#bittersweetness

[milks-thoughts]

IM MAKING MORE :DD since people seemed to like my last post

this is so self-indulgent I can’t. I'm sorry if this writing is dog water

not proofread!

word count: 867

TW: death, war, apocalypse, illness, it’s bad future rottmnt we all know what’s going down

“ And it was nice “

Your hands gently shook, you looked at the smooth ground. Your lover's shell laying on the wall. your mouth opens in a small breathy intake before you sobbed.

" I knew you once, and it was nice. "

You were 16, a dumb teenager doing a science experiment on your roof. the chemical compound had exploded and colored the roof in a purple disaster. you turned and looked at your friend, his normally green face was purple like yours. a small laugh left you as you tried cleaning his face. he pushed you off and grumbled at you "C'mon! let me help- I was the one who wasn't listening to you and made the mess " Donnie just glared and you playfully shoved him a bit

" I knew your brain and your heart...and all your insides "

The first major casualty of the resistance hurt. it was a group of 30 that ended like a few ants on the sidewalk. It was a mission to infiltrate the Kraang and destroy a large portion of them. Donnie's tech had been destroyed like nothing like the titanium was just toothpicks. it had hurt him but no one said anything about it. your oh so rough hands held his face gently. he leaned into your touch and you simply sat there, letting his fears wash away. your gentle touches helped to heal his scars.

"Oh, I could tell, just with a look. what you were thinking, that's all it took "

Donnie glared after Leo, it was their fourth argument of the week and it was only Wednesday. April held CJ close to her before walking off, Mikey left in the middle again. you sighed and followed after Donnie, his prosthetic leg uncomfortably moving with each stride. his eyebrows furrowed in what one person could explain as anger. But you could see, he was scared. you all were. Cassandra died and left a child with the resistance, the apocalypse was no place for a baby after all. you caught up to your lover, his gaze softened when he turned to you. you simply held his face like all those years ago. you quickly learned to become the glue after Raph died a few months back

" you shared your secrets, and I shared mine "

He looked down and spoke to you of his plans " I'm going to plant an explosive in the Kraang base " he spoke of your mission in a few months. the resistance was charging the main Kraang base. you planned to attack Kraang Prime and hit him where it hurt. your eyes widened as he continued " the explosive will only detonate if you are within ten feet of it " your eyes widened in horror "Donatello no! " you yelled at him, already knowing what he was planning " the resistance needs this! " you felt tears brim your eyes as you sucked in a shaky breath " But I need you " the silence had never been more deafening.

" silence was comfy, without having to try "

You were going over food and other supplies, and he was fixing someone's prosthetic that had gotten stuck. Donnie, he smiled at you. It was another late night when you both struggled to fall asleep. You remembered nights like this before everything happened. Nights where you would draw, or do late-night school reports. and he worked on tech, you missed school even if it was hell. the apocalypse started right as you started college, April had convinced you to join her.

" We swapped our smiles, gifted advice "

Donnie smiled widely at you once you both figured out how to get the power working again. the resistance needed power, especially in the infirmary. He glanced at your paper afterward, you were quickly placed in charge of keeping track of food and other materials " you should also write when they'll expire " you hummed in agreement. too many times the food you have relied on has gone bad. You looked at the machine he was working on " you should grease the cogs a bit more, it's not gonna go fast enough "

" yes, I knew you once "

you tried fighting against Leo's hold as Mikey led the remaining resistance away. the plan had gone terribly and Donnie, your love, your life died for no reason. All you had left was a battleshell, his mask wrapped around one of its arms. you sobbed into its hard material. you have never felt more anguish, not even when you lost your parents.

" And it was nice "

the resistance had gotten sick with some strange illness. you were recovering from an amputated leg. April stayed at your side the whole time, they all knew you weren't going to survive. Hell, you knew you won't survive. so you held out until CJ had become a nice young man, and Mikey had such power that he could open portals, where April's hair had started to become gray. you couldn't help but let go, illness was pain, it was suffering. your eyes had become sunken in and your body was refusing food. You didn't feel as tired anymore. You blinked and saw the one person you prayed you'd see in death " I wondered when you were finally going to rest my love "

[sgcairo]

While Dottore shows clear disdain for even the thought of actually being considered Anastasiy's father, I like to think that he's weirdly sensitive to his son's emotions, dubbed his "motherly instincts" by a teasing Columbina.

At first, it was nothing more than occasionally jerking out of a dead sleep because he felt like something was wrong. That something wrong being the child trying to hide his sniffles as he cuddled up on the couch in search of comfort- which Dottore can't have that, he'll catch a cold. The first few times it seemed to be a fluke, Anastasiy just happened to be upset and wandering around in search of a quiet place to cry where he wouldn't be in the way. But after a coincidental string of instances, Dottore starts to catch on to something being... off.

Anastasiy isn't connected to the 'hive mind' of the segments. It comes with his baby status, apparently, but Dottore swears up and down that he can feel something. Most of the Harbingers just brush it off as him losing his marbles again, but Anastasiy starts seeking him out more at night, seems to take comfort in him being nearby. Hell, sometimes Dottore will wake up first and end up hunched over the bed, half asleep by the time the kid wakes up in tears. Dottore isn't Irnes, he isn't comforting by a long shot, but the kid grows on him, and he finds himself curled up in a bed two sizes too small for him with Anastasiy more often than not. His back isn't exactly happy about the arrangement, but it's worth it.

The closer he is, the less Anastasiy seems to worry, and he finds that he was wrong. He remembers thinking his son was nothing more than a little bastard, a version of him that loved mischief and mayhem- a burden, really. But now... He's found that the kid has inched closer to him, occasionally showing him his drawings and giving Dottore books to read. There's no longer that sudden bolt of panic, just a warm feeling that Dottore has never felt before.

And when he feels the pain of injury, the sadness of being betrayed by someone so close yet so far, when his son is too big to hold in his arms...

He still goes to him. He tends to his wounds, holds him by his side, and ignores the distant pulling, telling him that something is wrong.

Dottore is not a good man. He abandoned Anastasiy when he needed him most. He let his own anger and frustration get in the way of Pantalone's attempts to be amiable for the child's sake. He's fucked, and he knows it.

But Anastasiy deserves better. And he'll be damned if he doesn't give him his best.

[noshower]

There will be times you look back on and smile about, and times you look back on with tears still fresh. And there will be the times that give you both, and all shades between - your Lavender Days. Not the glory days, the golden days, or the worst days of your life - but the days where you waited, you were patient - you learned, and you grew. The days sewn in your heart, that make you who you are.

Posted by Caamp

[the-suns-also-rise]

Bookends: The “An Occurrence at Owl Creek” Ending

In Ambrose Bierce’s 1890 Civil War short story, a man condemned for treason against the Union stands at the edge of a bridge, a noose around his neck. As he falls towards the river, the rope snaps, and he plummets into the water. What ensues is a miraculous escape - each danger he survives is more fantastical and surreal than the last. He finally finds his way home and reaches out to embrace his wife when he is blinded by a flash of light – and the noose snaps taut. He had imagined his escape during the seconds between falling from the bridge and the noose breaking his neck.

This is an alternate ending for The 100: 17-year old Clarke is still in solitary, daydreaming of her escape and the fantastical adventures she’ll have afterwards. Doodling in her cell, it’s the only mind space she’ll know for the rest of her short life. On the morrow she will be floated for treason, and the 99+1 delinquents will be sent down to Earth without her.

[hopeless-babydoll]

You tell the prettiest lies 🥀

[deforestingsons]

This song is goddamn perfect for a RdR Music Video. Especially for The Morston fandom.

It was playing on the radio this morning here

And I was almost bawling my eyes out

It fits them so well

[poetic-discourse]

I followed the full moon.  It led me to your place tonight.  But you were not there  So I had to leave and take flight.  I wonder when you’ll realize  That everything was right  The way it was before,  That’s why we never fight.  However I appreciate  That you follow your true light  So I will not be bothered  By this unfavorable plight.