"I'm sorry I called you at 3AM. I needed you."/ "I don't want to be your secret, anymore."/ ♛, ▼, 💍// lawyer ple
i apologize in advance for one of these you already know which one
“I’m sorry I called you at 3AM. I needed you.”
Logan groggily glanced over at the clock that sat on the dresser beside his bed in the hotel room, confirming that it indeed was 3am. He sat up and rested against the headboard, listening to Sawyer’s breathing on the other line. “It’s okay,” Logan murmured, his voice deep and scratchy from sleep. It had been so long since he’d heard Sawyer’s voice, and he couldn’t deny that he was actually glad Sawyer had finally called him. “You know you can call me whenever you need to. You can always talk to me. I’ve missed you a lot,” he confessed, playing with a stray piece of string coming out of the material of the comforter. “Is everything okay, though?”
“I don’t want to be your secret, anymore.”
Almost immediately after the words left Sawyer’s lips, Logan looked up at him with a surprised expression. Typically the two of them were okay with keeping things a secret from the fans and the media– it was just how things had to work between them. But then again, there was always a part of Logan who wanted to be able to be open about his relationship with Sawyer. He wanted to be able to walk down the streets holding his hand, to take him on dates without having to hide, to have him watching his shows from beside the stage and be waiting with open arms when he was finished. He wanted all of that for them. So when Sawyer finally said that he wanted the same thing, Logan smiled. He leaned over and pressed his lips to the boy’s forehead, smoothing his hand over his cheek. “Then don’t be, baby,” the brunet said quietly, stepping back a bit. “Let’s tell everybody. Who gives a shit what anyone thinks? I love you and you love me, so fuck it. No more hiding.”
♛: my muse finds your muse after they ran away.
Logan was so, so tired of fighting. After another argument the night before, Sawyer had been the one to leave. Logan gave him time, knowing they both needed some space, but when Sawyer still hadn’t come back the following night, Logan began to get worried. He wasn’t answering his phone and none of their friends had heard from him. Logan was borderline panicking, checking every bar in town, and even driving to Sawyer’s parents house, where they said they hadn’t seen him either. Logan knew he’d fucked up, and he was angry at Sawyer before, but he still cared about his safety more than anything. On his drive home from Sawyer’s parent’s house, he passed by their old middle school, and furrowed his eyebrows when he saw a head of blonde hair sitting on one of the benches by the playground. He immediately parked his car in the parking lot and walked over to the bench, seeing none other than Sawyer. He sighed as he sat down beside him, slowly resting his head on the boy’s shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “Please come home.”
▼: your muse is dying in my muse’s arms.
It came as a bit of a shock to everyone, when Sawyer suddenly fell ill.
For a while, he seemed fine. He may have been acting a little more off than usual, his mind going in an out of focus easily, but Logan figured it was just from the stress of school, or maybe he was coming down with a small virus or something. He couldn’t have been more wrong.
It was a rare, nearly unheard of kind of brain cancer that slowly took over Sawyer’s body and mind, and it was eating away at him at a steady pace daily. There was no cure to be found yet.
The first few weeks were the hardest– Sawyer was bedridden and hardly able to move on his own most days. Logan had cancelled his tour, instead dedicating his life to being by his boyfriend’s side 24/7. He was constantly fighting with the doctors, begging them, pleading for them to do something. “It’s your job to fucking fix him, not sit there and watch him die!” Logan had screamed at them one day, flinching when Sawyer immediately started sobbing afterwards. There was no worse sound than Sawyer’s tears, simply due to the fact that he was dying and there was nothing he could do.
Eventually, though, acceptance came. Sawyer knew that if this was the way things were going to be, they shouldn’t be wasting their time fighting with doctors and crying. Logan knew he was right, and decided then that he would do whatever he could to make the time Sawyer had left count.
His family had come to see him quite often, but it was always Logan who stayed every second of every day. The hospital staff began to know him by name, and he even had a cot just for him in Sawyer’s room. (Of course, Sawyer made him sleep in the bed with him whenever he could.) They both thought things would be okay, that maybe somewhere along the way, the doctors would find a cure. But Logan could see Sawyer visibly becoming weaker and weaker as the months went by. And when the nurses thought they were both asleep one morning, and Logan heard one of them murmur “I think it’s going to happen tonight”, Logan couldn’t be more scared. Because he knew they were right.
Logan immediately knew he had to make that day perfect for Sawyer. They spent the whole day in his bed together, watching his favorite movie (twice), eating all the jello the hospital could offer (even if Logan had to feed him), and Logan even got to wheel him outside for an hour. (That one hurt the most, because normally the doctors were wary to let him do so– it just further proved that everyone seemed to know it was almost time, except for Sawyer himself.)
As they got ready for bed that night, Logan fought to keep the tears at bay, mostly for Sawyer’s sake. He held the dying boy close to him, smoothing back his hair and pressing slow kisses everywhere he could reach. “I love you so much,” he had whispered, pulling back so that he could look down at him. “Sawyer, you’ve given me the best years of my life, and I’m so thankful. I’ll love you forever. I can’t even put it into words,” as he started choking up, he pressed his face into the boy’s shoulder and cried softly, wondering why this had to happen to them. A few moments later, after Logan had sang to him softly, the two were fast asleep, tangled in each other’s arms as best as they could in the small hospital bed.
As soon as Logan’s eyes fluttered open the next morning, he knew Sawyer was gone.
He could physically feel his heart breaking, an overwhelming numbness spreading within him as he felt Sawyer’s still body in his arms. He let his eyes fall closed again, taking in the silence, and strangely felt a small feeling of peace within the room. He knew within minutes, maybe hours, the nurses and doctors would come in and check on him and they’d find out what happened. Logan would be pulled away from his body and Sawyer would be taken from him, and he’d never be able to hold him ever again. So he let his eyes fall shut, taking in this final moment with the love of his life, tears falling down his cheeks at a slow and steady pace. “I’ll love you forever. I promise,” he whispered into the silence of the room, pressing a final kiss to the boy’s forehead.
💍: our muse’s wedding day.
“Logan, what the hell are you doing?”
Logan giggled at Sawyer’s words, closing the door behind him. There were only about 20 minutes before they were set to walk down the aisle, and to say Logan was nervous was an understatement. “Sorry, I just– I wanted to see you. And don’t give me that whole ‘it’s bad luck to see the groom before the wedding’ shit, because I don’t care,” he laughed, reaching up to adjust Sawyer’s tie. “You look amazing, babe,” Logan sighed, lifting his head to kiss the blond, laughing whenever Sawyer stopped him. “Fine, fine, I’ll save the kisses for the altar,” he grinned, rolling his eyes. He still couldn’t believe that they were finally here, and that he was finally going to marry his best friend in the entire world. “Alright, well, I better get back. I’ll meet ya at the altar.” With one final wink, he slid out of the room, more than ready to get that ring on his finger.
