#c1e2

[mareastrorum]

Vex: Should we go buy some potions then? Percy: Yes, let's go buy some potions. Scanlan: He gave us a little bit of information. The valve of valva, what's it? Valor of-- Grog: Vulva? Scanlan: The place to place to go buy potions. Tiberius: The House of Valor. Scanlan: No, the vulva-- Tiberius: It's not the House of Vulva, Scanlan.

Matt: The Value of Valor.

Vex/Scanlan: The Value of Valor! Grog: If you want to visit the House of Vulva, you and I can go later but not now. Vex: The Value of Valor, let's go find that.

[a short time later]

Sam: All right, we go into the House of Vulva. Matt: All right.

Scanlan: Open your vulva!

Matt: That's not what it's called.

Matt was already weary before the stream even began.

[aeoris4lovers]

highlights from c1e2:

“clearly we’re idiots— stay with me on this”

song of rest (scanlan make you feel real good)

“i could fit you in my lap” “i’ve killed”

the house of vulva

“i haven’t raged yet? but i’m so angry!”

“🎶nooo motherfucker miss🎶”

umber-snail over the waterfall (“toodle-oo shitface!”)

fleshy undercarriage

“🎶le poisson, lepoisson, hehehe! fuck you bitch!🎶”

“sneak attack into his ballsack! i want to stick it in the back of his spider nads and then rip it up his bum”

“nobody touches my man-wife”

“you can’t inspire a cantaloupe, no matter what you tell the cantaloupe it’s not going to feel better about itself. i’ve tried insulting a cantaloupe, you just don’t get anywhere”

this face:

[zephsomething]

Episode 2! That’s when Percy starts coming up with ideas of things to make for Vex (and Keyleth is like ‘absolutely yes make Vex cool shit’)

[annemarieyeretzian]

vax shouting “no one touches the gnome!” and killing the umber hulk harrowing scanlan 🥺

[cappurrccino]

matt sure loves underground rivers, huh?

[b-eauyasha]

"Le poisson, le poisson, hee hee hee FUCK YOU BITCH" thanks Travis lmao

[crtranscript]

Herding cats

MARISHA: And so, that is how I spent my 12th birthday.

SAM: Great story, Keyleth. And, yeah.

MARISHA: Let’s see, what else.

TRAVIS: Hey Scanlan, you kill me, I kill you.

LIAM: There a great little cave alcove here, perfect for peeing in.

LAURA: Oh brother, good to see you.

LIAM: For everyone to pee.

LAURA: Am I over here, or am I over here? Perhaps we could take a pee break here and proceed further into the mines.

MARISHA: I agree with that.

LAURA: That’s a good idea.

LIAM: Do you catch my drift?

MATT: As the four hour mark of travel into this tunnel presents itself, the tunnel finally widens and opens. As the sound of distant water rushing reaches your ears.

LAURA: Oh no, I have to go to the bathroom.

[zephsomething]

Liam and Travis: trying to figure out how much gold the group has

Laura, while being as vague as possible: I don’t like sharing