this old dog
Hi again. It’s another day... another ‘new’ day, at that. Yet it’s about 80% the same old routine I normally have on Thursdays. This means it’s my third day off from work, and just a day more before I have a break from school, aka “the weekend.” But then there’s work. All weekend. This is the blueprint to my life, lately. Routine. That’s not a bad thing. I don’t mind overall, but man. Could get a little boring, and tiring... and I’m feeling the wave of depression flush me so that doesn’t really help the cause. Boo hoo. I’ve grown used to this. It’ll work its way out, and then back in again. I’m used to this. It still stuns the shit out of me to think that I’ve reached the age of 27 years. I think I’ve always been one to fixate on how time flies yet I always seem to fall back into allowing myself to sulk, and subconsciously not let myself be one hundred percent. The fact of time zooming quickly passed everyone feels more real. Feels more real than ever. So much has happened, and hasn’t. This sounds like a sad entry. There’s probably going to be a lot of these. Oh well. That quote from Eternal Sunshine when she says she feels like she always feels like she’s not living the fullest --- I think I am finally really understanding that. I feel the same way, Clem.
Oh yeah, and a little side note, fuuuck traffic lately. (Since all schools have started, it’s been rare for me to get to school on time.) Fml anxiety as fuck @ 7am is another part of my daily routine. Boo fucking hoo