It is certainly possible to believe that Bosie was not a good match for Wilde and that he could have done much better for himself. They fought and broke up and came back together time and time again, but many couples relate this way. It would have been the easiest thing in the world for Wilde to say, “Your father is making my life hell and this relationship is not worth it.” He wasn’t willing to do that. Through all sorts of external pressure and private conflicts of their own, they were determined to stick together. With Oscar Wilde and Bosie Douglas we call this destructive obsession. Yet in a straight couple wouldn’t we call it something else? Wouldn’t we call that commitment?
A “Destructive” Love Affair: Empathy for Lord Alfred Douglas