#berri rants

[berriblossom]

OK! Little list here hehe!

My favorite witch will be finished TODAY finally omg (about a 1.1k chapter)

Already planning chapter 12 & 13 of Till Death Do us Part!

And I am planning another seriee....that I may post the masterlist and first chapter (been rotting in my drafts) maybe today...OoOoo be about yourselves

->I felt so stagnant the last few weeks, just staring at my screen and being like "man...I wanna write that.."

[berriblossom]

At 37 pity and a guarantee pull for Lohen (i lost on Nicole banner)

PLEASE HOYO LET ME PULL HIM EARLY PLEASE, HE ISN'T HERE YET ON AMERICA SERVERS! PLEAAASEEE

[berriblossom]

If you saw me post the next chapter with zero words and a few tags! NOOOO YOU DID NOT, SHHH

Tumblr keeps posting ny drafts when I just want to save them wtf, so I have to private the post my goodness ugh, hopefully the tags did not actually tag anyone yet or else its just an empty post lol

[berriblossom]

Man the urge to write Gaming content is growing stronger, but nooo, nooo I can't do two series at once anymore...not that talented

I want to so badly. Childhood friends to lovers with Gaming, hell through in the "i already knew I loved you from the moment I met you" Type of love and care.

HES SO SWEET AND CUTE TOO GOD DAMMIT.😭

[berristreasuredlibrary]

TW: mentions of bodily fluids (vomit), mention of doctors + rant

I feel so sick it’s not even funny. I wanted to write but I’ve got the biggest headache ever and I want to puke my guts out so bad.

I also am in just such a shitty mood?? Like I just feel absolutely horrible about myself and my capabilities. I know I’m good at things - I’m struggling to find what exactly - and I know that if I really try and apply myself, I can gain new skills, but it’s like there’s this fog blocking me from actually doing so.

I honestly just feel so lost and burdened by everything and nothing at the same time. It’s so infuriating. I’m absolutely infuriated and disappointed in myself. How can I say I love writing when I can’t even put out a few pieces on my blog??

How can I say that I know what my plan is and yet I don’t follow through? I’m so hypocritical about everything. I have resources and I don’t use them. I know there are people who can help me but I don’t ask for help when the need arises. I have friends and family and people who care about me - I know this - but I am just so angry with myself that it feels like the only thing I’ll ever be is a huge disappointment.

I dunno, maybe this is a sign for me to schedule an appointment with my doctor and get help, but I doubt I’ll even be able to force myself to do something as simple as that.