something i’m very normal about is dan heng feeling jealous of other people killing blade.
he feels awful about it, obviously. what the fuck is wrong with him? they’re in a truce, he doesn’t want ANYONE killing blade, that’s normal, but his reaction to seeing blade with a spear in his chest is that should be MY spear. that’s definitely not normal.
he pushes it down. of course he does. he doesn’t have any right to feel possessive over blades deaths. blade dying is bad because it hurts him, because he wakes up with this awful blank look on his face. not because dan heng wasn’t the one to do it. dan heng doesn’t want, shouldn’t want to hurt blade.
and he doesn’t! he swears!
he just feels this strange nausea when he sees blades blood drawn from anything else and he’s overcome with this urge to replace it with wounds from him. he just feels a strange sense of pride when he sees scars he knows are from him.
but they have a truce. and that’s fucked up anyways.
(what he doesn’t know is that blade kind of really wishes they didn’t have a truce, if only so dan heng would give him the Right kind of death. any death that doesn’t come from his spear feels strangely like betrayal.)
