This Mother's Day I ended up contemplating my grandmother. My aunt posted about her on Facebook and got several comments about how kind and motherly she was, and I asked to know more because she was cruel to me. My aunt tried to reassure me that Grandma wasn't affectionate but she loved her grandkids dearly. I politely contradicted that I know my own experience, and I know my grandmother loved her grandchildren but she had very specifically excluded me and my brothers, and me most of all.
This was the first time I have viewed this experience with knowledge that I was actually visibly partially handicapped as child, and I realized that the reason I witnessed so much more of my grandmother's and uncle's cruelty is that they spoke in front of me like I wasn't there.
It also explains why one uncle always tormented me by telling me that my mom dropped me on my head when I was baby.
