossed their mind. Then they thought they should run. But they couldn’t just leave Grandma’s house to be ransacked! Vere would let her down if they did that.
Vere stepped back and hit the coffee table, knocking over the small tray of bells Grandma had. “Why the fuck does she have these?” Vere thought in spite as they tried to dodge them and hide.
“Oh, you’re awake.” A tall figure stood in the kitchen doorway. “You looked cold, so I put a blanket on you.”
Vere grabbed the first thing near them that looked big and heavy. “Stay back!”
The figure turned on the light to the living room, and while their eyes adjusted, they saw blue and purple.
“That tank is just a touch cold. You should get a heater for it once winter hits,” he yawned. A tail twitched behind him as he turned into the kitchen. “Do you want some tea, too?”
Vere froze solid, afraid to move or do anything. Their hand twitched, then they chucked their Grandma’s old bible, which merely hit the wall and fell with a loud clatter against a shelf of more books.
The figure poked his head out of the kitchen door, revealing long hair that was clipped along the sides. “Whoa. Careful there.” He picked up the bible, revealing dark sclera and lavender irises. He held the bible up. “It’s the pen that’s mightier than the sword, you know.”
“Who are you?” Vere blurted out loudly.
The oddly colored man stuck out his forked tongue and smirked with it between his teeth. “Malik, duh.”
The antique shop wasn’t normal. Vere should have known that from the moment they walked in. But something, perhaps that absence of their grandmother, kept them from paying attention. Back in the day, their grandmother often showed them behind the veil, at what lay beyond mortal understanding. The carnival was the first place Vere had gone, where everything made sense to them. Why hadn’t they caught on at the antique store?
“Robin only lets people buy what they need,” Malik explained. “And you needed me.”
It was those words. After much explaining from Malik’s part, they stuck in their mind. Their grandmother said something similar. It was comforting, and it helped Vere calm down and sank into the understanding an incubus now lived in their house.
That was the norm from there on out. Malik was an incubus who lived in the home of someone who considered themselves mostly asexual. Vere decided it was irony. That was all they could come up with.
But it wasn’t at all strange, because after a few days, Vere could see why Robin gave them Malik. It wasn’t unknown to them how lonely they were. It had been months since their grandmother died, and they barely had anyone outside of work they conversed with. An incubus in the house was the perfect solution.
“It’s not all about sex,” Malik explained. “Sure, it’s fun and all. But we go after what we know humans usually want. Intimacy, closeness. We feed off the satisfaction of that desire. Sometimes sex is the easiest way.”
“So you don’t want to fuck me?” Vere asked, adding food to the fish tank.
Malik smirked, raising a cup of piping hot tea. “Only if you want me to.”
“No. I’ve never really cared for that,” they confessed. They set the fish food aside then stood there, half looking at the tank, half looking at Malik. “Have you ever come across that?”
There was a distant look that painted Malik’s face while he thought. “Once, but they were a child.” He smiled up at Vere. “So I don’t think that really counts. Do you?”
Vere was still getting comfortable. At most, they were sitting close to Malik on the sofa, afraid that getting much closer would make Vere uncomfortable.
“No, not really.” Vere huffed. “My grandmother was the only one who really got me. Everyone else thought I was trying to be special.” They rolled their eyes.
“Why try when you are?” Malik replied tenderly. “In my experience, I’ve not met two people who are alike. Everyone has marks on them that vary, have thoughts that vary. They all touch someone differently. Their voices, the way they breathe.” They let out a soft chuckle. “This may sound silly coming from something that is considered a sex demon, but a libido causes more problems than it does anything else. I don’t know why people consider it something wonderful in that regard.”
Vere smiled shyly, turning away from the fish tank to face Malik directly. “Do you say that from experience?”
He had the tea cup tilted to his lips, which he gracefully sat down to answer. “My libido is based on the libido of the person I am with. That is how all of my kind operate. We respond in kindness to what the other needs.”
It was dangerous, but Vere asked. “And what do I need?”
“I can hold you,” Malik said, extending out his arms, wide open, “if you want me to.”
Vere could remember the hugs their grandmother gave them and how long it had been since such an embrace enveloped them. Vere sunk into Malik’s arms, resting against his chest, clutching him for dear life. It almost brought tears to their eyes. No, it brought tears to their eyes.
“Aww, it’s okay,” Malik purred, stroking Vere’s hair. “Wonderful.” He fed from Vere, taking that longing, that need, that had been with them for so long. To Malik, it was pure and sweet, a well-deserved meal. To Vere, it was a relief, letting all that go, seeping into the soul before them.
“See?” The incubus chuckled as they pulled away slightly. He looked into Vere’s weepy eyes, smiling tenderly, lovingly. “Sometimes that is all a body needs.”
After that, it was even easier to understand why Robin left Malik in Vere’s care. Both needed affection, one who desperately wanted to give it, and another who desperately wanted to receive it.
“Honey, I’m home.” Vere grumbled in irritation as they came home, shucking off their shoes and slouching as they walked into the living room.
“What’s that tone?” Malik called from upstairs.
Collapsing onto the sofa, Vere clutched a pillow, hugging it close to their chest and smashing their face into it. “Faah dee-” their voice was muffled by the pillow.
Malik came walking down the stairs with a sigh, sensing the tension around Vere like a thick icing. “I see.” Malik stood before the aquarium, tossing in some fish food. “Was it Marla again?”
Vere kicked their feet furiously.
“I see,” Malik mumbled again, kneeling down to watch his fish friends rush to get to the food. “She is still doing the misgendering bit.”
Vere whined into the pillow, turning into a muffled scream.
“I see.” Malik turned away from the fish tank, wiping his hand against the back of his pajama pants. “Do you want me to torment her? Maybe I can go seduce her father and show her a thing or two.”
Vere was quiet, contemplating such a thing. “No,” they huffed.
Smirking, Malik crossed his arms against his chest. He was playing it off, but his tail twitched behind him from the irritation. “You’re kinder than me.”
“No.” Vere huffed as they rose and tossed the pillow aside. “No one in her family deserves you.”
His smile grew bigger. “See, kindness aplenty.” He went to the sofa, sitting down beside Vere. “Want a cuddle?” He offered, holding his arm at the ready.
Taking the offer, Vere snuggled on Malik’s chest, holding onto him while sinking into his side. They’re new comfort, the place they could go to let the stress wash off them. Malik’s presence was exactly the friendship Vere had been desiring.
Playing with Vere’s hair, Malik sighed. “I’ll do anything for you. Fight, sexually torment, ghost on a dating app.”
Vere snorted.
“Eh, I’m sorry you have a shitty coworker, my friend.” Malik kissed the top of Vere’s head.
“She says it doesn’t make grammatical sense, so she won’t do it.” Vere said in a whiny, high-pitched voice to mock Marla.
Malik faked dry heaving, making Vere giggle. “And no one is doing anything about it? I know the place you work is small, but surely they could get her to work away from you.”
“I dunno,” Vere sighed, snuggling up more to Malik. “Every time I make a complaint, I feel like it fuels her to keep at it.”
“Bitch.” His lip curled, revealing sharp teeth inside.
“I like the job at least.” Vere said this, but neither them nor Malik were at all convinced they were telling the truth.
Hugging Vere closer, Malik kissed the top of their head. “Do you really? Or do you just not want to stress yourself out looking for something else?”
Pressing their lips into a firm line, Vere didn’t want to admit to getting caught. The job, genuinely, was just okay, but Marla was pushing it towards the edge of not okay.
“How about you quit?” Malik clicked his tongue, thinking that was decisive action.
“And what?” Vere sat up. “I don’t have to pay for the house, but I still have to live, Malik! The bills! The groceries-” they quickly gestured to the fish tank. “My fish!” That seemed more important to Vere than groceries. And while the bills were minimal, thanks to grandma, they still existed. But the fish!
Malik had a continued, tranquil smile on his face. “I can pay for all that now.”
Vere’s face hit the floor, jaw agape as he stared at Malik like he was nuts. “I beg your pardon?”
The incubus laughed, turning to fully look Vere in the eye. “I started a Spicy Dish account, and not to brag or anything, but I’ve started making quite a pretty penny.”
“When did you start a Spicy Dish?” Vere was doing the math in their head of how long Malik had been in their care. Had Malik made a following in under a month?
“About a week ago.” Malik’s reply was so nonchalant for it being such a short amount of time.
“And how much do you make in a week?” Vere blurted.
Malik opened their phone and the Spicy Dish app to show Vere. “I make over a thousand a week.”
Shocked silence was all that answered Malik as they proudly showed off their hard gotten gains. His enormous smile, proud, almost matching the seductive one in his avatar.
“You started a week ago?” Vere’s voice came out louder than they intended.
“Oh, like that’s hard to believe. Look at me.” Malik snickered as he took back his phone. “I was devilishly seductive.” He smirked as he looked back at his phone. “I’m also making a killing with personalized videos and chats. So you don’t need to worry if you want to quit your job. You can become my assistant. Hell, I’ll make you my sugar baby if you want,” he said teasingly.
Vere made a face. “Are you sure about that, though?”
Malik’s smug smile turned sympathetic and soft. He reached out, touching Vere’s cheek gently. He smoothed his thumb under Vere’s eye and then through their soft hair, holding them preciously all the while.
“I want to take care of you, body and soul. Is that a foreign concept to you?” Malik’s voice was a deep purr.
Vere’s face flushed bright red. “I mean…a little.” They struggled to keep themself composed with Malik’s touch. It was a touch that stirred something in them.
“I was given to you for a reason,” Malik replied. “And the more I spend time with you, the more I realize my purpose and why Robin placed me in your care.” His smile was so gentle, so soft. “You’re my friend, Vere. Darling and dearest.” He kissed Vere’s forehead. “Maybe more, but that doesn’t matter now. What does matter to me is that, as my friend, I want to help you as much as possible. Which includes getting you away from a bigoted, abusive coworker.” His face was stern then, slightly pouty.
“Is that okay with you?”
Vere swallowed, then placed a kiss on Malik’s cheek. “Okay. But if we’re going to do this, I wouldn’t mind some rules or something set up. I don’t want to take advantage of your kindness.”
Malik wrapped Vere up in his arms. “Nonsense. I know you’d never do such a thing. If anything, I’ll take advantage of spoiling you.”
That caused an anxious yet excited pause in Vere. They smiled, awkwardly a bit, then let out a laugh. They hadn’t been spoiled since their grandmother, and it had been so long they weren’t sure how to embrace it at first.
It was innocuous enough once Vere resigned from work, Malik’s pampering was the occasional dinner, a fancy coffee machine with fancy coffee beans. Then there was the nice new computer setup for Vere, a new bed.
“Let’s go shopping!” Malik announced loudly and excitedly as he burst into the room.
Vere was eating a bowl of cereal, almost choking on a bite as Malik’s explosion of an entrance shocked them.
“A whole new wardrobe for the both of us!” Malik was acting beyond giddy, basically vibrating out of his bunny slippers. “I just got the biggest tip yet!” He almost singing as he spoke.
Vere wiped their mouth off. “How big?”
Malik suddenly went coy and shy. Posing with his arms wrapped around himself and swaying demurely. “Five grand.”
They choked despite not having anything in their mouth. “How?” They stood up from their seat, staring at Malik is awed disbelief.
Malik blew a kiss towards Vere. “Never mind the how,” he giggled a little wickedly. “Enjoy the repercussions with me. It’ll be fun! When’s the last time you got new clothes?”
Christmas, Vere thought, the year before Grandma passed. “Uh-” They were still staring at Malik in disbelief.
“Exactly!” Malik beamed with excitement. “We’re gonna go shopping like it’s a new school year and mama has a sugar daddy.”
Vere didn’t really have much time to process that sentence. They weren’t one for clothes shopping, not at all. Even as a child and being forced to wear what their mom got for them, Vere saw clothes as a trap. They hadn’t found a style that represented them, that expressed how they saw their gender and themself. It was easy to slap on nondescript t-shirts and baggy jeans because everyone wore that. But anything else? What if someone said something? What was allowed?
All eyes were luckily on Malik as they shopped. Even in a human guise, Malik was beyond captivating. Tall, deep olive skin, covered in tattoos, it was no wonder he was growing in popularity on Spicy Dish. Vere caught people staring at Malik, often unaware of their expressions or how they turned so suddenly. It must be an incubus thing, Vere thought. They stood closer to Malik, unaware they wanted people to know he was with them.
“Vere! Vere!” He ran up excitedly, grinning from ear to ear as he showed off Vere a piece of clothing. “This would look so good on you.”
“That’s okay.” Vere said, already taking another long, plain tank from a rack. “I know what I like.”
Malik frowned slightly. “Okay. Sure.” He folded the article of clothing over his arm. “Are you sure that’s all you want?”
“I’ll probably ask for some fancy shoes, don’t worry,” Vere tried to blow it off.
Malik scoffed, pouting as he watched Vere go for the same old, same old. “Well, would you at least indulge me and try this on?” It was a jean jacket, with various color blocking, and big, striped sleeves.
Vere shrugged. “I guess that’s fair.” They took the item of clothing.
“And these.” Malik handed Vere a few more things. “Please?” His big, sappy puppy dog eyes made Vere nod in silent agreement, heading to the dressing room.
Vere began taking off their clothes, stalling when they saw themself in the mirror. They stared for a moment, watching their hand go down their chest then back up. Hurriedly, Vere put on a shirt. The tight black turtleneck showed off their figure. The high collar made their jaw look twice as sharp as normal. They took the top off in a hurry, replacing it with another that was more billowy, slightly sheer.
Vere wasn’t sure who they were looking at each time they put something new on. By the time they reached for the jacket, it was too many people.
“You’ve been in there a while,” Malik said, knocking on the door. “Can I see anything?”
“Wait-” Vere’s voice garbled by how thick their throat had become. The lump inside was unbearable, aching.
“Vere.” Malik’s tone was soft as concern came over him.
Vere gasped for breath. “Wait-”
Malik had somehow opened up the locked changing room door. He flung himself inside, wrapping Vere up in his long, strong-arms. His hand cupped the back of Vere’s head, holding them against his chest where it was warm, safe.
“It’s okay,” he whispered.
The tears had started before then. Vere clutched at Malik, pulling to find shore after this horrible storm washed them away. “I don’t know-”
“Shh, it’s okay.” Malik pet their hair. “You could have told me this made you nervous.”
“I hate clothes,” Vere spat. “I hate shopping!” They could remember being forced into overly starched pants and stiff collared, button up tops. Their hair cut and buzzed close at the ears, making their head cold. Ugly socks. Dreary colors. Shoes so shiny Vere could see themself in them. How they hated those shoes! Matte shoes from then on out! Every kind of hair! Baggy clothes!
“Look at me,” Malik cooed lovingly, holding Vere’s face between his hands. He smiled when Vere’s eyes focused on him, bleary with heavy tears. “I’m sorry. I was just so excited to take you out.” He kissed Vere softly, their lips, cheek, forehead. “Get what you’re comfortable with.”
Sniffling, Vere stepped back to allow Malik to see them in the jean jacket and one of the tops he picked out. “I like this,” they muttered.
Malik smoothed down the front of the shirt, holding Vere’s hips in his palms. “The colors suit you.” He smiled again. “What if we got you a few out of the norm pieces?” He asked. “You can wear them around the house, get used to them, play around, find yourself your own style as you like.”
“You won’t get mad if I don’t wear it?” Vere mumbled.
Malik’s brow pinched deeply. “What? Why would I get mad?”
Vere’s eyes darted away, remembering how every school year they would get yelled at for not wearing the clothes bought for them, and instead wearing the same variation of the same outfit every day.
“I’d be happy to see you in a long t-shirt and boxer shorts every day!” Malik said with his full chest. “Just so long as you were comfortable. You also have good legs, but that’s besides the point!”
Vere sniffled again, smiling softly. “Okay. And thank you.”
Malik cupped their palm against Vere’s cheek again. “Can I kiss you and mean it?”
Vere nodded, closing their eyes as Malik dipped down, pressing his lips firmly to Vere’s. The dressing room grew so warm, Vere was sure their face was bright red.
“My Vere, you’ll be you no matter what you wear. I’ll see you shining through, as beautiful and dashing as the first time I saw you through the glass of my fish tank.” His smile was loving and Vere knew there was no stopping this feeling that was ever growing, ever persistent.
Back at home, Vere was hanging up their new clothes, seeing colors shine through as their wardrobe became more packed. They stepped back, noticing hints of purple and yellow they never would have seen before. There were no shiny shoes, but plenty of comfortable, expensive sneakers to choose from. Vere smiled to themselves, unsure if anything Malik bought would get worn, but happy. He had someone care enough to listen to what they wanted.
“One more thing!” Malik came happily, skipping into Vere’s room. “Something I think you’ll enjoy.”
Vere scoffed, shutting the closet door. “You bought me enough already.” They turned around, seeing Malik hugging something to his chest.
“I didn’t buy this.” Malik laughed, his tail wagging behind him.
Instantly, Vere wondered what Malik stole.
“This was mine ages ago.” Malik held up before Vere a sort of patchwork hoodie. It was long, frayed, and quite old. It was the same colors as Malik’s skin of deep red and dark purple. The sleeves were long and full, coming to a fitted cuff at the end decorated with gold stitching.
“I want you to have it,” he whispered. “It would mean the world to me if you wore it now and again.”
“It’s beautiful,” Vere murmured.
“I know. My sister and I had matching ones growing up. But now, I want you to wear it, as long as you’ll have me.” Malik’s eyes widened as Vere instantly put it on. It was baggy on them, extra long.
“It’s so comfy,” Vere remarked. They smiled up shyly at Malik, then stood before them, posing a bit. “How does it look? Does it suit me?” For the first time in, well, forever, Vere was excited about showing off their clothes.
Malik looked like he was shaking as he watched Vere in his old hoodie. “Vere, may I tackle you to the bed and cuddle you relentlessly?”
It wasn’t just the hoodie that was turning Vere bright red and warm. “Okay.”
They were flung onto the bed, pinned down by Malik’s body and arms. They closed their eyes, wrapping their arms around Malik in return. Heaven was the first word to come to Vere’s mind.
Malik sighed heavily. “Heaven,” he murmured dreamily.
Vere’s throat tightened, and tears came to their eyes again.
“It’s okay,” his voice was gentle, sleepy. “I feel it too.”
Closing their eyes, Vere hugged tighter onto Malik, curling into them, finding they couldn’t get close enough. They weren’t ready yet for intimacy, or, well, the physical act of it. But this? This was perfect. The warm embrace, the scent of his skin and how soft it was against their own.
“I’ve never been so satisfied.” He whispered into Vere’s ear. “You’re amazing, Vere.” Their firm hand petted up and down Vere’s back. “And to think, you’re all mine.”
Vere sniffled, letting out a soft laugh. “Yeah, I can’t believe it myself sometimes.” They peered up, seeing a sleepy, childishly cheerful expression on Malik’s face. “What has it been like before? I mean…have you had other partners?”
“Oh, of course,” Malik sighed. “An incubus has to eat, now don’t they?” They pursed their lips, thinking for a moment. “They always got what they wanted. I also got the meal I needed. But it was transactional. Like Spicy Dish. I’ve never had it given like a gift before. I’ve never felt it directed at me in such a way as kindness. Lust isn’t love. Love isn’t free.” He smiled back at Vere, petting their hair away from their forehead before kissing it. “We have earned this. It’s fulfilling.”
Vere nodded, smiling back shyly. “Yeah-” they felt stupid replying with just that, but they were breathless, swept away.
Laughing, Malik hugged them tighter and nuzzled the top of their head. “Take your time growing. I am not going anywhere. I’ll be here when you’re ready to blossom. I am patient.”
Patience. Was that all Vere needed?
“It will happen,” Vere assured them.
Malik chuckled smugly. “I know it will. But that doesn’t matter. As long as you want me to cuddle you until the end of time, I do not ask for much else.” He kissed the top of Vere’s head, but Vere lifted their chin, meeting his lips and falling into a deep, gentle kiss that turned into two, three, countless, until they passed out in a puddle on the bed.
It wasn’t hard to notice all the attention Malik got when he was out and about. People stared in a way Vere knew wasn’t just staring. It was more than that. It was deeper, warm, biblical in a sense. Vere could agree Malik was attractive. Anyone could see that. But what Vere didn’t get was the depth of it all. They could look at Malik all day. Hell, they lived with Malik, knew his habits and rituals through and through. He knew Malik better than any of these people. So, why was it so hard to understand that sort of biblical glance?
Vere had taken to studying Malik to try that perspective. But every time they did, it only led to more confusion on their part. More doubt. They tried studying people online to get some sort of grip on things. But nothing. They could admit when someone was beautiful, and all that nonsense. What they couldn’t get was that…oomph feeling. They’d never had that oomph feeling. Vere had accepted it long ago, they were just ‘built different’ as the memes suggested. They had been happy in that regard, just as they were happy proclaiming themself nonbinary.
But then Malik came into their life.
Vere was happy with Malik. Having someone who understood them comforted them. Vere had been so touch and starved until Malik. And now?
Vere wouldn’t say they were being possessive of Malik, far from. But there was a jealousy. It came when they noticed people giving Malik that up and down look. Also, when they would smile or linger too long.
It wasn’t because they wanted to lay claim on Malik. Not at all. Malik could do as he pleased. It was more a sense that they wanted to look at Malik the same way. They could just never conjure up those feelings? Powerful emotions? What was it?
For the first time in their life, Vere felt incomplete. After all these years of being assured in themself. They had been proud to fly their flags high and mighty. Now, doubt had seeped into them. And now, nothing made sense.
“Vere? You awake?” Malik’s voice sent shockwaves through Vere.
“Yes!” Vere hurriedly tried to close the windows on their computer. They didn’t want Malik to walk in and see Vere peering at swimsuit models, cosplayers, and weird Sonic comics. They couldn’t imagine a more horrifying situation.
Malik popped his head in and held up a mug. “I made some tea. Thought you’d enjoy a cup.”
“Oh, thanks.” Vere turned red from embarrassment, something they knew Malik could sense.
Coming into their room, Malik set Vere’s cup down on the desk. “You’ve been awful quiet. I wanted an excuse to check on you.”
“Oh. Yeah. Just um…gaming.” Vere said, nervous.
Malik eyed them suspiciously, but sipped their tea like they were none the wiser. “You seem anxious about something. A lot recently.”
“Yeah well. In this economy?” Vere tried tossing out a joke.
“You know I know better than that.” Malik set their mug down and held Vere’s chin in his hand. “Talk to me.”
Vere pouted, suddenly afraid of saying any of their thoughts out loud.
Malik gave that soft smile. “I’m here for you. Remember?”
They let out a heavy sigh. “It’s hard to say.”
Malik sat down on the edge of Vere’s bed. “That’s okay. We can talk until you get it out. I like that about us.”
That twinge of doubt again as Vere watched Malik pose on their bed. Wearing booty shorts and nothing else. This was a major fantasy, right? Some hot demon in booty shorts? Why did they feel that? They just liked Malik being there, nothing else.
“Hey,” Malik whispered. “Look at me.”
Vere’s eyes flooded with tears. “I’m trying!” The words came out harsher, sharper than Vere intended.
Malik’s eyes widened, and he leaned forward. “Vere-”
“I want to see what everyone else sees!” Vere snapped again. “I look and I look and I just…” They shut their mouth up tight since everything sounded strange coming from them. They hiccuped, trying to suppress their frustrated tears.
Malik’s smile was sincere then, soft and sympathetic. “I’m not asking for you to look at me any other way than how you already do. I told you before, I’m here for you and I can adapt to however you need me. So tell me, what on earth is bothering you?”
Vere sniffled and wiped their eyes, using the hem of their shirt. “You mean a lot to me. And having you here…I’m not sure why but, I feel like I should-” They scoffed, unable to get it out.
Standing, Malik went back to Vere’s side and knelt down before them. “I’ve been sensing a tension every time we go out. A spark from you, I’m not sure how I would classify it. It’s nothing I expected from you. You’re not the jealous type.”
“I’m not.” Vere ran their fingers through Malik’s long hair. “Not of you, not how people look at you. I mean…kind of how they look at you. But not in like the ‘stop looking at him’ way, more like-” Their voice cracked as they tried to find the words.
“You don’t have to force anything on my account.” Malik lifted his head from their lap. “I like us. I like our life.”
“I know but-” Vere looked into Malik’s eyes. “I want to…I dunno.”
Malik smiled. “Experiment?”
Vere’s hands trembled. “I mean-” Their chest was tight with lost breath and shivering nerves. “I’ve never had that thought…until you.”
Smiling, Malik sat up enough to place a soft kiss on Vere’s lips. “That’s why I am here. To help you, to comfort you. In any way I can.”
Vere sniffled again, leaning in closer to take another kiss, a stronger one. They held Malik’s face in their hand, parting their lips, tasting Malik. There was a strange stirring, just from the sensation. Tongues, warmth, wetness.
“Easy.” Malik whispered. “Come here.” He took Vere’s hands and led them to the bed, laying down beside him like so many times they cuddled. Only this time, Malik’s intensity spiked. There was a heat, a pulse.
“You’re so lovely,” Malik whispered. “I’ve always thought so. Slender, soft, sort of my type,” he chuckled. His fingers traced lines along Vere’s shirt, going down slowly until his fingers snuck up along their bare belly, their chest.
“Don’t tease me.” Vere knew they were bright red. Flustered didn’t even describe this.
Malik grinned. “I’m not. I’m telling you the truth.” He sat up, pushing Vere’s shirt up under their neck. He began stroking, caressing his palms along Vere’s soft skin. “I think you’re beautiful, Vere.”
“You are-” Vere didn’t mean to blurt it out like that. Doubt, uncertainty, and frazzlement consumed them. “I mean-” they panted out breathlessly. “You’re beautiful. I want to see you how everyone else does. But they don’t get to see you come out of a shower or make breakfast in the morning. They don’t see what I see and…and I’m glad they don’t.”
Dipping down, Malik kissed Vere, deep again, his tongue parting Vere’s lips. He tasted like green tea. His hands continued to touch, but his kisses traveled down, along their neck, down their chest.
A pulse of fear washed over Vere, and they quickly sat up. “Wait. Stop!” They held Malik at arm’s length and stared into his lavender eyes. “I’m not sure-”
“It’s okay.” Malik touched Vere’s face. “What would you be okay with?”
Vere sat there a moment, thinking. Staring at Malik’s well toned chest and broad shoulders. They leaned in, kissing Malik’s neck, touching his skin. He rested against Malik’s chest, holding him, kissing his neck and shoulder slowly.
“Touch me,” Vere spoke softly.
Malik did so, stroking Vere’s bare back, slowly.
Shutting their eyes, they took in the sensation of Malik’s palms upon them. Warm, soft, inviting. Vere kissed Malik’s skin more, the deep purple stripes, the blue splotches. They took a deep breath and reached down, searching around below until they felt.
Oh.
Oh!
It was bigger than they expected.
Malik chuckled into Vere’s ear. “Never seen me hard yet, have you?”
“Do you have enough blood elsewhere?” Their voice shuddered from nerves. It was their first time ever touching…well. They had seen and tried this kind of thing once before. But they had never…
Oh!
Malik whispered into Vere’s ear. “May I touch you too?”
Vere shuddered, nodding.
A soft caress of Malik’s hand along their belly, down between thighs, moving over the fabric of their Hello Kitty pajama bottoms. A moan from his lips echoed in Vere’s ear. And there. Holy shit! Vere gasped in alarm.
“Ah,” Malik panted. “What do we have here?”
Vere buried their face in Malik’s shoulder with a whimper.
“Don’t be afraid. I’m impressed. Then again, your body is beautiful, it would make sense your cock would also be, well, impressive.”
“Nothing compares to you,” Vere whimpered against Malik’s neck. “Moan in my ear again. Please!”
Malik did so eagerly, whimpering, gasping in response to Vere’s touch. Each breath, each sound that came from his lips, enraptured Vere in a way they had never felt before.
“I want to see it. I mean, you!” Vere looked up at Malik with frightened eyes. “Can I watch you, um…show me what to do with it…exactly…”
Malik kissed them. “Alright. I’ll show you.” He eased back onto the bed, laying down. He arched his lips, stripping, then kicking away his booty shorts. Vere’s eyes focused on his legs, his tail. He then spotted a patch of dark purple hair. His cock stood high, arched, pulsing above his body.
“Whoa-” Vere whispered under their breath.
“I like your eyes on me,” Malik panted. He took his hand around his cock, stroking slowly, focused on Vere. He moaned, gasping for breath. His back arched slightly. “It feels so good. Vere. Vere!”
The way Malik moaned their name made them stand at attention, in a couple of ways. Vere slowly stripped, removing the rest of their shirt, kicking off their pajama pants. They crawled up closer to Malik, laying down by his side. Kissing him, they ran their hand along his body. They were trembling, but they were also so certain. At least, they thought so.
Malik took Vere’s hand and put it around his cock. “Touch me. Please?”
Silently, they nodded, moving their hand up and down, watching Malik shudder in pleasure. Vere wanted that, too.
“Hmm?” Malik licked his lips and looked at Vere. “That’s new.” He rolled onto his side, stroking down Vere’s body. “Is it okay?”
They nodded silently again.
Malik tugged down Vere’s underwear, smirking in delight at seeing Vere completely exposed. “Look how cute you are. All smooth, so handsome.”
Vere bit their lip.
“You’re so hard.” Malik took hold of them, and their entire body pulsed and shook. “This is beyond delicious. Oh Vere,” he moaned. “You’re driving me crazy.”
How could they ever drive anyone crazy? Vere thought, though it was a shambled and patched together thought.
“More,” Vere whimpered. “Touch me more.”
Malik kissed them, rubbing his body against them, his cock against their hip. He moaned in Vere’s ear, drinking in the trembling delight Vere took in it.
“That’s it, good, so good,” Malik panted.
“I’m so dizzy,” Vere breathed. “Malik…you’re amazing. You’re so-” They went in for another kiss.
Malik took hold of both their cocks, stroking them together. “Breath, don’t pass out on me.” He kissed Vere again, moaning as their pulses mashed, becoming one. “You’re doing amazing. You taste divine.”
“I’ve never felt like this.” Vere shivered again. “It’s…strange…”
Malik smiled. “Do you want to take a break?”
Vere nodded while a few tears in their eyes. Malik released them and they hugged tight onto him, grasping him close, their grip iron tight.
Malik cupped the back of Vere’s head. “I’ve got you, love. I’m here.” He stroked Vere’s soft hair. “I’m yours.”
Taking in a shudder breath, Vere tried to calm themself. “Is this…is this how you feel all the time?”
“No,” Malik chuckled. “Only occasionally. If I were to go around like this all the time, I’d go insane.” He kissed Vere’s temple and breathed in the scent of their hair. “Usually, when I’m with you, I’m quite satisfied.”
“Really?” Vere whimpered.
“Of course! I told you that in the beginning, didn’t I? My libido is based on your libido. So what I feel right now is all you.”
Vere was shot by a lightning bolt. It coursed through their body, tensing their muscles, shocking their brain. Every thought was silenced, but wired. “It is?”
“Yes, I’m aroused because you are.” He nuzzled into Vere’s neck. “Your pulse is my pulse, and I am surging for you because of you. I am desperate to satisfy you in any way you desire.”
“I-” Vere’s throat went tight, dry in that instant.
He pulled back to look Vere in the face. “Vere, I adore you. I love my life here. I love you.” He smiled and petted the tears that came to Vere’s eyes. “Of all the things you doubt, never doubt that.”
Vere kissed him deeply, sniffling. “You mean it?”
Malik laughed, hugging Vere tightly back. “If I lie, please, lightning may strike me!” A silent beat, and then they both laughed at the absurdity of the moment. “See? No lightning. That means I love you. Doesn’t it?”
Tears poured from Vere’s eyes as they buried their face in Malik’s chest. It was strange to hear. Especially here of all places. They kissed Malik again, holding them close, rubbing against his strong, large body. Malik moaned against their lips, breath catching as the pulse continued to grow.
Vere grew dizzy. They were uncertain what to do with their hands. Do I touch him here? Do I feel him up there? They scrambled, grasping at Malik’s back, only knowing they wanted him close to his body.
Closer!
Closer!
More! More! More!
Vere’s entire being tensed. A new feeling! No. More than that. It was so intense, so extreme. It scared them for a moment. There was no pulsing, no breathing. It was a rush. No. More powerful than that even.
It was a release.
“Look at you,” Malik whispered into Vere’s ear. “You came for me.”
Vere was shuddering, barely able to speak. They just went limp.
Malik moaned into their ear as something warm surged against Vere’s belly. “Look at what you’re capable of.”
“I can’t think-” Vere whimpered.
Laughing, Malik kissed them, stroking their hair. “You did it.”
Vere shut their eyes, trying to put all their thoughts together. It was…so much! So much they weren’t used to. More tears.
“It’s okay.” Malik held them close. “You did beautifully.”
Vere remained silent, clutching Malik until it was as if the world was melting away. They were warm, safe, and then everything was soft. They drifted away, passing out from the exertion in Malik’s arms.
Vere woke in their dark room, aware they weren’t alone in the black inkiness of the night. They stretched out, yawning and relaxing against the warm bed. They stared out through the darkness, thoughts pieced together much better than before.
“Vere?” Malik murmured sleepily.
“Thank you,” Vere whispered. “That was…wonderful.” They chuckled, still a bit in disbelief.
Malik sighed dreamily, his hand resting on Vere’s bare chest. “I will do anything for you. I’m so glad you allowed me to share that with you.”
Vere inched closer to Malik on the bed, laying there, hoping their eyes would adjust so they could see Malik in the dark. “I don’t know if, or when, I’ll ever feel like it again.”
“You don’t need to force yourself on my account,” Malik purred.
“I liked it, though. Now that I can sort it out. I love being with you. But…I think it would only ever be you. I don’t think I could ever feel that way around anyone else,” the confession slipped out easily, freely. “It makes me so happy it’s you. I only ever want you.”
“You’ll make me cry,” he chuckled.
Vere smiled, able to see Malik’s lavender irises in the darkness. “I like what we have,” they continued. “If I ever lost that, I don’t think I’d ever be okay again.”
“It’s not going away,” Malik assured them, touching their face. “It will never go away. I promise.” His tail brushed against Vere’s leg under the comforter. The velvety texture of it relaxed Vere, helping them to ease back to sleep in Malik’s arms.
Harsh morning light woke Vere next. They sat up, rubbing their eyes, grumbling irritably under their breath. They got up, barely realizing they were nude, as they shuffled to the bathroom. Vere rinsed out their mouth, gazing into the mirror. There was a hickey on their neck.
“Ah-”
“Good morning.” Malik slinked into the bathroom door, a love drunk smile upon his face. “What would you like for breakfast this morning? Something big to recover all that energy from last night?”
“You gave me a hickey!” Vere gasped.
Malik licked his lips as he smirked. “So I did! Are you going to wear turtlenecks or should we go shopping for concealer?”
Vere’s face was bright red. “I’ve never had one before.”
“Lots of firsts last night.” Malik kissed Vere’s cheek lovingly. “I’ve got coffee on. Why don’t we chat over a cup or two?”
Vere looked into his eyes, heart skipping a beat. “Chat?”
“I want to tell you how cute you were last night, in very vivid detail.” He chuckled, holding out his hand. “I wouldn’t mind hearing my praises sung as well.”
Vere took his hand, holding it tight. “I wouldn’t know where to start.”
“Well, the beginning.” Malik grinned from ear to ear and Vere followed suit, clutching his hand tight as he led them into the kitchen.
24 , almost always high , messy , anti social , distant from his family , movie geek , grumpy , super possessive , secret nerd , cigarette smoke , depressed .
𝑨𝑺𝑬𝑿𝑼𝑨𝑳 𝑹𝑬𝑨𝑫𝑬𝑹 "moth"
21 , social loser , nonchalant , black cat , collects trinkets , smoker , music geek , anxious , grunge , yapper , sleeps a lot , coffee , wired earphones .
these are my babies i hope you guys love them too :3
In which you come out as asexual to your new boyfriend, and he realises he’s not the only person who feels like that.
AU: No astrophage
Pairing: Ace!Ryland Grace x Ace!Gn!Reader
Word Count: 1k
Warnings/tags: non-graphic talk of sex, coming out, fluff, new but established relationship, very light implications of autistic Ryland. Both Ryland and reader have had and enjoyed sex in the past, they’re just not interested. Ryland Grace is a sweetheart. Ryland nerds out about LOTR.
Notes: I love to write smut of the man and I love to write fluffy acespec fic of him. Two things can be true. This isn’t great, I’m flaring up AND Endo is kicking my ass again so I’m exhausted.
Four months ago, you’d agreed to a blind date that turned out to be the best thing you’ve ever done.
You hadn’t dated in years. This was by choice, needing time to figure yourself out and focus on your career.
You hadn’t agreed out of loneliness, exactly. You’d made a life that fit you well, and didn’t need a partner. You had a comfortable home and a good job.
But your friend had asked you to just go on one date with this guy she knows, because you were her only single friend.
“He’s nice,” she’d told you. “Like, such a sweetheart. He’s a schoolteacher, and you can tell he enjoys his job. He’s kind of awkward at first but he’s really funny once he warms up to you. I think you’ll like him.”
You did, in fact, like him.
Ryland Grace is unlike most men you’ve dated in the past. He’s awkward in a way that feels unpracticed rather than off-putting, like he never learned the same script that everyone else seems to follow. Your friend wasn’t wrong about him. He’s kind. He’s funny in a slightly rambling, very self-aware way. He’s genuine in a way that makes you feel at ease.
He’s never been anything but polite since the very first time you met. Careful, almost, with your space. With you.
After a few months of quiet dinners, long walks and good conversation that never felt forced, he’d asked if you’d like to make it official. You’d said yes without hesitation.
The topic of sex hasn’t really come up.
You noticed that quickly. He hasn’t even asked if you’d like to, hasn’t made a single advance. You’re grateful for that in ways you don’t know how to express.
You’re asexual. Always have been, you just didn’t figure it out for a very long time. The idea of sex doesn’t repulse you, you just don’t want to. Past partners haven’t always understood that.
It’s not like you haven’t cuddled with Ryland, been physically intimate in ways that aren’t sexual. You do enjoy kissing him.
But you’re unsure if he wants anything more.
Delaying the conversation even longer just feels stupid when it’s inevitable anyway, so you have a plan.
This evening, you’re going to his place for dinner. You’ll talk to him about it then and hope for the best.
The evening rolls around, cool air and darkness rolling over San Francisco like gentle waves over sand.
You arrive at Ryland’s apartment with a bottle of wine and the words you’ve already carefully chosen flitting around your mind like frantic butterflies with no place to go.
Dinner is nice. He jokes about not getting to cook very often, he usually just opts for frozen meals because he is- he was a single man living alone.
The words slip out halfway through the meal.
“How do you feel about sex?”
You blanch at your own words. That isn’t how you meant to say it.
He chokes on his wine, staring at you with wide eyes.
“Wh-what?!” He coughs, setting his glass down with a slightly unsteady hand.
“That came out wrong, I’m so sorry,” you reply hastily. “I mean to ask, well… is sex important to you in a relationship?”
He blinks at you, processing the words.
“Um- not really. I mean, it’s… okay, I guess? I’ve only…” he trails off, looking embarrassed.
“You’ve only what?”
“I’ve only had it a few times. I enjoyed it, but uh…” he pauses, trying to find the words. “I’m not really- I’m not interested in it, exactly. I could definitely live without it.”
You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.
“Good. That makes this so much easier.”
“What? Why?” He tilts his head.
“Ryland, I’m asexual,” you study his face for a reaction.
“Asexual. That’s the thing where you don’t feel sexual attraction, right?” he asks, thrumming his fingers against the table.
“Yes, that’s the definition,” you nod. “But lots of ace people experience it differently, it’s a spectrum.”
“How do you experience it?” He looks genuinely curious.
“Well, I’ve experienced sexual attraction in the past. Sometimes I still do, but it’s very rare. I’ve had sex in the past and enjoyed it, but like you, I’m just not really interested.” You explain, shrugging.
“Oh,” he stares down at his hands then looks back at you. “I didn’t know anyone else felt like that. I thought I was just weird, broken.”
“You’re not broken, Ryland.”
“Do you think I might… be asexual?”
“If that’s what you feel comfortable with, then yes. But you don’t have to label yourself.”
“Okay… I- thank you for- uh- for telling me. For trusting me with that,” he reaches across to you and takes your hand, squeezing it gently.
“You don’t need to thank me,” you squeeze his hand back. “I really like you, and I can see this relationship going somewhere. I just needed to make sure you understood that sex isn’t really… a thing we’ll be doing.”
“That’s fine- that’s completely fine. We can just… cuddle and watch movies. Do I still get to kiss you?”
You laugh. “Yes, Ry. You still get to kiss me.”
“Alright, that’s good.”
There’s a pause where you maintain comfortable eye contact before he breaks it.
“I have ice cream for dessert. Wanna eat that on the couch and watch The Hobbit?”
“Absolutely,” you grin. “We should binge the whole LOTR series.”
His face lights up at that.
“Really? You’d do that? I have the extended editions on DVD, it will take us a while to get through them but we can definitely do it!”
“I’ve never watched the extended editions,” you admit. “How much longer are they?”
“They add about two hours to the runtime, but it’s so worth it! They add so many amazing scenes that you don’t get in the normal movies- oh, wow, sorry. I’m being a bit intense.” He smiles sheepishly.
“No, keep going. I want to hear more,” you lean forward, genuinely interested.
