Apr 7, 2024
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Germany
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Australia
seen from Germany
seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Spain
seen from Türkiye
seen from China
seen from China
seen from Malaysia
seen from Philippines
seen from Malaysia
seen from China
Dysphoria is so crazy sometimes because tell me why I almost started crying because my name, Adam, felt too feminine.
Like brother that is the name of The First Man. How is that too feminine.
Anyways, quick reminder that dysphoria can be illogical sometimes, and that’s normal and okay! I’ve sobbed for hours before because I have an extreme fear that I’ll never pass as a cis man, despite having not been misgendered in over two years as a trans man living in the South. It will be okay. People will see you as a genuine, standard issue guy. You are not alone, and you got this brother.
TME/TMA language is really useful. People who say it's bad because it describes a binary don't know what they're talking about.
If you want to talk about an actual harmful binary that people shouldn't be using?
Binary Trans
There's no such thing as a binary trans person. The gender binary does not actually exist and trans people that do not call themselves non-binary are not reinforcing it.
Funny how I never see the people who rail against TME/TMA language talking about that.
I am not saying that the transmasculine, transfeminine, and transneutral trinary was a good thing, but at least it was something of an attempt at inclusion.
But everybody made such a fuss about it that its common use went away as quickly as it came.
And now we are at transmasculine and transfeminine. By which people always mean trans men and trans women. If they didn't, then these would not be used as synonyms. And most of them clearly mean binary trans men and binary trans women at that.
But people don't complain about this binary nearly as much as they did a trinary.
It says a lot that when faced with the issues that came from a gender trinary, people just went back to a binary!
Okay, listen, this is in no way meant to be snide towards people who are rightfully being inclusive, but when I see post that talk about accepting or supporting certain trans people, there is absolutely going to be some people saying "support everyone".
That's not a bad thing!! It is for sure something Ive noticed in my trans positivity posts though. One of my posts that has gone around the most is the one about how trans activism shouldn't stop at x group. And people rightfully reply with "trans activism shouldn't stop at any group" or sometimes even wonder why I made a whole list when I couldve just said that.
Here's the thing y'all. It's because everyone disagrees on who trans people are. If someone says "support all trans people", they could really mean just binary trans people because non binary people arent trans in their book. Or they could mean just white people, because they dont bother looking at poc perspectives. Or they could mean just abled people, or perisex people, or gender conforming people, and so on and so forth.
If I said "support all trans people, your trans activism shouldn't stop at anyone, full stop" someone could've thought that meant transIDs too. People who call themselves transrace or transabled.
I made a post about how generalization against trans women in discussions of transandrophobia is bad, and people rightfully reply with "generalization against any group of people is bad". And lie, yes, agreed! But what others consider "people" is unfortunately not universal. Generalization against a group of people can be bad to someone, until it's trans people. Until it's trans women, or trans men, or intersex people, or non binary people. Until it is black people, or muslims, or jews, or atheists or pagans. Until it is disabled people, neurodivergent people, poor people, and so on and so forth.
Sometimes in seeing those comments it sounds like "why did you spend effort make a whole list lol you couldve just said everyone", it's not what people mean but it's kind of missing the point and not recognising why I made that effort.
We talk about specific things so others cant pretend to not have heard. They cant project their bias onto our words and keep on going w their lives thinking they're in the right. "Respect everyone" lets them do that. "Love trans women" lets them do that. Not only that, but it makes the people the post is supposed to uplift wonder if they're part of it. Do they count in the eyes of everyone agreeing? Or are they, for example, the "wrong type" of trans woman? Is the post supporting them, and are the people agreeing their allies, or do most of them ignore that they exist? Maybe the post is only about feminine trans women, because masculine ones arent considered really trans women, so no one thought to specify it.
*That* is why I make and reblog long-winded post that specify to support truly everyone. I hope this doesn't offend anyone but it's been on my mind for a while and I wanted to get it out.
Transmascs: are you nonbinary?
No, I’m a binary trans man
No, I’m not a binary trans man but I also don’t identify with the term nonbinary
Yes, I’m a nonbinary trans man
Yes, I’m masculine aligned or solarian nonbinary
Yes, I’m unaligned nonbinary
Yes, I’m nonbinary in another way
Other / unsure
See results / not transmasc
I love characters that use any/all pronouns or multiple sets but when people only refer to them by one set of pronouns 💔
*sees character(canonically uses any pronouns) portrayed by someone who was born what they perceive to be female* “I think SHES so cool and I want HER to be real so SHE could be a GIRL boss like an icon of a WOMAN I love HER” *sees someone refer to him by anything else* “SHE HER WOMAN GIRL”
like yes she uses she/her but not exclusively 😭 that’s also a he and a they and an it call them by other pronouns 😭
“oh but she uses all pronouns” so don’t use one set exclusively?? there’s a difference between like she/any vs any/all.
in contrast, when people(especially binary trans people, gnc people, and trans women) will say “hey I use these pronouns” and then people exclusively use they/them also pisses me off. I have a friend who’s a trans girl and everyone refers to her by they/them.
like hey that person literally just said it uses it/its, even if you think that’s weird to call someone. that trans girl just said she uses she/her. that trans guy just said he uses he/him. I know he hasn’t medically transitioned and YOU think he just looks like a girl with short hair but he just told you his pronouns. that gnc person just told you to use xe/xem. I know you don’t understand but try. that person just said “please only refer to my by name or title”. refer to that person as such. it’s that simple.
istg is it that hard to use fucking pronouns. this is why I don’t actually tell people my pronouns are fluid and just use they/them.
