#blank's thoughts

[blankweiss]

So I watched the video.

And sort of relieved, also very sad for him and for a couple of other things, like he redefining his "relationship" with his fans or redefining his boundaries regarding nsfw art. But totally fair considering the circumstances.

I'm glad that he'll concentrate on making content instead of fighting twitter fights. Maybe it will be more healthy mentally.

Also, I was sort of surprised to learn that he manages almost none of his social media interactions by now.

[blankweiss]

Twitch Wrapped

Under Read more for easier dash

Oh

Oh lol I only play 3 and 5 myself

I'm skipping the emotes cause 3 of the 5 are from a channel I unfollowed because ... he said okay I don't want to get into the dream drama so I won't speak about it but laughed at and encouraged comments in his own chat ...and tbf, I watched the vod first at a time it was muted so I didn't know what he said but I saw the laugh and I could see the chat on the stream. later on there was sound but I had already unfollowed and he's been soured for me ...which is sad cause I enjoyed watching him previously.

anyway, next:

I'm honestly surprised

uhhhh okay, what the heck?

urghh,, I cannot escape. It doesn't surprise me Tubbo is first, considering the reason his channel is the one I have most points in cause I was there for a good chunk of his 32 day subathon

[blankweiss]

*giggles* if you could see the thread I wrote onto my first twitter acccount ...

you'd all ask me if I am okay, lol.

[blankweiss]

Life update

strap in

first off. I feel more rotten, even upheaved once (under extraneous circumstances) and *giggles*

So, so. as soon as I'm more than 10 minutes upright I start feeling sick, which will be fun tomorrow since I have to walk 45 minutes to the supermarket to get cheap meat.

I don't want to eat.

the entire bathroom was flooded and we all don't know who to blame but ma and me had to clean it up ... we didn't wear masks cause being upside down was upsetting enough so I am very afraid that I'm catching covid ... I did a self-test again two hours ago and that was negative but that was before we stood in close proximity for 30+ minutes

I just brushed my teeth so they're feeling fresh but as soon as pain sets in I am going to go spare.

*sobs* I wonder ....if I take a valerian pill I'll only sleep an hour or so, from experience.

I'm this close to drinking alcohol to numb myself but ...I'm holding off since I don't know whether I'll want to take pain med or not...I can prepare myself fro some sleepless nights that will be completely unproductive lol

[blankweiss]

Life Update

I#m not feeling rotten (yet) ( oh flashback to christmas last year I want to cry just remembering) but I'm not feeling good either.

I swear to god if I get covid because ma's husband refused to be in a room with her WITH a mask and he's been relocated to MY room ...

OH yeah, something that happened last night, when we both went to go do a lil bit of grocery shopping:

*we just left the house, before that he'd be tinkering in the kitchen without a mask and mom has situated herself at the kitchen table, to still work despite being sick*

Me: I swear to God, If I get covid because you didn't wear a mask while being in the same room as mom

Him: silence, then "Oh sorry, I had ear phones in what were you saying?"

(Background info: I have teeth and jaw pain. Speaking fucking HURTS)

Me: "If I get sick with covid because you didn't wear a mask when you're with Mom in a room, who has a positive self-test..."

Him: "How about you bring away the paper trash? Or wash the dishes?"

Me: "WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WIth WEARING A MASK AND GEttING SICK?!"

Him:" sure, it's ok, everything's fine" patronizingly placating

And my tooth pain is a dull constant which is better than constant sharp pain but my head's starting to scream too and *takes a deeo breath* I've planned to make a trip today to a store where only the travelling time to and back is 3 hours and I want to go to a big supermarket a couple km away cause they have minced meat cheaper and I need that for a New Years' dish and -

welcome to a blank meltdown cause I'm overthinking and not taking things one by a time and my pain addled brain just wants to cry and I'm this close to begging my Spain family to send me their 1g pain med, something that is prohibited without a recipe where I live which I cannot get and-

I'm doing it again. *groans*

okay. just. Blank, go walk dogs. if you're feeling like it, make yourself one cup of vitamin c tea. then cry while getting yourself a 10€ day ticket and begin travelling to somewhere you've never been.

It will be an adventure! You can do Pokemon go somewhere brand new!

Ignore headaches and shivers, maybe pop another 400g ibuprofen, tho you literally just took one. Or hey maybe that one will take effect during your dog walk.

[blankweiss]

grrr

[blankweiss]

I'm gonna write tomorrow I have decided. I'm heading to bed early.

[blankweiss]

I'm never getting married unless as a trophy wife