#assassin!mc

[harunayuuka]

Barbatos: MC? What are you still doing? Breakfast is ready.

MC: Dear, I think Nox wants to be a surgeon when he grows up.

Nox: *age 3* *holding a knife and has a doll as his patient*

Barbatos: *chuckles* I don't think I will trust him to handle patients carefully.

MC: That's your perspective, But I think he's doing a great job.

Barbatos: *smiles* Anyway, let's go downstairs and eat breakfast.

Barbatos: Nox, would you put your toy and your knife down?

Nox: *throws the doll to the floor and puts the knife close to him*

Barbatos: *chuckles* Nox...

----------------------------------------------------

Diavolo: MC, you can take a seat.

MC: I will politely decline, young master.

Diavolo: Why?

MC: My demon tail is acting up.

Lucifer: Well, you're still learning to control it.

Barbatos: *also in his demon form* *stands next to them*

Mammon: Oi! Oi! You two got a kid and you're still flirting?!

Barbatos: *smiles* It's none of your business, Mammon. *his tail intertwines with MC's*

Asmo: Ne, MC~ Can I touch your tail sometimes?

MC: It's off-limits.

Asmo: Aww...

Belphie: Guys, before you start discussing about tails, can you please give me a hand here?

Nox: *trying to stab him on the chest with his knife*

MC: Nox.

Nox: *looks at MC and stops*

Belphie: Gosh. He only listens to you.

Barbatos: *chuckles* As he should.

---------------------------------------------------

MC and Barbatos: *went to MC's old house with their son, Nox*

Barbatos: MC, go ahead. Nox and I will look around.

MC: *nods*

Nox: Blood.

MC: Hm. You're smart, Nox. You have detected someone is coming.

*someone is approaching them with a scythe*

Stranger: What is this? Did you get lost? *laughs*

Barbatos: My, *chuckles* I think the "No Trespassing" sign didn't work.

MC: Don't be like that, dear. Maybe he's illiterate.

Stranger: Huh? What did you say? Are you trying to be comedians- *falls to the floor with a knife struck on his forehead*

Barbatos: That was an impressive throw, Nox.

Nox: Hm.

Barbatos: *chuckles*

MC: *puts on gloves* You should at least let people finish their punchline.

Nox: Nox no good?

MC: *pats his head* You did well.

Nox: *smiles*

Barbatos: Look at that. You smile when you know I don't have my camera.

[harunayuuka]

The demons MC's targeting: *gathered in a single place because they've received a message from their companion*

The demons: Are you sure he's here? Did he succeed on killing that human?

MC: No. *steps into the room*

The demons: !!!

MC: *holding the hand of the demon they killed in their apartment* Well, what did you even expect that would happen? Anyway, blood message does actually work.

The demons: *starts snarling at them*

MC: Let's see... 198. I wonder if I manage to collect all of you here.

The demons: WE'RE GOING TO KILL YOU AND SHRED YOU TO PIECES!!!

MC: I'll do a quick headcount. Now do me a favor and behave accordingly.

The demons: AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

--------------------------------------------

MC: 196... 197... 198. Hm. I think that is all. Though...*looking at the bloody mess*

MC: Should I ask him to help?

MC: *shrugs the idea off* No. That'll be unprofessional of me—

Barbatos: *chuckles* It's not. Let me help you clean.

MC: ...

MC: What are you doing here?

Barbatos: You missed lunch.

MC: Ah.

MC: ...

MC: Does that mean I won't have any food to eat?

Barbatos: *shows them the lunchbox* No. What kind of a husband I am if I neglect you?

MC: ...

MC: Sure. Anyway, would you like to step out for a moment?

Barbatos: Hm? But I'm here to help.

MC: As I've said a while ago, it's unprofessional.

Barbatos: Okay. If you don't want me to, can you at least let me stay here?

--------------------------------------------

Barbatos: *frowning*

Diavolo: What's wrong, Barbatos? Is MC not done yet?

Barbatos: I believe they're almost done by now, young master.

Diavolo: Then what's with that face?

Lucifer: He's complaining that he has been kicked out when he tried to offer his help.

Barbatos: I'm not complaining about that.

Lucifer: You're sulking. Visibly.

Diavolo: Well, maybe MC was just shy? I mean, you two are a couple but you don't live in a same house.

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: Are you saying they're feeling distant to me?

Lucifer and Diavolo: ...

Lucifer: Were they not from the beginning?

Barbatos: No... MC was always considerate of me...

MC: *opens the door to the office* Dear, I'm sorry for making you wait. *has changed their clothes*

Barbatos: *his face brightens* No. You're just in time.

Lucifer: MC, I've heard from the other students that everything is spotless.

MC: There were places that needed deep cleaning, but it was manageable.

Diavolo: You seem exhausted. Why not take some rest here?

Barbatos: You can sit on my lap and maybe take a nap as well.

Lucifer and Diavolo: ...

MC: I'll take that offer. Thank you. *goes to actually sit on his lap, facing him*

Diavolo: Uh... I think we need to give them some privacy, Lucifer.

Lucifer: You should've just given them a room!

Barbatos: You smell nice...

MC: Because of the fabric.

Barbatos: *chuckles*

[harunayuuka]

Barbatos: You're pursuing me... for the citizenship?

MC: I know that sounds kinda... jerk of me, but I just hate home and I want to get out of here.

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: What can you offer to me then if ever I accept this arrangement?

MC: ...

MC: I can clean very well.

Barbatos: *chuckles* No. My cleaning skills are already superior than anyone.

MC: No. I'm talking about OTHER type of cleaning.

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: Is it spotless?

MC: You're not even going to think someone set foot on there.

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: *writes something on his notepad* Do you need a gown?

MC: No, thank you.

Barbatos: *smiles* Okay. Be sure not to be late in our wedding.

MC: I hope the same with you.

[harunayuuka]

Employer: MC, I have a new assignment for you. *hands them a picture of a guy*

MC: Where's his profile, master?

Employer: No. You're not killing him. Instead, I want you to learn his likes, dislikes, his preference, everything and report them back to me.

MC: ...

MC: Do you have a crush on this guy, master?

Employer: *blushes* *then sigh in frustration* But he's too innocent for this world and I can't approach him.

MC: ...

MC: I think the ones you can never approach are idols.

Employer: ...

Employer: Are trying to say that-

MC: You're just being a coward, master.

Employer: Hmph! Just because you have a husband!

MC: Don't feel bad, master. I just have the necessary experience.

---------------------------------------------

Barbatos: *seeing the picture of an unknown guy in their bed*

Barbatos: ...

MC: *took the photo and clipped it together with the other files*

Barbatos: That guy is handsome.

MC: He will never be handsome than you.

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: *smiles* *his jealousy already gone*

Barbatos: So would you be home tonight or do you still have work to do?

MC: I just need to escort my employer to the meeting place.

Barbatos: Alright. Will you be riding Alphonse (the owl)?

MC: No. He's yours.

Barbatos: Okay. Take care.

MC: *gives him a kiss on the cheek before leaving*

Barbatos: *satisfied sigh*

Lucifer: *knocks*

Barbatos: What is it this time, Lucifer?

Lucifer: Your Alphonse is fighting with Cerberus again.

Barbatos: Oh. They're becoming close.

Lucifer: No, they're not. Help me to separate them.

----------------------------------------------

Barbatos: *noticed that MC is running late*

Barbatos: Do you think something happened, Alphonse?

Alphonse: Hoot! *shaking its head*

Barbatos: *smiles* If you say so. *then he receives a phone call from MC*

Barbatos: MC? I thought you would be home early?

MC: I'm attending a wedding of my employer and her now groom.

Barbatos: But... They were supposed to date first, didn't they?

MC: She's an impatient woman. Now I have to make sure that their honeymoon trip will go smoothly.

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: MC, are you annoyed?

MC: Watching couples flirt in front of me while I'm away from my dear husband is infuriating.

Barbatos: *smiles while blushing*

Barbatos: I'll talk to you over the phone so you won't be bored on your trip. *then hears a random girl talking to MC*

The girl: H-Hello? C-Can we take a picture together?

MC: Why?

The girl: You look like my future partner—

MC: No. I'm not.

The girl: But—

MC: Find somebody else. I have a husband.

The girl: O-Okay. Sorry for bothering you. *then quickly walks away*

MC: ...

MC: Dear, are you still there?

Barbatos: I will see you in half an hour.

MC: What changed your mind?

Barbatos: *chuckles*

MC: ...

MC: I think someone is approaching me again— *gets a hug from behind*

Barbatos: You're a cheeky one. Do you know that?

MC: *lowkey proud of themselves because they have unlocked another jealousy level of Barbatos*

[harunayuuka]

Barbatos: *cuddling MC while they are in bed*

Barbatos: Why do I feel like a lot of demons are getting interested in you day by day?

MC: You mean like how there's one under the bed.

Barbatos: Yes. Not a good hiding spot if you ask me.

MC: There's one in my closet either.

Barbatos: Are they just waiting for us to fall asleep?

MC: Hm. I wonder. *tries to get up*

Barbatos: *pulling them back* Stay. Trust me, they won't even try to escape.

MC: *sigh* Alright. I'll just let the poison do its charm.

*Both the demons under the bed and in the closet start coughing*

Barbatos: You'll need to change your entire wardrobe afterwards.

MC: Yes.

Barbatos: No. How about we move out? What do you say?

MC: There's nothing cheaper than this apartment.

Barbatos: MC, you're making your husband useless.

MC: That's not what I mean, dear.

Barbatos: *kisses their forehead* I know. But let's move out, alright? Make my house your little playground.

MC: You're being generous.

Barbatos: No. You are.

*Makes out while the demons are slowly suffocating*

-------------------------------------------

Diavolo: MC! *throws his arms around them* I'm glad you finally decided to move here!

Lucifer: Diavolo.

Diavolo: I'll show you around! As you may already know, we have a lot of rooms here but I made sure that you and Barbatos would share a room!

MC: That's great.

Lucifer: *sigh* Seriously. *looks at Barbatos* I thought you're going to move to your own place.

Barbatos: My father saw them and he tried to flirt with them. *smiling*

Lucifer: ...

Lucifer: I see. I'm glad you took the safest option.

Barbatos: Oh, but I made sure I gave him a good punch before we left.

Lucifer: ...

Lucifer: Couldn't blame you on that.

Diavolo: Barbatos! What are you still doing there?

MC: *looking at him*

Barbatos: *smiles genuinely*

Lucifer: By the way, are these all their belongings?

Barbatos: Yes.

Lucifer: Hm. But something feels weird about them.

Barbatos: It's just your imagination.

---------------------------------------------

MC: ...

MC: Do you think Lord Diavolo know?

Barbatos: What do you mean?

MC: I like things that are pure white.

Barbatos: *chuckles* I didn't know that. May I ask why?

MC: Fresh blood looks beautiful on it. But it will be difficult to remove the stains later.

Barbatos: *smiles* I would be jealous if the young master knows you more than I do.

MC: That's unnecessary. *embraces him*

MC: So, what do you want me to do with the intruder?

Barbatos: You noticed him? You really are sharp.

MC: I saw that he has some keys with him. What are those for?

Barbatos: There are some prisoners in the dungeon.

MC: Ah.

Barbatos: Do you want to have fun? Let's call it a date.

MC: But I want to do it alone.

Barbatos: Why is that?

MC: ...

MC: It's embarrassing.

Barbatos: *smiles* Alright. I'll let you. But before that, could you give me a few minutes of your time?

MC: *slightly shivers with his cold touch*

Barbatos: Don't worry. I'll make sure to warm you up from within.

---------------------------------------------

The intruder: That Barbatos is so busy with his human that he didn't notice me stealing the keys!

Prisoners: Yeah!!! Free us all!!!

The intruder: Shh. Quiet! If anyone hears us—

MC: That's right. You should be quiet.

The intruder: !!!

Prisoners: A human! *starts whistling*

Prisoners: Let's eat them before we escape this place!

MC: Hm...

The intruder: *laughs mockingly* Are you still sleepy, human? How's the taste of a demon's ****?

Prisoners: *laughs*

MC: Now I'm glad I've only asked to go myself.

The intruder: What?

MC: You see... My husband doesn't hold much mercy.

*The prisoners stared in confusion when MC had cut the intruder in half without making any much noise*

MC: *picks up the keys that fell on the floor* *looks at the prisoners*

Prisoners: !!!

MC: You have time to say your prayers since I'm going to open each cell one by one.

MC: But I guess you won't be able to do that because you are demons. Oh well, not my problem anymore. *goes to choose a cell*

One of the prisoners: No... No... NO!!!!!!!!

------------------------------------------

Diavolo: Barbatos? Where's MC?

Barbatos: They'll be here in a few moments, young master.

Lucifer: Hm?

Diavolo: What's wrong, Lucifer?

Lucifer: I think I just heard a scream just now.

Diavolo: That must be the prisoners again. Anyway, don't mind them. They'll quiet down once they got tired.

[harunayuuka]

MC: *just got home after finishing their job*

Barbatos: Welcome home.

MC: *got startled a bit*

Barbatos: *chuckles* Are you alright?

MC: ...

MC: I wasn't able to sense you. How long have you been waiting?

Barbatos: Two hours or less. I also cooked you some food in case that you're hungry.

MC: ...

MC: Did you use my kitchen?

Barbatos: Yes. And I could say that you have quite a unique one.

MC: I hope you didn't replace any of the bottles I have in the drawer.

Barbatos: No. But disguising poisons as condiments? Isn't that dangerous?

MC: Being able to distinguish them, you're far more dangerous than I.

Barbatos: *chuckles* Anyway, let's eat before the food gets cold.

--------------------------------------------

Barbatos: Someone's trying to target the young master.

MC: I figured.

Barbatos: Would you take care of them for me?

MC: Yes, dear. If that's what you want me to do.

Barbatos: *smiles* Can you address me more affectionately?

MC: Hm. *stood up*

Barbatos: *still smiling*

MC: Now I understand why you need my help.

Barbatos: I know.

MC: These ones are much weaker but can be a huge nuisance. *looks up*

The demon on the ceiling: *eyes widened*

MC: *throws a knife at him* *piercing his head*

*the demon dropping to the ground, dead*

Barbatos: Hm. You killed him without bursting his head open.

MC: As you could see, the knife was sharp.

Barbatos: Are you trying to keep the place clean because we're eating?

MC: Yes. I'm sure you don't want to eat in a messy place.

Barbatos: *smiles* Yes.

--------------------------------------------

Diavolo: MC! I missed you! *hugging them*

Lucifer: Diavolo, MC is a married individual.

Barbatos: *smiling*

Diavolo: Oh. Right. I'm sorry. Anyway, why are you here, MC?

MC: I'm here to do a general cleaning.

Lucifer: But RAD is huge. Are you sure about that?

MC: Yes.

Diavolo: We can ask the brothers to help—

MC: No. I work more efficiently when I'm alone.

Diavolo: *sad frowns* Is that so... Well, how about you stop by at my office after you're finished? Barbatos will also be there.

Barbatos: MC?

MC: ?

Barbatos: Can you come closer for a second?

MC: *walks to him* What is it?

Barbatos: *whispers* 198.

MC: Ah... Got it.

Lucifer: *confused frown*

Barbatos: You should wear a facemask since there's a lot of impurities in the air.

MC: I'll do that once I start. Lord Diavolo, I'm going now.

Diavolo: Okay! I'm rooting for you! *chuckles*

Lucifer: *still looking at MC*

Barbatos: Lucifer, I'll prick your eyes.

Lucifer: *frowns* I'm just looking.

Barbatos: *smiles* Don't.

[harunayuuka]

Lucifer: You've got yourself a partner?

Barbatos: Why, yes. Is it that surprising?

Lucifer: You're not the type to fall hardly in love with someone.

Barbatos: *smiles* This one is really unique. I can't help but be fascinated.

MC: *talking with Diavolo from a distance*

Lucifer: I don't see anything worthy about them.

Barbatos: I would be surprised if you did. You're not their partner anyway.

Lucifer: ...

Diavolo: Are you sure don't want to live in the Demon Lord's Castle with your husband?

MC: No. And we had already agreed on certain arrangements.

Diavolo: I see. Anyway, I'm excited to see what your baby will look like in the future.

MC: ...

MC: Having children is out of the question right now.

Diavolo: Why? You mean Barbatos married you without thinking such?

MC: No. It is my personal choice.

MC: *glances at Barbatos and accidentally caught something*

MC: By the way, sir. I've heard they're selling special drinks today.

Diavolo: Really? Then we must try it.

MC: Go ahead, sir.

Diavolo: Hm? Are you not going to—

*MC disappeared*

Diavolo: Huh?

-----------------------------------------

Barbatos: MC, the young master is deeply worried about you.

MC: *listening to him from their phone* I'll be back in a few minutes.

Barbatos: Hm. I can cover for you if you didn't manage.

MC: Trust me. I'll be there in a few minutes.

Barbatos: *chuckles* Alright. See you. *hangs up*

MC: *pouring hydrogen peroxide over the corpse*

MC: I'll make sure you're squeaky clean.

---------------------------------------------

Diavolo: MC! Where have you been?

MC: I had to change my clothes since they don't fit with the ambiance.

Diavolo: Oh, you. Even Lucifer don't fit with the ambiance himself.

Lucifer: Excuse me?

Barbatos: Dear, make sure not to get yourself drunk.

MC: I can drink a few glasses. No need to worry about me.

Diavolo: Then, cheers to MC and Barbatos's marriage and hope you have an everlasting one!

All of them: Cheers!

-------------------------------------------

Barbatos: *taking MC home to their rented apartment*

Barbatos: This seems improper for a newly-married couple..

MC: It would be more improper if we live together.

Barbatos: *chuckles* Anyway, where did you put the corpse?

MC: That's for me to keep.

Barbatos: *smiles* Okay. *goes to kiss their cheek*

MC: ...

MC: You didn't have to do that.

Barbatos: A bit of affection won't hurt us.

[harunayuuka]

Barbatos: You're quite early today. *smiles* *he's in MC's apartment again*

MC: The task was easier than expected.

Barbatos: I see. Good job as always.

MC: *noticed that he's moving some of his stuff to their apartment lately*

*as how they could see Barbatos wearing a kitchen apron*

Barbatos: By the way, I went ahead and stored some ingredients in your fridge. I hope you don't mind.

MC: No. That saves me a lot of time. Thank you.

Barbatos: You should take a seat now.

MC: *watches him prepare the table*

Barbatos: We should start living together.

MC: ...

Barbatos: Though I'm not trying to impose.

MC: Are you not?

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: *takes a seat in front of them* *gently placing his hand over theirs*

Barbatos: *looking at them in a teasing manner*

Barbatos: May I hear the exact thing you told Asmodeus?

MC: ...

MC: I don't understand.

Barbatos: *rubbing his index finger on their skin*

MC: ...

MC: *sigh* Fine. I'll tell you.

---------------------------------------------

*Three days ago, in a bar, where Asmo held a party*

Barbatos: Try not to drink too much.

MC: I'm not a fan of liquor.

Barbatos: *smiles* *leans closer* You don't have to be worried about Asmodeus flirting with you. I have already warned him.

MC: I'm not worried. You know I'm only yours, dear.

Barbatos: ...

Barbatos: *smiles* Of course.

Asmo: MC? I know it's you! *comes to drag them*

Diavolo: Barbatos?

Barbatos: Yes, young master.

Diavolo: *chuckles* Let them enjoy a little bit.

Barbatos: That's what I'm doing.

Diavolo: Alright. Let's go to our table.

Barbatos: *glances at MC's direction before he turns to follow Diavolo*

----------------------------------------------

Asmo: *whines* MC~ You're no fun! You should drink!

Mammon: Dude, maybe they're a lightweight and they don't want to get drunk.

Beel: No, MC can drink. They just don't like how some liquor taste.

MC: *nods*

Asmo: Okay. How about we play truth or dare?

MC: ...

Mammon: MC, you're free to decline. I'm sure he's just curious about your lovelife.

Asmo: After I got threatened by Barbatos? Of course!

MC: ...

MC: Okay. I'll play.

----------------------------------------------

Lucifer: What's wrong, Barbatos? You seem restless.

Barbatos: I need to check on MC to see if they're doing fine.

Diavolo: I heard they're playing truth or dare. And MC has been drinking a lot to avoid their turns.

Barbatos: Oh. Then they must be drunk by now. Please excuse me for a moment.

Lucifer and Diavolo: *watches him leave*

Lucifer: That's a lie, didn't you?

Diavolo: *chuckles* I feel like something good is about to happen.

Lucifer: So their PDA in the office was not enough for you?

Diavolo: Oh come on. You also enjoyed watching.

---------------------------------------------

Asmo: MC! It's your turn again! Truth or Dare!

MC: Truth. *has been doing dares "to drink three glasses" for a while*

Asmo: What do you consider the most attractive about your husband?

MC: ...

Mammon: Dude, I think they're already drunk—

MC: Him.

Asmo: Oooohhh~ I like that! So why are you living separately from each other?

MC: *drinks*

Asmo: Aww... I guess that's a sensitive topic. Changing the question. Imagine you two are in bed—

Mammon: Oi!

Beel: That's invasion of privacy.

Asmo: Fine! Fine! This question now for real!

Asmo: Imagine you saw Barbatos killing someone with his own hands, how will you— *his eyes widened*

MC: *blushing* Mesmerizing...

Mammon and Beel: ...

Barbatos: I think that's enough. I need to take my spouse home.

Barbatos: MC?

MC: *stood up*

Barbatos: You don't need to force yourself.

MC: I'm fine. I'm sober.

Barbatos: *chuckles* That's not what I see. *then glances at Asmo*

Asmo: *tried to cover himself with a bottle*

Barbatos: Asmo, I'm warning you.

Asmo: ...