After getting pinged by a bot for the gazillionth time, something possessed me to rewrite the Eggman‘s Announcement copy pasta to send to bots instead, so here you go, for your trolling pleasure.
I’ve come to make an announcement. [bot account name here] is a bot ass motherfucker. They pinged on my fucking notifications. That’s right, they took their bot ass pre-written script out and pasted on to this person’s post, and they said it was “really important” and I said “that’s disgusting”.
So I’m making a call out post on my tumblr dot com: [bot account name here], you got a shit script. It’s the quality of My Immortal, except way worse. Here’s what my comment look like: That’s right, baby. All prose, no AIgen, no notes-begging. Look at that! It looks like three paragraphs and a closing statement.
They pinged my notifications, so guess what? I’m gonna ping the earth! That’s right, this is what you get, MY SUPER LAZER POST! Except I’m not pinging the Earth, I’m gonna go higher. IM POSTING ON THE MOOOOON!!! HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, MATT MULLENWEG? I POSTED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!!
You have twenty-three hours before the post notes hit the fucking Earth, now get out of my sight before I ping on you too.