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And the light in those eyes, the quiet joy… They knocked the breath from me. A future—we would have a future together. I would have a future. A life. (ACOMAF pg537)
How Gwyn’s teal eyes might light upon seeing the necklace. For whatever reason… he could see it. (Az POV)
That’s your future, Azriel.
Bryce asked Nesta, “You have a mate, right?” She nodded to Azriel. “Do you?”
“No,” Azriel said quickly, flatly.
Don’t touch that one, Bryce 😂 it’s best to just leave it alone!
Full Azriel Chapter
This includes the missing page, all in order.
All credit goes to Lola-hollin662 on reddit! My BAM edition still hasn’t come in the mail but the redditor was kind enough to post it.
I'm going back to analyzing the phrase "a thing of secret, lovely beauty" out of boredom but also because I reread the chapter and wanted to write another post about its beautiful symbolism.
Disclaimer: we know the necklace was bought with the intention of giving it to Elain, so saying this specific phrase is meant for Gwyn is not an insult to Elain but it's based on what the text implies. Everything is based on ACOSF and Azriel's chapter.
Let's look at the two scenes where a thing of secret, lovely beauty phrase is used:
Elain sucked in a soft breath that whispered over his skin. His shadows skittered back at the sound. They'd always been prone to vanish when she was around. -- The golden necklace seemed ordinary -- its chain unremarkable, the amulet tiny enough that it could be dismissed as an everyday charm. It was a small, flat rose fashioned of stained glass, designed so that when held to the light, the true depth of the colors would become visible. A thing of secret, lovely beauty. -- “It's beautiful," she whispered, lifting it from the box. The golden faelight shone through the little glass facets, setting the charm glowing with hues of red and pink and white.
Clotho's pen moved once more. She deserves something as beautiful as this. I thank you for the joy it shall bring to her. Something sparked in Azriel's chest, but he only nodded his thanks and left. He could picture it, though, as he ascended the stairs back to the House proper. How Gwyn's teal eyes might light upon seeing the necklace. For whatever reason... he could see it. But Azriel tucked away the thought, consciously erasing the slight smile it brought to his face. Buried the image down deep, where it glowed quietly. A thing of secret, lovely beauty.
For the first scene, I made sure to include a big portion of it for the sake of context. The phrase was not applied to a person the first time, it's applied to an object: the necklace. The beauty of the necklace is a secret. It looks ordinary and can be dismissed as an everyday charm and the chain is unremarkable. Only when you expose the necklace to the light that it's true colors and beauty show.
We know based on the text that this phrase is used for a necklace the first time, so it does not fit with what we know about Elain because her beauty is not a secret it's basically the first thing or first impression anyone learns about her.
“She was jealous of your beauty,” Amren said, an amused smile on her red lips. Elain blushed. “Perhaps.”
“He whispered in her ear, “They say your sister Elain is the beauty, but you outshine her tonight.”
Then Elain’s face appeared over Mrs. Laurent’s round shoulder. Beautiful—she’d always been the most beautiful of us. Soft and lovely, like a summer dawn.
So I find it intentional on SJM's part to use the phrase twice. First time is for an ordinary necklace whose beauty does not show until it's held to the light, and the second time is when Azriel describes the image of Gwyn's joy.
“In the sunlight, the color of her hair was extraordinary, strands of gold glinting, and her teal eyes were a near-perfect match to the stones the other priestesses wore.”
“Gwyn nimbly rolled to her feet, grinning so broadly that Nesta was momentarily taken aback by it. The priestess had been pretty in the library, but with that joy, that confidence as she aimed for the three priestesses, she had emerged into a beauty to rival Merrill or Mor.”
Even Nesta's first impression of Gwyn isn't her beauty since she was under the library, it's only when Gwyn steps into the light that Nesta is struck by how beautiful she is and how extraordinary her hair and eyes look. That's a hidden beauty there, it can be overlooked the first time but once it's under the light her beauty radiates especially when she feels joy.
Another thing to keep in mind is the fact that Gwyn and Azriel spent a short time on Solstice together. During that short time she made him open up a bit about himself, she surprised him, she smiled at his shadows and they reacted to her, she teased him, she made him laugh and he even joked with her and he left the ring settled and calmed down after speaking with her. This all happened in one scene. The main reason why I point this out is because of the fact that we barely get to see many reactions out of Azriel in the books, let alone in one scene.
She said, as much a dismissal as it was a holiday blessing. He snorted. "Are you kicking me out?" ------- Pure amusement glittered in her stare. Better than the pain and grief he'd spied a moment before. So he offered her a crooked smile. "I can't sleep without my favorite dagger." --- Azriel's lips twitched. He refrained from mentioning that he did indeed sleep with a dagger. Many daggers.------- "Do you, though?" she pressed. "Sing?" Azriel couldn't help his soft chuckle. "Yes." ------- Azriel laughed. "I’ll give you that." Gwyn smiled broadly. "Thank you." Azriel dipped his head in a sketch of a bow, something restless settling in him. Even his shadows had calmed. As if content to lounge on his shoulders and watch.
The significance of this scene is the fact that she surprised him and he started to see who Gwyn was versus the Gwyn he rescued two years prior:
He nodded, silence falling. For a heartbeat, their gazes met. He blocked out the bloody memory that flashed, so at odds with the Gwyn he saw before him now. Her head ducked, as if remembering it too. That he'd been the one who'd found her that day at Sangravah. "Happy Solstice," she said, as much a dismissal as it was a holiday blessing.
They fell silent again as Gwyn shifted her feet, angling the blade. The wind waggled the ribbon again, as if taunting her. Cassian glanced over at Az, but his attention was fixed on the young priestess, admiration and quiet encouragement shining from his face.
“Emerie groused, but stepped up to the dangling ribbon, grudgingly taking the sword Cassian extended. Azriel murmured over a shoulder to the priestesses under his charge as they watched. They instantly began moving again. But Azriel’s attention remained on the ribbon.”
His attention is ON Gwyn and not the ribbon she is about to cut versus the scene when Emerie was about to cut the ribbon.
Indeed, Azriel and Cassian had just leaned against the wall, arms crossed, and smiled at them the entire time. Gwyn threw Azriel a withering stare as she strode past him. “See you tomorrow, Shadowsinger,” she tossed over a shoulder. Az stared after her, brows high with amusement. “When he turned back, Nesta grinned. “You have no idea what you just started,” she said. Az angled his head, hazel eyes narrowing as Gwyn reached the archway.
This is why after Solstice you get to see Azriel noticing Gwyn a lot more than he used to.
“Gwyn let out a high-pitched noise that was nothing but pure excitement. Azriel, on the other side of the ring with the rest of the priestesses, half-turned at the sound, brows high.”
You can tell he is amused and perhaps surprised by Gwyn here. He is seeing more of her personality.
Anyhow, I wanted to point out the symbolism and how that ties into Gwyn and Azriel's perception of her.
After all, his chapter ended with him burying the image of her joy in his chest where it's glowing quietly and used the same phrase for the necklace: a thing of secret, lovely beauty.
That can only mean he kept the image to think about maybe from time to time. It's something he found precious enough to keep it in his chest. This image did not spark in him out of the blue, it sparked when Clotho thanked him for giving Gwyn something this beautiful and it will bring her joy.
This is not to belittle anything about Elain but when he gave Elain the necklace he did not make note of any reaction from her, he did not say “she smiled” or that “her eyes lightened upon seeing it”, there was no mention of her reaction to the gift other than calling it beautiful and asking him to put it on her. You'd think he'd admire her smile or eyes because that's one of the things you look for when you give someone a gift: their reaction. Gwyn was not physically there and he literally daydreamed about her reaction to the necklace and it made him smile. It was a conscious action on his part because we are told he had to "consciously" erase the smile off his face.
This is where I find romantic coding for them, it's not the fact that the gift was meant for Elain and he gave it away to Gwyn (we all know Gwyn deserves better than that)—it's the symbolism and what the necklace represented to him: a thing of secret, lovely beauty.
I find it precious that the image of her joy brought a smile to his face and Sarah choosing to end Azriel's Chapter with that has significance.
ELUCIEN:
"Her eyes were the brown of a fawn's coat. And he could have sworn something SPARKED in them as she met his eyes.”
GWYNRIEL:
“Something SPARKED in Azriel's chest, but he only nodded his thanks and left. He could picture it, though, as he ascended the stairs…”
They’re endgame, and none can change my mind.🖤
Okay but hear me out.
I think Elain likes Azriel. But Azriel, I mean he's clearly attracted to her, but I think his feelings stem from 2 reasons
1. Elain's sisters are mated to his brothers. And he wants what they have. Her sisters chose his brothers! Mating bond or no mating bond, This male has been alone and aloof for 500 years, he just wants someone to want him forever. That brings me to my second point
2. Elain shows interest in him. This added to the first point makes him think she's the one.
But. BUT.
I do not think Az's shadows disappearing infront of Mor or Elain is a good thing. They are a part of him. And these 2 females are someone their master has feelings for but (I think) they make the shadows uncomfortable.
And that's nooott a good thing. When we read the parts with Gwyn, there's just soo much chemistry there.
Point number 1. Az is hella competitive and so is Gwyn. Her challenging him is something he finds amusing.
2. Say what you want but I think unknowingly Az is comfortable around Gwyn. His humour comes out around her. She makes him feel lighter.
3. Shadows! His shadows literally touch her breath. And when he leaves her, they're singing. Singing!
On a side note. It's been repeatedly mentioned how Elain doesn't fit well in the Night Court. She's literally described as a Ray of sunshine. Sunshine belongs in the day court!!
Okay. Rant over.
Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.
The fact that almost everyone trashed Elucien because it was supposedly based on Lucien's entitlement over Elain and now reading Azriel acting as if he's entitled to have Elain...
"Lucien is so toxic, he thinks he can force Elain into being his mate!"
You see how Lucien specifically says how he is equally Elain's as she is his? But how Azriel speaks of her like she's a possession? Yeah, look into that.
