Auto Interview
Okay. Let’s Start:
What’s your name?
Makaela
What is your name really?
I’m not sure really.
Why are you not sure?
It changes so many times in my head?
Why are you conducting this interview?
Because it’s an assignment for school.
Why are you conducting this interview?
I’m supposed to let my consciousness be free.
Why are you conducting this interview?
I need to understand myself better.
What is your name?
Whatever you want it to be.
Who are you?
I am a college senior.
Who are you really?
Another pawn in a capitalist game of “Life”.
Why are you here?
I’m here to make art.
And what is art?
Art is everything.
What is art?
Art is energy, it’s loud, it’s quiet, it’s survival.
Where are you from?
I was born in the united states.
Is that where you’re from?
I come from the earth: ashes and rock.
Are you connected to nature?
I am completely detached from reality.
Are you connected with nature?
I am every grain of sand on the beach, and simultaneously nothing at all.
Why are you here?
To prove that I once existed.
What are you?
A human.
What are you?
An abstract thought.
What are you?
A small fragment lost in space.
When were you born?
My birthday is April 21.
When were you born?
In the year 1999.
How old are you?
I am 21 years old.
How old are you?
I’ve existed before time itself.
How tall are you?
5’5” and 2’0” at the same time.
What is your favorite color?
Green like trees.
So you like trees?
My breath is synchronized to theirs.
Can you breathe right now?
Barely.
Why is that?
Because I’m really, really high.
Are you a drug addict?
No, I can stop anytime I want.
Can you stop now?
I don’t want to.
Do you feel alone?
Always, but I never am.
Who is there with you?
My friends and family.
Who leave you alone?
My family and friends.
Do you like to be alone?
Comfort shares a space with sadness in solitude.
Can I make you happy?
I have pills for that.
What kind of pills?
The happy kinds. They’re blue.
Isn’t that ironic?
Yes.
What time is it?
It’s past midnight.
Why are you awake?
Because the crickets are singing to me.
Do you like to stay up late?
Enjoyment isn’t a factor.
Are you a morning person?
I’m an anything person if i’m happy enough.
What’s your favorite time of day?
4:00.
Why 4:00?
Nothing feels real at 4:00PM.
Are you real?
I sure hope not.
Why not?
Because then i’d have to pay rent.
Do you live by yourself?
I live with 4 other people.
Do you live by yourself?
I am locked inside my room but I have the key.
Are you in your house right now?
Yes I am.
Where inside your house?
My new bedroom.
Do you like your new bedroom?
Yes and no
What do you like about your new bedroom?
Natural light and cool air.
What don’t you like about your new bedroom?
It cost $300 a month plus utilities.
Do you like the indoors or outdoors better?
I like the indoors and the outdoors too.
Why do you like outdoors?
Because there is sun and trees and ladybug kisses.
Why do you like indoors?
I can hide.
Tell me a secret.
I don’t think I am good enough to be an artist.
What is an artist?
They make the world beautiful.
Are you an artist?
I want the answer to be yes.
Tell me about your art.
I work with cameras.
Tell me about your art.
I freeze people in time and space.
Tell me about your art.
It’s dizzy.
Do you feel dizzy right now?
I feel completely still.
When will you move?
When my body is not tired anymore.
Are you tired right now?
I will spend the rest of my life tired.
What time do you wake up?
Usually around 9AM.
Are you looking forward to waking up tomorrow?
I always look forward to surviving the night.
Are you ready to quit?
Not yet.
How often do you quit?
More often than I'd like to admit.
When was the last time you felt good?
This morning.
What happened this morning?
I finally let myself cry.
You let yourself cry?
I let myself feel everything that I've been tucking away for later.
And crying made you feel good?
It was like draining an overflowing bathtub.
Do you like to take baths?
I feel too exposed.
So how do you relax?
I sit in the dark.
Are you in the dark right now?
Yes I am.
Why?
Because I'm saving the planet.
Really, Why?
Because the lights are too harsh for my eyes.
Are you still high?
For legal reasons I never was.
Is it smart to write that down?
It would be cheating If I didn’t.
Are you responsible?
Not always.
Why not?
Because it’s overwhelming.
Are you always overwhelmed?
It is my natural state.
What makes you overwhelmed?
School. My family. My friends. Me.
Can you fix it?
I could stop being sad.
Can you fix it?
I could organize my life better.
Can you fix it?
I can stop blaming other people.
Can you fix it?
Only with medicinal help.
Can you fix it?
It's not me that needs a fix.