(letter for the challenge)
Blake closed his eyes a moment, his fingers running down the piece of paper that had been placed in front of him. Letters were not usually his style—he barely liked talking about his problems let alone writing them down. Still, some things just needed to be said.
I don’t understand you at all. For months it was just us—you were the one that wanted us together and yeah, I was the one to end things but I didn’t want to. You know, for a long time I ignored people when they said that they would never go away, or leave, or even let me push them away (I know I do that) because everyone leaves sooner or later. Everyone. And honestly that all stuck until you promised me. Remember when you came back after everyone thought you died? Yeah, I do. You still had the watch I gave you. You said you wouldn’t leave and I stupidly believed you. It was a mistake; this whole relationship was a mistake. I told myself I wouldn’t be hurt again and you know what? That is exactly what happened. You fucked me up, Blaine, more than I can take. You actually broke me and it hurts. It’s like now I barely exist to you. I can understand moving on, that is a natural part of life I guess but after everything? It’s like none of it matters anymore. For as long as I can remember it was always you and me. When mom and dad went on vacation and business trips, we took care of each other. When Cooper wasn’t around? It was us. I used to sleep with you almost every night. You made the nightmares stop.
You’ve moved on and maybe it is time that I do the same or try to at the very least. I can’t pretend like things matter to you anymore when they don’t. I can’t pretend I fit in somewhere I don’t. I can’t let myself continue to be hurt over things that no longer matter. I’m losing my mind and it’s killing me. So I’m going to go for a while—crashing at a friend’s house. I’ll be sure to bring my cats and Carly so its one less thing to worry about.
Sorry,
B
Blake folded the letter as he crept into his brother’s room, carefully placing the paper down on his bed. The boy picked up his bag ready to take Indiana up on that offer.
Blaine had waited a couple of hours before going to check on Blake again, knocking on the the door. He didn't answer so Blaine assumed that he was still needing space and wandered towards his own room, spotting the small piece of paper on the bed.
Someone had left him a note? He picked up the note and quickly scanned it, feeling a deep pit in his stomach seem to swallow every emotion until he felt numb. Had he really been neglecting Blake that much? Had his distraction of the end of school and Sebastian really led to this?
Blake had left him, he was in the house on his own. The way too big house that now seemed ginormous. Every sound echoed, the sound of the clock in the hallway boomed. He was alone.
Of course he was alone, he had pushed Blake away and he deserved this. He had fucked Blake up so Blaine had to deal with the fallout. He lied down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling and felt tears well up in his eyes.
He carefully folded up the piece of paper and placed it on his bedside table, it was a remnant of Blake that he could hold onto. He had never admitted to Blake that his presence soothed him too when he was sleeping. Blaine didn't like sleeping alone as it gave way to the evil crawling of nightmares.
Each would be slightly different but again the same. Some would be of the train incident. Some of the rack and the horrors that he hadn't even spoken of, the few he remembered. But they all ended up with pain, deep emotional pain.
He prayed to whoever was listening to keep Blake safe. Safer than he could anyway, Blaine had failed at keeping his brother safe at all.
