Espanyol 0 - 3 FC Barcelona
Quique Sanchez:QS
Diego Lopez: DL
Reporter: Quique, it wasn’t meant to be, you lost 0-3, two from Suarez and one from Rakitic. But you did manage to stop Messi from scoring. How did you do it?
QS: Well, at first we planned on man-marking him.
DL: Well that didn’t work huh.
QS: But it wasn’t enough apparently so we thought to try a double man-marking.
DL: Well that didn’t work huh.
QS: We tried to mark him using the whole squad including kit-men and some fans..
DL: Come on, come on, come on.... Well that didn’t work huh.
QS: We planned on leaving the grass grow tall, since he is so short, that way his teammates won’t be able to see him..
DL: Well that didn’t work huh.
QS: Maybe using a bear trap...
DL: Well that didn’t work huh.
QS: We even tried putting the bear there...
DL: Well that didn’t work huh.
QS: We tried calling Kim Jong-un asking him to launch a missile in the middle of the match..
DL: Well that didn’t work huh.
QS: We finally managed to stop him from scoring.. by doing all of those together at once...
DL: That’s it boys, good job..
DL: And the blond one.. who’s marking him??
QS: What we didn’t think of, was that if Messi didn’t score, he’d give the assists and our boys would just gift them two goals.. so.. We’ll see what we’ll invent next year....
@xavimascheranos @luchorgasm @messikobe @blaugr4na @neymardefensesquad @thinkingoverloves @lionelandresmessii
