#being sus

[thefunnybunny666]

Cherry ⋆｡‧˚ʚ 𓊆ྀི🍒𓊇ྀི ɞ˚‧｡⋆

[yes-i-would-like-to-be-stabbed]

Chrysoprase using her powers (colored)

[e17omm]

Headache was fun and helped me work on my fanfics but now its not fun and it sucks a lot.

I think I got sick

Whats the point of being sick while on break?

I just wanna watch anime

[foxie-herminah]

Why are you whispering you’re gonna change the shortcut?

Why is Alt gonna be unavailable? It was fine before so what happened?

You’re being shady here Tumblr...

Is Alt gonna be okay?

What’s gonna to happen to Alt?

Tumblr! What’s gonna happen to ALT??

*ᴱ ᵉᵛᶦˡ ˡᵃᵘᵍʰˢ ᶦⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ᵈᶦˢᵗᵃⁿᶜᵉ*

[chillfakedeepstuff]

wsup fam today i was reading this book “No Way Out” i had to return after months of it sitting untouched next to the green couch. the book is the product  of the author’s visits to an (anonymous) hood in the northeast over seven years. the study started as a way to collect evidence as an expert witness in an accessory to murder case, but expanded into a larger ethnographic research project about social dynamics in isolated communities of extreme poverty.

one important thing Dr. Duck stated which i liked is about the oft-used phrase “culture of poverty” which outsiders, usually white, describe poor people as living chaotically -- with hella trash, deserted homes, and other indicators of poverty. his point is that the “culture” is a consequence of the environment, not the cause of the environment. rather than holding individuals accountable we should look for systematic ways in which these communities were established and are held in place by racist housing policies, welfare reform, and shitty schools. further, that the hood operates with it’s own set of independent rules of trust, commitment, and other social factors, in response to the poverty. and, that this social structure is fairly advanced and well defined.

several general rules he laid out struck me from my own, very limited experience living on Holman. one: people talk. never in my life have i been greeted so much, so frequently. even when people hadn’t seen me around before. several people went as far to give me nicknames, like, immediately.  and, two: he spends some time discussing how drug dealers in isolated communities differ from their depiction in popular media and also in major cities. in isolated poverty, everyone knows where people are selling drugs and who those people are -- they are embedded in the community. as Dr. Duck writes, there are appropriate times to make eye contact and times where it should be avoided. i am sure he goes deep into these dynamics in the book, i regret not picking it up sooner.

i am a tall, affluent white man. i am also only living in third ward for a few years and have the ability to leave at any time. i know that the extreme privilege those things bring me affects these social dynamics in ways i do not fully understand and am always learning about. i try to be very visible but respectful that it is not my space. i don’t know a better way to go about living there, except that i should volunteer or work in third ward if i plan to stay there longer term and probably should have started up somewhere when i moved there.

my privilege got pointed out to me twice yesterday and both times i felt the super entitled, defensive susness rearing up in my brain. one time out of the two, i did react defensively and oh wow do i regret it. it is not my place to ever ever ever feel hurt by someone helping me recognize ways in which things are much easier for me than for them.