Everyone Can't Handle It
When we lose a loved one, sometimes our lives resemble these pots. The fiery damage (such as loss of income, family drama etc) caused by the loss of the loved one can cause us to internally "boil" to such an extent that if we fail to properly deal with our grief, it spills out on others and damages everything that it touches. Although, we know that it is important to deal with our grief properly, sometimes, we are tempted to share the rawest of our emotions with everyone via social media or those we come in contact with. In the moment, the release may feel good, but when close friends unfollow you, family and friend relationships become strained it does not feel good. Ask me how I know. In 2020, when my husband died from Covid-19 after five months of marriage, I was devastated! Sometimes, I took pictures of myself in the moment of a tearful moment and posted it online. At the time, I kept reciting in the mirror that I was getting up from this broken place. However, I wanted to show people that it is ok to cry because tears are a form of release. Immediately following the posting of the picture, I received a few inbox messages from people stating things such as "Please don't post things like that because I come to your page to be uplifted and inspired". I also had people unfriend and unfollow me. I also received messages from others that stated that my authentic pictures let them know that it was ok for them to go through the grieving process without having to wear a mask. I remember being shocked and appalled by these statements from those who were upset about my pictures. One day, I spoke to a group of my good friends about what I was experiencing. To my surprise, one of my sisters said to me "Sis, you really can't be mad at them for stating why they come to your page. Everyone can't handle the magnitude of what you are going through. For years, your page has always been about uplifting, sharing information, business etc. To be fair, you are always smiling on your photos and people never seen this side of you." Her words cut me like a knife going through a tough steak. With every "jagged" cut from the words that were shared, I saw things differently. As a result, I was able to give those who unfriended or unfollowed me grace. I shared this to tell you that if you are dealing with grief following the loss of a loved one, you have a right to heal while writing but the venue of your healing may need to shift because everyone can not handle your brokenness. When Jesus went to pray that "this cup pass from me" he only took three people. He did not take all of his disciples. There are groups on Facebook filled with people who may be dealing with grief and they openly share where they are in that safe space. Join those groups and feel free to write your post there until you are ready to write your story. Healing through writing starts as small steps that lead to a glorious destination. You can do this. It's time to embrace the royal you.
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