#beeupdates

[bleedingheartclub]

I don’t know why my hunger feels so insatiable lately. I eat like I don’t know where my next meal is coming from. they say that binging and restricting are two sides of the same coin but lately it’s just all binge for me. any attempt I make to drop into a deficit only pulls me back into maintenance. I’ve gained 8 pounds since I hit my low weight in February and I feel totally out of control

[beeindaclouds]

Bee Update!

So...hello :D

I have some good news ans bad news

Bad news, I decided to completely delete my Alice in Borderland series. It was just not going nowhere and didn't interest many people, so I'be decided to take it off.

I'm not sad or dissapointed or anything, I liked the idea but it was harder to execute them I thought it was gonna be, so deleting it qas the best choice. And, who knows, I might write ot again one day ^^

Now, good news, requests will reopen on Monday! I just have to take a small 3 day break to get my ideas right and prepare the requests I have in my inbox :)

Hope you all have a good morning/afternoon/evening/night 🩵

[bleedingheartclub]

fragile lately

[beeindaclouds]

The Fanfiction That Is, My Life lmao-

/slight vent, ig

Ok, so, I don't usually talk about "love" or "crushes" when it comes to my life [cause I don't have a love life haha], but recently something happened and I'm just so surprised by it!

[Istg this whole situation seems like a fanfiction]

So, in highschool I was in a long distance relationship w/ an American guy, so for like 2 year I wasn't available to anyone lmao- then we broke up, but whatevs

After the break up I had a crush on one fo my friends, we'll call him Dave, but he always treated me like a sister so I never thought about it more then a "secret crush" let's say

I'n usually pretty clingy to all of my friends, but only them cause I'm a shy b*tch irl, but with him any kind of physical contact seemed intentional and always started by him. Like the amount of times he would make me sit on his lap in train, cause there were no seats available, couldn't be counted on 2 hands

The last encounter I had with him, before the inevitable distance of 2020, was when we went out alone for the first time. Things... certainly happened [like imagine a slow burn scene of the main characters finally acting upon their feelings but not giving in], we both literally showed our hearts on our sleeves that day, but went on to act like nothing happened

A few weeks, if not months I don't actually remember, later was when we completely stopped talking. My crush for him was more present at the time, but he got a girlfriend and literally texted me about it, so I go jealous and stopped talking to him completely. Looking back, it was pretty childish of me...but at the time it seemed like the only way for me to cope with these unreciprocated feelings

We started talking again this year, I texted him out of nowhere and we became friends again.

And then the other day happened...

He may have drunk a little too much and let out all of the thoughts he had about me. How he had always liked me but didn't want to ruin my past relationships, how he was about to confess on our last hang out but held back cause I was about to move away from Italy, and other mushy lovey things...

Since then we haven't talked. I'm scared he's gonna take everything back, or tell me that it's a joke or something worse

So now I'm just... waiting? Worrying? Idk, this whole situation seems like a scenario from a book 🙈

Moral of the story: if you ever wanna confess, just do it or you'll regret it.

[beeindaclouds]

Little life update, I got another cat!

My mom went to the temple behind our house and stumbled upon this small orange cat. She immediately fell in love with him and asked if we should adopt it, to which me and my dad agreed on

We went to search for him yesterday, but he was nowhere to be seen. So we went today and we got him! He was hiding in the temple's kitchen, which is a private area where we can't enter, that's why we didn't find him before

But ok, here's Som! Which means "orange" in thai

Tiger, my other cat, is still getting used to having another cat around him. It might take a while, obviously, but I'm sure they'll get along soon enough!

[bleedingheartclub]

🎀 oopsies 🎀

[bleedingheartclub]

last night we were near my favorite ice cream place so I convinced my boyfriend to go with me after dinner but he made a joke about my binge eating so I just drove us straight home 🫠

[bleedingheartclub]

honestly I think where I’m going wrong is not planning out my meals each day cause then I just end up eating anything and everything as soon as I want it