hi, i saw your post on diety! if you want a more concrete yes/no answer, it might help to ask is the hesitancy coming from you or the deities?
i'll admit that i've never really initiated reaching out to gods bc of social anxiety and fear lol, but i sometimes sense deity energies around me without knowing anything at first.
for example, just yesterday i woke up at 5am out of the blue, and soon heard the first round of ceremony/celebration music coming from nearby temples. took a morning shower and went to the bookstore, kept picking up and putting down all sorts of different Taiwanese deity books (not the type of books i usually go for), but ultimately didn't read them. came home to a pilgrimage parade near the place i lived, got curious? and stopped to watch until it passed. did some bedtime instagram scrolling, saw a friend's story about the pilgrimage near her home. turned out it was 城隍爺's (the City God, a god that protects amd watches over people, especially those living in a village/cities, and also manages affairs of guiding the newly dead to afterlife) birthday and all my out of character decisions suddenly made sense.
i didn't even realize this until now, but he probably wanted to guide me on how to properly, politely, and safely contact the newly dead temporarily residing in his underworld, bc I uh, got mischievous some time ago and recklessly "descended into the underworld" to chat with someone's deceased dog 🤪 it's probably like illegally boarding a plane and entering places without visa, i did pay the fines in a low grade fever lol.
sorry for the tangent. the point is, i would've learned the knowledge the City God wishes to pass down to me had i let down my guard, overcame my socially awkward self, and just READ THAT BOOK. the avoidance and wariness yesterday was 100% mine, also some subconscious guilt i guess, because i did behave like a delinquent and trespassed 🤣🙈
it's alright tho! the City God isn't mad at me, and he's still trying to reach out to me by guiding me to this post. i'll def go read that book some other day when i feel called to.
i feel like it's very human to assume that deities or ancestors or spiritual beings are perpetually mad/frustrated with us for our eff ups, and then get wary around gods based on these assumptions, but these are usually just the ramblings of a harsh inner critic. the only reason that i can think of, if some deity is hypothetically hesitant about working with you, is that they sense an on duty! inner critic, so it's just not the right time and state to start doing diety work.
good luck on working with gods, it might not be easy peasy, 50% of the energy might be spent on clarifications, but deity work and fun are not mutually exclusive. it will always brings a real sense of fulfillment in the end 🍀
No but you are actually right. The second maybe was definitely more no leaning, which in hindsight it could be because there was definitely some hesitation from me about working with deities bc I don't consider myself good enough at readings to communicate with a literal god. But still there could be more to it, so I'll be sure to ask more about in my next reading. Also your story is wild, I really hope you are doing better after that fever lol.
I'm really glad that we ended up helping each other! 💕