#before high school

[heyythrre]

whats it like to have now hear me out here friends

[shaddy24]

I’m really scared. 

I’m trying to improve, to be more adult, to push forward with my life. I’m getting set to move out and stop relying on friends and family to carry me, I’m working 2 jobs to make sure I’m stable enough to support myself. It’s getting in the way of my games with friends and such, and I’m sacrificing that to maintain my stability.

And all of this is making me feel less and less like I’m in control of my life. It’s also getting in the way of my relationship. TJ and I basically work opposite schedules now; he’s at work before I wake up and goes to bed before I get home from work. We sometimes have a little time in the middle of the day where we’re both online to spend time together, but that’s not much. I don’t know what to do about this, especially because I’m going to be starting on working 7 days a week this week. Between work and trying to get myself moved into my own place, I’m not going to have much spare time to spend with him.

I’m really worried that I’m going to fuck this all up. That I’ll fuck up my stability, fuck up my future and job opportunities and be left with nothing. That I’ll give up my relationship and friendships for work and then lose that. That it will all have been a waste. And I really don’t want to dump this on my friends and family because everyone’s already done so much for me. How much more do I need people to drag me along and bail me out.

I’m struggling a bit with my gender identity. I’m doing better than I was, but it’s still really difficult. I feel kind of dysphoric about my body. It comes and goes. When it’s on it can be pretty overwhelming. When it’s off, I start doubting it was ever real. 

I’m not getting my depression treated properly. I need to get onto that again. 

I’m complaining here because I know I have friends that will read this. It’s stupid because I could just talk to them, but that would be “bad.” It would be “unfair” to them. I don’t know. It doesn’t’ even make sense to me and I’m the one doing it.

I’ve got a plan: get an apartment. Get all my information properly transferred over to my new address; healthcare, ID, etc. Get a doctor and use that to start dealing with my depression properly again. I have free time during the day where I can work on these. My main job doesn’t start until 2 pm.

I’m slowly working on original D&D content to publish. It’s a big project. I want to get it done, but I feel like I’m fooling myself.

I’m a wreck and I still can’t believe that people love me and care for me and help me. 

I’m scared when everyone else will realize that they’re wasting their time.

[orcelito]

drinking pomegranate aloe water. and it tastes just like how my favorite pomegranate perfume scent smells. its ? a little strange. 

[baronvonriktenstein]

If TokyoPop got Saiyuki in 2004, that means this year I’ll have probably been in the fandom for a dozen years.

[andyy-l]

(via https://soundcloud.com/jakobgreen/downtown?utm_source=soundcloud&utm_campaign=share&utm_medium=tumblr)

[goldshitter]

when i read i need to be in a specific state of mind or the words go over my head and make no sense.  if i dont read it "right" i need to reread it over and over and over again til it feels right. i need to be able to visualize it or something. it takes effort and i dont want to go through that effort for some things

[merlinsbed]

The Legend of the Pharaoh

Once upon a time about three thousand years ago in the great land of Egypt, there lived a great pharaoh by the name of Atem. He had the greatest, most powerful dick in all the land. In fact, Pharaoh Atem’s dick was so great, that they had to build a gigantic pyramid palace full of magic, just to hold it together. It was called, The Great Penis Pyramid Palace. One night High Priest Akunadin, Pharaoh Atem’s uncle, awoke with a start. He gazed out his window, which framed the Penis Pyramid Palace, and thought. “You know what,” he said out loud to the empty air around him, “I think I shall destroy my nephew’s dick tonight in the name of Porno the Perverted One!” And with those evil thoughts in his head he got up and left to go assemble the asscheeks of Egypt. Around an hour later, Akunadin and his army of asscheeks arrived at The Great Penis Pyramid Palace of Pharaoh Atem’s dick. “Now my asscheeks!” Akunadin declared, “Destroy my nephew’s Penis Pyramid Palace!” “Yes sir!” The asscheeks sprinted forward, using their assy magic, to create asscracks in the gigantic monument. Finally, after three hours of hard labor and lots of assy gassy magic, The Great Penis Pyramid Palace fell. A few miles away in the royal palace, Pharaoh Atem was sleeping peacefully. Suddenly, the young king felt a sharp pain in a certain area and shot up in bed screaming, “HOLY FUCK! MY DICK JUST BROKE!” Mahado, having heard his king’s screams, burst into the room, millennium dildo (which he had just been using) in hand. “My Pharaoh!” he cried, “What is wrong!” Atem stood from where he had been sitting on the large comfy bed and pointed to a pile of shards of something at his feet. Mahado looked closer and nearly fainted when he saw what it was: Pharaoh Atem’s dick. The priest quickly dashed from the room. Atem meanwhile, moaned in pain. After all, it wasn’t too pleasant having your dick broken. He lay back down on the bed, careful not to disturb his dick shards. Of all the fucking things that could have fucking happened to him his fucking dick had to fucking break in the middle of the fucking night. Fate must fucking hate him…….fuck. After about ten minutes, in which Atem had realized he was slowly dieing, Mahado came back in carrying a strange golden box. “Mahado, what the hell is that thing?” “It’s a box, my Pharaoh.” “I can see that, but what’s it for?” “It’s for your dick shards.” “There was a box specially made for my dick shards?” Mahado didn’t answer. Instead, he held up the millennium dildo and said, “I hereby name this poor shattered dick, the millennium dick!” Atem watched as a bright light shown throughout the room. Suddenly, he felt as if his soul was being ripped from his body, but as soon as the feeling had come, it was gone, to be replaced by darkness. I bet many of you are wondering what has happened to our dear Pharaoh Atem. Well, to make a long story short, Atem was sealed inside his own dick, now the millennium dick, and Mahado stuck all the dick shards in the golden box and buried it in Atem’s tomb. And so ends the great tale of Pharaoh Atem, the man with the greatest dick to ever live. The End May the Pharaoh’s dick be in your pants forever...

[sunyatashawty]

Once upon a time, you were my best friend, and I'd grovel at your feet, and you'd ignore me to no end.