Christians, Buddhists, and Atheists, OH MY! or; My religious road trip. Part 2
So, graduated the hell hole. Decided to distance myself from everything and everyone from school, save a select few.
Writer's Note
***The views in this post do not represent how I feel about all religious/christian/ believers. This is just my experience with religion, and why I hate it. Unless you start thumping my head with a bible, we will do just fine. KTHXBAI***
My boyfriend at that time started to get sucked into church, and convinced me to go.
I went for a few times, but decided, again, it wasn't for me. He then threatened to break up with me. Since we had been dating for a couple years, and I had SEVERE body image issues, I started going on a regular basis.
I started to get sucked in as well. After being an outcast for so long, it felt good to have somewhere people accepted me. Which is why I stayed, and became the type of person I hate.
After they removed my brain, let it soak for several hours, they put it back, and I was born again. I got baptized, I would hide witness cards, I preached, and I judged. I became the bible thumper, I became the one who would try to sneak pocket bibles into the pockets of those I thought needed saving, I became the one than condemned the 'sinners' to hell.
I was even trying to preach to my sister (which is a horrible idea because she is several years older than me, cause she has also read the bible and can start spitting right back).
Thankfully, this was the shortest phase of my life. Only lasting from 18 until about 23ish.
I had met my now husband a year before. I started to see what I had become, and I hated myself for it. I slowing started to fall out of love with religion.
To steal a line from "The Fault in our Stars" (LOVE THAT BOOK) it happened slowing, and then all at once. I started questioning things, a dangerous thing to do if you want to stay in the religion bubble. Things that had happened to me made me start to lose my faith, why would something so horrible happen to someone who was so devoted?
Then one day I just didn't believe anymore. That was my real 'born again' day, because it felt amazing. I could be me.
I became introduced to Buddhism through my Sensei in my martial arts school.
I loved the altruistic views and non-judgmental feel. I still consider myself atheist, but I definitely follow some of the Buddhist views and ways of life.
I will trust you until you give me a reason not to, I will love you until you give me a reason not to, and I will respect you until you give me a reason not to.
No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.- Buddha
