#bb's fics

[tenderonlytoone]

fandomstuck! hetalia has a nightmare about heta oni and homestuck comforts him. c:

'Hey, hey babe, wake up. Come on, wake up, Hetalia.'

There was a hand, a hand on his shoulder, and it was shaking him. At first he wanted to scream because the hand was grey and grey was bad grey was not good because grey meant oh god please no don’t—

But he looked again and the hand was still grey but there were claws, yellow claws, and he realised who it was. Not it, but him. Not it. Safe.

Hetalia caught sight of Homestuck’s concerned face, silver-edged in the moonlight, and managed a wan smile.

'Oh, hi, Homestuck.'

'You okay? What happened? Did you have a bad dream?'

Homestuck fussed over him, brushing his fringe aside, a hand on his thigh. His hand was warm and firm and real, not cold and grey and dead. Hetalia shut his eyes, tried to push away the images that were flashing in his mind as he began to recall his other’s fate. No, no, no, stop, please.

'Hetalia? Hey, it's okay, you don't have to tell me about it. Here, just…' And then Homestuck was hugging Hetalia close, tucking his head under his chin and running his hands up and down Hetalia's trembling back. Hetalia could hear Homestuck's heart beating by his ear and he listened to it, focused on it, willed his own heart to match Homestuck's as his fingers clung onto the back of Homestuck's shirt.

Homestuck rocked them back and forth slowly, making gentle shoosh-ing noises and kissing Hetalia lightly on the top of his head, saying things like, ‘I’m here, it’s okay, everything will be okay.’

Everything would not be okay. Nothing would ever be okay. But the way Homestuck said it made Hetalia want to believe it could be, so he listened and he believed. When he finally calmed, breathing normal, heartbeat normal, cheeks mostly dry, he pulled back and whispered, ‘I’m better now.’

Homestuck looked at him, night vision making up for the dark room, and asked, ‘You wanna talk about it?’

Hetalia shook his head.

'Tomorrow morning?' Homestuck insisted.

Hetalia nodded.

'Okay.' Homestuck breathed, a sigh of relief, and they both laid down again. Homestuck pulled the blankets up around them and they tangled their limbs together.

'You'll be okay,' Homestuck said, kissing Hetalia's forehead. Hetalia reached up to kiss him on the lips.

He would not be okay. He would never be okay. But Homestuck was here with him right now, solid, warm and alive, so Hetalia listened.

Hetalia believed.

-

I think you were hoping for cute but it ended up creepy-angsty. Ah well.

One does not simply watch Hetaoni and walk away unaffected.

[tenderonlytoone]

And To All A Good Night

Coffee and kisses.

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-

When Homestuck walked back to their table, a cup of steaming coffee in each gloved hand, he found Hetalia sitting with his head lolled over the back of the chair, mouth open as he tried to catch snowflakes on his tongue. He chuckled to himself, and set down Hetalia’s coffee on the table before taking his seat and sipping from his own cup.

The sound of paper cup on glass tabletop jolted Hetalia out of his snowflake-tasting daze, and he looked down at the coffee, before looking up at Homestuck. Smiling broadly, his cheeks were cherry red as he thanked Homestuck. ‘No problem,’ Homestuck shrugged, peeking over the rim of his cup as he watched Hetalia wrap his cold hands around the hot beverage and take a grateful sip from it.

‘I had so much fun today!’ Hetalia declared, licking away the smidge of coffee caught on his upper lip, ‘Thanks for coming out to town with me to look at the Christmas decorations.’

‘It wasn’t a big deal. It’s nice to get off campus once in a while.’ Homestuck replied.

‘Yea! I mean, our dorms look great, but big shopping malls do it on a much grander scale!’ Hetalia said, leaning back again to smile up at the strings of bright blue fairy lights woven through the tree branches overhead.

They had driven into town around noon that day and spent the next three hours wandering along the main retail boulevard to check out each mall’s Christmas decorations. One mall had a mini train ride for kids, another mall had a huge sleigh complete with larger-than-life reindeer and Santa Claus on its roof, but they both agreed that the mall with the best Christmas decorations was the one with a massive, inverted Christmas tree made up of suspended green baubles and ‘topped’ with a glowing gold star that was just out of reach. They took a Dirk-and-Jake style selfie in front of the tree, and Hetalia had kissed him on the cheek as he set the photo as his phone’s wallpaper.

Just then, someone walked out of the café—Hetalia had wanted to sit outdoors even though it was snowing lightly—and a few bars of All I Want for Christmas is You slipped out before the glass door swung shut again. Homestuck took a hurried gulp from his cup as he tried to banish all overly cheesy thoughts from his mind, but in his flustered embarrassment, he’d forgotten how hot the coffee was and winced as the liquid scalded his tongue.

‘Are you okay?’ Hetalia asked, brows furrowed in concern.

‘Fine.’ Homestuck said, even as his tongue simultaneously went numb and was prickled by sharp little stabs of pain.

Hetalia rested his fingers lightly on Homestuck’s wrist, watching Homestuck stick his tongue out in the hopes that the cool air would make it sting less. It didn’t.

‘Are you sure?’

‘Sure I’m sure,’ Homestuck replied, even as his sure sounded more like thure, ‘Got distracted, forgot how hot it is.’

‘What were you thinking about?’ Hetalia asked, head cocked curiously to one side.

‘Umm… I…’ Homestuck’s mouth opened and closed, burnt tongue suddenly forgotten. ‘Ya know, things.’

‘Things.’ Hetalia echoed, a bemused look on his face.

‘Yea. Things.’ Homestuck replied, windswept cheeks starting to turn an even darker shade of green as he looked down at his knees. ‘About… us.’

‘Oh. Us.’ Hetalia repeated, and Homestuck almost melted from how soft and fond and pleased his matesprit had sounded as he shaped that word. Us.

There was a pause before Hetalia gently ran his thumb along Homestuck’s jaw. Homestuck looked up and Hetalia leaned over, kissing him sweetly on the lips. When he pulled back, a loving smile on his face and a tender look in his eyes, Homestuck thought he could cry. He had not believed it was possible to love someone so much, but it was and he did and his heart twisted in the sweetest of ways.

‘I love you.’

The statement—part prayer, part confession—tumbled out before Homestuck could stop himself, but he didn’t regret it, not for a moment, nor would he take it back. The words hung in the air between them, as beautiful and brilliant as the fairy lights overhead, and when Hetalia intertwined their fingers and replied in kind, Homestuck could only squeeze his hand, too overcome by emotion to trust himself to speak.

Hetalia saw the tears brimming in Homestuck’s eyes, the way he bit at the inside of his cheek, and understood everything Homestuck wanted to but couldn’t say. He nodded, squeezing Homestuck’s hand in reassurance, before turning back to watch the harried, last-minute shoppers scuttle by.

The two of them sat there, drinking coffee in comfortable silence, still holding hands as the sky went dark and the stars came out.

It was a beautiful night.

-

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It’s a Christmas miracle! I got a fic out before 2013 ended!

Happy Holidays all! May you have a brilliant rest of the year~ And a brilliant year ahead too. ;D

[tenderonlytoone]

New Kid

You used to look so happy and free when you swim, but today… you looked like you were trying to run away from something.

-

Free didn’t know how long he’d been swimming. He had a tendency to do that; swim for so long that he lost track of time, too caught up in the rhythm of his arms scything through the water. Time didn’t matter when he was in the water. Nothing did.

Which is why he didn’t know how long Hetalia had been sitting by the edge of the pool, bomber jacket missing and baggy jeans swapped out for khaki bermudas. The water splashed gently about his kicking feet and his head was tilted upwards, eyes shut and face serene as he soaked in the late afternoon sun.

Free finished his lap before making his way over to Hetalia. Hearing the change in Free’s methodical strokes, Hetalia opened his eyes and tilted his head in greeting as Free came to rest his crossed forearms on the cool tiles of the poolside.

'Hello Hetalia.' Free said, 'Why are you here?'

'I wanted to check on you.' Hetalia replied.

Now that he was closer, Free noticed the gentle furrow to Hetalia's brow, the slight thinness to his mouth.

'Check on me?' Free flipped his fringe to the side, ran a hand through his hair. 'Why would you need to do that?'

Hetalia bit his bottom lip and averted his eyes. Free knew then why Hetalia was here. He had seen that precise look of melancholy on Hetalia’s face before.

'The others aren't feeling too well,' Hetalia replied softly.

'The others?'

Hetalia nodded. ‘Dangan Ronpa and Titan.’

Free inclined his head in understanding. It was as he suspected.

'They are both trying to be strong, but I can tell, you know?' Hetalia explained as he drew a finger through the little waves that spilled over the edge of the pool. 'Dangan Ronpa insists that she's fine since she has a spin off game coming out next year, and Titan's manga is still going strong, but… well, the end of an anime season is never easy.'

Here was where Hetalia lifted his head to look at Free, and Free was the one who had to look away. He fiddled absentmindedly with the goggles hanging about his neck.

'They will lose quite a few casual fans,' Hetalia continued pensively, 'And who knows what new fandoms will form with the next season of anime? Their Western fans will also focus more on the original Big Three once they make their comebacks.'

It hurt. Free wish it didn’t, but it hurt. He clutched at his chest and lowered his head, hiding his eyes behind his fringe.

'I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that!' Hetalia exclaimed, reaching out clasp Free's other hand.

Free tried to smile reassuringly. ‘No, it’s fine Hetalia.’ He turned his palm upwards so that they were properly holding hands. ‘It’s because you’re worried for them.’

'Of course!' Hetalia said, squeezing Free's hand tightly in his. 'And I'm worried about you too!'

'I'm fine.' Free insisted, but Hetalia didn't believe him. He reached out and pulled Free close, doing his best to hug the other fandom without tumbling into the pool, not caring one bit that his shirt was getting wet in the progress.

'You used to look so happy and free when you swim,' Hetalia murmured against the top of Free's head. 'But today… you looked like you were trying to run away from something.'

'That's probably because my fans are fretting about what it means for Rin to be joining the Samezuka relay team…' Free replied, but even he could tell he was lying. Hetalia made a soft sound, part disbelief and part sadness, and held Free even closer.

Free’s arms came up of their own accord and wrapped tight around Hetalia’s waist. He pressed his face against the damp fabric of Hetalia’s shirt and closed his eyes.

The realisation had hit him after his 6th episode. That week, just like any other week, his friends had gathered in the student lounge and watched his anime with him, even though it was first broadcast in the wee hours of the morning. They had laughed and cheered along with what was showing onscreen as usual, and helped him work off his post-update high energy with a dance competition (Panty’s idea). After he got back to his room though, and sunk into the bathtub he’d gotten installed in the corner, a thought struck him.

Half way through. He was already half way through his anime. His heart clenched and he submerged himself till his nose was hovering just above the water. His anime; it felt like it had barely began, but in six weeks, in less that two months, it was all over.

It wasn’t right for him to complain. At least he got an anime. At least he hadn’t just remained an advertisement. But…The giddy happiness that surged through him whenever there was a sweet moment between his characters, the absurd delight that tickled him all over when someone was being silly and adorable, even the bitter tang of angst that gnawed at his heart whenever he watched one of his characters hurt and grow; he’d gotten so used to it all.

He’d told Hetalia he was prepared to disappear, and he was, but when faced with the looming prospect, fear still stuck and paralyzed him. He didn’t want to think about it. He didn’t want it to end. He didn’t want to go.

'Free.'

Hetalia’s voice jolted him back into the present. He didn’t realise his fingers had been digging into Hetalia’s back. He immediately jerked away and muttered an apology. Hetalia waved it aside and reached out to pull Free close to him again.

Hetalia grabbed Free’s hands in his, knees brushing against Free’s bare torso as he said earnestly, 'I understand if you don't want to talk about it, Free, I really do. But you know that if you ever need someone to listen, I'm here for you, right?'

Hetalia’s eyes were so bright. A beautiful shade of green. Not soft and gentle like Makoto’s, more startling and clear. There were no lies in that gaze, nothing but absolute sincerity and heartfelt empathy, and somehow, it soothed Free.

He gave Hetalia’s hands a small squeeze, nodding slightly, 'I understand.'

Hetalia smiled, before getting to his feet and offering his hand, ‘Come on, let’s go back indoors. I’ll cook dinner. Would you like your usual?’

Free laughed softly and took the offered hand, ‘Yes please.’

Hetalia giggled too as he pulled Free up, ‘Mackerel it is~’

They both walked over to the deck chair where Hetalia had prepared a towel for each of them. As Hetalia wiped at his legs and slipped on his socks and sneakers, Free paused in the middle of toweling dry his hair.

'Hetalia.'

Hetalia looked up from where he was tightening his shoelaces.

'Thanks.'

Hetalia smiled.

'You were there for me when I needed it. It's the least I can do.'

-

‘Thank you for the meal.’ Free said as he put his chopsticks down. ’It was delicious.’

'I'm glad you like it~' Hetalia said. He polished off the last of his pasta - carbonara tonight - and dabbed carelessly at his mouth with a paper napkin, before starting to pile all the plates together.

Free reached out and stopped him. ‘I shall wash the dishes tonight.’

'Alright then, if you insist.'

Free gathered all the used cutlery and utensils into a neat pile and carried it over to the sink where he began to wash up. Hetalia retired to the lounge area and poured himself a glass of wine, taking small sips from it as he set up the game console so he could play with Free when he was done with the dishes.

'Excuse me.'

Hetalia looked up to see a person standing in the pathway that separated the dining area from the lounge area. The fandom had brown hair and brown eyes that were framed by a pair of square, black frames. He looked younger than Hetalia, in his mid teens, and was probably an anime too, since he both looked the part and had spoken in Japanese.

'Oh hello, I don't think I've seen you around before. You must be new!' Hetalia said in greeting.

'Ah, yes, I am.' The other fandom smiled. 'Could you please tell me where I can find a fandom named Free?'

'Free? He's right there.' Hetalia replied, pointing across the room at the dining area.

'Great, thanks!' The new fandom looked excited and turned away before Hetalia could say more.

'Oh! I forgot to ask him what his name was!'

-

'Free?'

Free looked up from the washing up and saw a fandom he’d never seen before standing beside him.

'Can I help you?'

The fandom smiled widely and pushed up his glasses with his thumb and forefinger. 'So you are Free. I finally found you!'

He offered his hand to Free, smiling toothily as he said, 'My name is Meganebu. And I’m here to take your fans.'

-

Sorry lads, no Hetastuck here. I just really wanted to write something on Meganebu, and Free and the other fandoms whose anime was ending soon. And sorry for the shoddy quality too. A few weeks without and my writing deteriorates to this. OTL

And FYI, this was supposed to take place after episode 9 of Free, and Meganebu’s line is a reference to the fact that the Meganebu staff are gunning for the Free demographic.

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[tenderonlytoone]

Greetings, dear followers. Do you, perhaps, like Free? Do you enjoy the pairing of Haruka and Makoto? Do you want a little smexy drabble of the two? Then click the link above and have at it.

[tenderonlytoone]

Free

Swimming Anime is going to become an actual anime! Hetalia helps his friend through his first update shock.

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-

oh my god oh my god oh my god

Swimming Anime sat on his chair, feet pulled against his chest, arms wrapped tight around his knees as he rocked back and forth in shock and happiness.

An anime! He was going to be an actual anime!

He glanced back at the screen of his laptop, at the PV for his anime and his heart fluttered wildly because this was actually happening, he was actually going to have his own show! He wasn’t ‘just an advertisement’ anymore! He wasn’t just a ‘pathetic excuse of a fandom made up of rabid yaoi fangirls.’ He was going to be a real fandom!

His vision suddenly blurred, lines breaking, colours swirling, and Swimming Anime was stunned for a moment as dampness spilled down his cheeks. He lifted a hand and rubbed at his face, looking down at his wet fingers in wonder. He was crying. But why? He wasn’t sad. He was, he was…

Ecstatic! Surprised! Thankful! Afraid! Hopeful!

He was…

A mess of emotions that couldn’t think straight, all he could do was feel, feel the energy thrum through his veins as his fans started creating art and fics and posts and gifs, and their energy flooded him, buoyed him, made his fingers tremble and his limbs buzz and his head spin and oh, this is what it felt like when he was born but so much more intense and so much better and so amazing and wow wow wow, this was too much so good but too much and help, his heart was thundering in the space between his ears and he couldn’t breathe-

‘Swimming Anime! I just heard the news- Are you okay?’

Swimming Anime’s bedroom door was flung open by a cheerful Hetalia who was grinning wildly until he saw his friend trembling and crying. Hetalia hurried over, kneeling by Swimming Anime’s side.

‘Hey, hey, you’re going to be okay.’ Hetalia immediately adopted the soothing tone he normally used with Homestuck. Calming down update-wild fandoms was second nature to him now. ‘Breathe, come on, breathe for me.’ Hetalia laid a hand on Swimming Anime’s bare arm, rubbed at his feverish skin. ‘Breathe, come on, that’s it, open your mouth and breathe.’ Swimming Anime finally took in a gasping, shivery breath and Hetalia sighed in relief.

‘Look at me, Swimming Anime, look at me.’ Hetalia cooed, sliding his hand up and down Swimming Anime’s arm until the other fandom turned his eyes to his. Hetalia smiled comfortingly, ‘Come on now, relax your body, yes, that’s it, that’s good, that’s right, here, hold my hand, good, good, bene, wunderbar,’ Hetalia murmured as he slowly, carefully, coaxed Swimming Anime to release his vice grip on his knees, to hold onto his hands instead, to put his feet back on the ground and uncurl his tense body. ‘That’s it, Swimming Anime, that’s it.’ Hetalia murmured as he dabbed away the tears still spilling from Swimming Anime’s eyes with the collar of Swimming Anime’s unbuttoned white shirt.

‘Free.’ the younger fandom suddenly croaked out.

‘What?’

‘My name.’ he said firmly, scrubbing his forearm across his face. His deep blue eyes focused on Hetalia’s green. ‘My name is Free.’

Hetalia smiled. ‘Yes, of course it is. Free.’

Free stared at Hetalia defensively, challenging - and he didn’t know why, it didn’t make sense, Hetalia had been nothing but nice to him - before a wave of weariness crashed down on him and he slumped back in his chair, head lolling over the back to stare at the ceiling.

Hetalia got back onto his feet and carefully maneuvered Free out of his chair and onto his bed. He settled down next to Free, letting the other fandom lean against him, looping an arm around Free’s waist to keep him upright. Hetalia waited patiently for his friend to calm down, humming a soothing tune against Free’s temple as he felt the sweat cooling on Free’s skin, felt the Free’s ribs shift against his sides with every deep breath Free gulped down.

‘I’m having an anime.’ Free finally mumbled, dazed.

‘That’s right, Free.’ Hetalia agreed, squeezing Free’s torso for a brief moment. ‘You’re going to be an anime.’

‘Yea. Yea, I am.’ Free said slowly. ‘I can’t believe it. I’m… I’m going to have my own anime.’ Free lifted his head, turned to look at Hetalia, eyes bright as stars, voice growing with volume and passion with every sentence. ‘I’m… I’m not going to die. I’m not going to die, Hetalia, I’m going to live. I’m not just a fad! I’m not going to fade away! I’m going to live!’

Hetalia laughed merrily. ‘Yes, yes, you are are Free! You’re going to make it! You’re going to be an anime!’ He shifted to give Free a proper two armed hug, chin resting in the curve of Free’s shoulder as he crowed, ‘I’m so happy for you!’

Free returned the hug enthusiastically, clutching Hetalia’s body close as he rambled. ‘Did you see, did you see the PV, did you see it? My characters? Did you see them? I have five now, not four! And they look so good, so amazing, so real!’ Free pulled away, a wild, manic smile on his face as he continued. ‘And they have voices.’ Free wrapped his hand around his throat in wonder. ‘Real voices! They can speak! Just like me!’

‘Yes, Free, I did see it! You have five characters and they look incredible! Congratulations!’

‘Thank you.’ Free laughed, relieved, alive, free, the weight on his shoulders lifted and flung into the sea. He was going to live, he was going somewhere, he was going to grow instead of fading away!

‘Thank you. No, really, thank you, Hetalia, I mean it.’ Free repeated, grabbing Hetalia by the shoulders, trying to be serious despite the happy buzz still fizzing throughout his body. ‘Thank you for sticking by me even though I was just an advertisement.’

‘A fandom is a fandom, Free. It doesn’t matter what of.’ Hetalia said, rubbing his hand up and down Free’s forearm again. ‘As long as you have fans, you are a fandom.’

So warm, Free reflected, Hetalia’s hand was so warm even though his own flesh was warm too, borderline hot even, hot in a way it never used to be, but would continue to be now because he had an anime, oh heavens, he had an anime!

‘I was so jealous!’ Free blurted out. 'Of you, of Kuroko’s, of Ouran, of Black Butler!’ He released Hetalia, hands falling into his lap, head bowed in embarrassment. ‘You had animes and movies and live action series and musicals, and I was just an advertisement…’

‘Well you’re not ‘just an advertisement’ now Free, even though there’s nothing wrong with that.’ Hetalia gave Free’s bicep a gentle squeeze. ‘You’re going to be an anime!’

‘Yes, yes, I am.’ Free grinned, lifting his head again. The world seemed to spin around him and orbs of lights flickered in and out of his vision. ‘Oh god, Hetalia, how do you handle… this?’ Free gestured helplessly. ’All this emotion and energy and feeling?’ There was fire roaring through his bones, lightning up his spine and static in his fingertips. His heart drummed a harsh rhythm against his heaving ribcage, and his chest felt stuffed full of light. ‘Does it always feel like this? When you… you update?’

Update. Free savored the way the word tasted in this mouth. He had an update.

‘Sometimes.’ Hetalia smiled in understanding. ‘The first time is usually the most memorable, if not the most intense.’ Hetalia carded his fingers through Free’s smooth hair tenderly, slid them down to caress his flushed cheeks briefly. ‘Just wait till the translators get to work.’ Hetalia added with a grin. ‘You’ll feel even more when the non-Japanese fans realise what’s going on.’

‘It’ll get even more intense?’ Free asked, eyes wide in apprehension and anticipation.

Hetalia laughed lightly. ‘Don’t worry, you’ll get used to it,’ he promised.

‘Yea.’ Free smiled broadly, giddy with delight. ‘Yea, I guess I will, won’t I?’

He could get used to it because he was going to have more updates.

Because this wasn’t a one time thing.

He wasn’t a one time thing.

‘I’m going to be an anime, Hetalia.’ Free repeated, softly now, confidently.

Hetalia leaned in to kiss him on the cheek. ‘I’m so happy for you, Free,’ Hetalia breathed as he intertwined his fingers with Free’s and gave them a quick squeeze. ‘You’re going to be an anime.’

-

Guys, I am so excited for Free! This is turning out to be a great year! 

Note: I do have a few other Fandomtalia fics outlined involving Swimming Anime/Free set at an earlier date, but haven’t had the time to work on them and post them, so if the two fandoms seem weirdly close here, it’s because in my head, they’ve been through a few things that makes them good friends.

These here are the two other fics I've posted involving Swimming Anime/Free.

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