Dec 4, 2020
me: *sees a ghost* omg are you dead
the ghost: of corpse
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Sweden
seen from Türkiye
seen from China
seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from France
seen from United States
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seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Yemen
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Hong Kong SAR China
seen from Russia
me: *sees a ghost* omg are you dead
the ghost: of corpse
hey yall dont ever hesitate to message me if u want me to share ur mutual aid posts or commission lists or antyhing that helps you financially
so when you’re not from Europe are you European’t
Pride.
Yesterday I finally finished a project I've been working on since June 2020. It took me months to finally finish, and for others it could've taken a month or two but for me it took a little longer. Going through emotional imbalances because of pill withdrawals and new medications and also grief, made the process slower but I finally finished it yesterday. I'm proud to say I am now the illustrator of a soon to be published book around May of 2021. My niece, who's my biggest supporter, saw how tired and happy I was yesterday, she started telling me how proud she was to have an auncle like me. As soon as she started saying all these wonderful things, I cried even more and she started crying too. She said when that book comes out, she's gonna tell everyone, "That's them. That's MY auncle" and the amount of happiness I felt from this little 11 year old girl made me feel like I really am doing my best as a person with artistic influences. It makes me so happy that I can be this figure for her and hopefully to many more.
mortimer mouse has dump truck ?
this is to those who dont know
this. so get some seedless grapes and freeze em for a long time. take em out of the freezer and add some lemon juice on top. its a combination of sweet and sour and its rlly good as a morning snack i started doing this a few days ago and its delishas
todays my first day taking my mood stabilizers :) wish me luck and tmm i start getting off benzos
a little update on medications
sooooo hi yall i havent really done an update on pills i think since november or october of last year? so ill explain a little bit of the situation.
my new psychiatrist is leaning me off benzos. for good. im happy but also a little less nervous than i should be. its not like im taking clona, im taking a pill thats less invasive, clotia (benzodiazepine), which is like clona but low key. after my period ends im slowly going to start transitiong my pill intake to 1/4 instead of 1/2 every day for maybe a week then stop taking them in two weeks. doctors orders, not that im doing it myself. a week ago i started taking a new medication called lamotrigine (mood stabilizer), and its been really lovely. i havent felt weird at all, i usually feel somnolence when i take new meds but not with this one. like. at all !!!!! so im happy because its a great sign i dont want to worry about. im planing to tell my psychiatrist that if theres a possible i can lean of mirtazapine (an anti depressant) because i feel like its not doing anything to me anymore as much as it did good things to me at the begining of 2018. i guess what im trying to say is, i have my ups and downs, truly. but my mental health compared from december to this year has gotten 50% better because ive been writing so much. ive been writing on my self help book a LOT and started to be mindful of my words and my actions. just a few days ago i had my first break down in a LONG time and thats good, because id have breakdowns at least once a week or would have constant panic attacks everyday. thats not the case anymore and i have faith that if i keep on doing this self help ill be able to do much more beautiful things in life like. a huge example of how writing has saved some part of me, is the fact i learned how to swim! and i wasnt capable of doing tht because of my irrational fear. i guess im geting outta line here but i wanted to share thjat. anyways. im slowly starting to lean off pills and my therapy sessions arent weekly anymore. my own therapist has seen ive been doing really good. im happy you guys. im really EXHAUSTED haha and still feel faitgued but i am happy and i want to normalize every emotion i have. i guess T has also been a huge impact to my mental health. if everything goes out well and i know stuff will go out well, ill be off medications sooner than id hope it to be. sorry for over sharing. i really needed to get this out and im happy to say that i havent relapsed for almost 3-4 months and i am just so at peace that ive fought those little inner demons in me that told me to take some benzos, and i managed and I SURVIVED. i love me and i love u guys sm thanks for reading :)