Except from LGBT book I’m working on
Maybe they would be okay.
The smell of fresh hay filled the room. There was only one horse left in the stables, a deep maroon mare. She threw her head and nickered when the two boys.stumbled in, nearly tripping over each others feet. Jack held Ellis’ hand tightly, his face nearly as red as the horse’s hide. He pulled him out of view, then backed him up against one of the rough wooden walls.
Ellis was nervous, his right hand intertwined with Jack’s, and his left placed firmly on his chest. They kissed again, while Ellis’ mind drew a blank. He’d never really kissed anyone he’d truly loved.
But was that what this was about? Filling a gap? Checking something off his bucket list? Hell, he could’ve gone into town for that. Done exactly what his cousin, Allison, does every other weekend- have a nice little one night stand and never see the other person’s face again.
He didn’t know whether or not he really wanted to have a boyfriend, especially one he’d hated for so long. One that he’d fantasized about killing rather than kissing. Especially one who probably was a liar. Who probably had an ulterior motive to this.
Jack tried to lean in farther, but Ellis’s hand gripped his shirt. His breath was picking up. He wasn’t kissing back anymore.
Jack stopped then, pulling back. He took a deep breath, frustrated, but he didn’t let Ellis see that.
“Sorry...” He muttered.
Ellis let go of him, dropping his hands to his sides. He sank down to the floor, letting out a sigh.
“No- I- it’s just...a bit..fast..” Ellis looked away. “I- I’m not going to be good…”
“What are you talking about?” Jack asked, unsure if he should try and comfort him. He wanted to. He wanted to hold him and assure him that everything would be fine. But he knew that was the opposite of what Ellis wanted. Ellis wanted his personal space, his privacy, and to be left alone with his flowers.
“I’m not going to be a good...boyfriend..” Ellis strained like it was hard for him to say. “I’ll never be.”
“Don’t say that,” Jack kneeled down to him. “I’ve been in love with you since the day I met you.”
You’ve been in love with a lie, then. Ellis’ thoughts filled in. Do you think you could ever love the truth?
“I- um..” Ellis nearly spilled, then he decided to cut it off. “It’s..It’s twelve, we should get to class. And no gay shit in public, either. I have a reputation to maintain.”
“Fuck. It’s twelve? I guess it would be World Lit, then.” Jack let the subject change go. He was lucky to get close to him, let alone kiss him like that. “Maybe we could work on the homework togeth-” Jack started, but Ellis abruptly pushed himself to his feet, brushing the hay from his clothing.
“No fucking way. Don’t even think about it. I’m not working with you.” His icy blue eyes met Jack’s hazel ones, making Jack blush again. “That’s how rumors start. If anyone asks, you’re still- you know- just my roommate, and I still hate you with every fiber of my being.”
Jack wasn’t exactly surprised. Here he was, the cynical, snarky boy he’d fallen in love with, ditching him, yet again.
[A/N: Just a small excerpt from my novel project I’m working on. Ellis is actually trans, meanwhile, Jack actually believes he’s responsible for the disappearance of a missing girl. It’s a vampire enemies-to-lovers type story, with a lot of mystery, suspense, and other goodies. I’ll update this as much as I can!]
Thanks for reading!