#big red blend

[tasdoeswine]

90+ Cellars Big Red Blend 

This was a good wine that did not disappoint for a budget wine. 

7/10

[thisischrisbarlow]

Chris Tries to Review Wine: Dark Horse Big Red Blend

Dark Horse Big Red Blend ($7.99 at Trader Joe's Wine Shop, Union Square)

It's not just a red blend. It's a BIG red blend. It even comes in a slightly-larger-than-usual bottle (though tragically it contains a normal amount of wine). It's SO big it doesn't even have a vintage. Is it from 2011? 1923? 2064?

Smell: BIG! Like BIG fruits! Like, uh, GRAPEFRUIT. No wait, that’s not right. Like if you had a grape the size of a grapefruit. Or like a shoved a plum onto my nose like some kind of fruit-themed clown or live-action edible arrangement.

Taste: ALSO BIG. So big I can’t even tell what I’m tasting. I’m envisioning more big purple fruits that don’t exist. In fact the biggest purple fruit I’ve been able to think of is an eggplant, which is actually a vegetable member of the nightshade family. Now please excuse me while I google “nightshade” for the rest of this glass.

No, wait! There's no time–– my HBO Go is almost done buffering! Which means I'm mere minutes away from Optimizing Video! My favorite Sunday shows will be streaming into my home any minute hour now!

This post guaranteed to be spoiler free!

This hearty, full-bodied first glass will prepare me for both the winter which I’m told is coming *and* the episode of Silicon Valley immediately after this.

OMG FAKE LANGUAGES! I need to drink more.

Glass Two: Still watching Game of Thrones

New rule. Drink a glass of wine every time Cersei drinks a glass of wine. Proceed to regret this decisio

[My written notes stop there, but this is what I imagine it looked like:]

And I looked like this:

Pictured: Actual snapchat I sent myself. For realsies.

Or we can turn to the video!

Final Score: I can only give it 3 corks out of five because I had to rewatch Last Week Tonight the next day to figure out if I had really watched it or just dreamed about watching it.*

[*PS–– It's hilarious. The whole first episode is on YouTube here. Watch it.]

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