Triple Threat - dnd campaign updates (1)
A story of three lonely fellas who no longer wish to be lonely anymore.
Our story begins with our three goobers:
Blooper Inkwell- a water genasi tempest cleric
Orion Estelle- a tabaxi druid
Miles Moonshine- a shadar Kai ranger
(We’re starting at level one)
I’ll try to give you guys like a reasonable amount of updates within each post because this campaign has been going on for almost a year now so. It’s a lot of information and I don’t wanna overwhelm people within ONE post.
Our three goobers find ourselves in the Ivory Kingdom which is a sub-Arctic continent, similar to Greenland.
We find ourselves in the small town of Farport which is a port trading town, and isn’t the wealthiest.
Miles got arrested for a month for jaywalking because he inconvienced the prince Zalastar and was locked up with a half orc jail mate and barely got any sleep as his jail mate snored a lot.
After getting out, he and his two buddies went out to go take a quest.
The quest was: merchants from Farport have gone missing when going to the city of Valica, since the two places are partners in that.
We went to go talk to the mayor of Farport, who knew Miles after writing him up a few times for shenanigans (crime) upon explaining who the three were he called us “stupid enough” to do this quest. After some. Interesting banter, we went off to see Samantha Green- who’s husband was a merchant and he went missing upon trying to go to Valica.
We spoke to her and gave her our word we’d bring her husband home, and she asked if we could help her out with a rat problem she was having.
We go out to the barn, and I’m like 90% sure they were dire rats (our dm didn’t say) but they were dog sized rats. And they were all covered in blood and munching on something.
After taming two of them and killing the third who was feral. We cleaned them up, got our pay from Samantha who was horrified. And decided it’d be funny if we gave the rats to the mayor.
He was not happy about that as we walk away and hear “WHAT THE FUCKKKK” being screamed from his home.
We found an inn and that was our first session.
We are all broke and cannot afford a horse and Orion can’t wildshape yet.
The next best thing to carrying a wagon full of trading goods? Use the party tank. (Miles)
The goods had the alert spell on them, and the mayor threatened us.
Anyway- walk to Valica is a two days walk on foot. (Or one and a half, I don’t recall) and most of it was uphill.
On our way there, we heard noises within the trees- as to which, Orion went and hid on the opposite side and Blooper attempted to scare away by using thaumaturgy and yelling “HEY FUCKER”
A half orc came out, and upon bloopers yelling ripped his map in half. Now pissed at us, Blooper and Miles got ready to fight.
Meanwhile since Orion was never spotted- he used charm person, and came out and basically said “hey big guy. Go that way.” And that. Worked.
After that we obtained the torn map, and found there was an X on it in between the mountains we were in.
We’d check that out later.
Continuing our journey we found a Selune temple looking ravaged, there was blood on the trees and ground, arrows, etc. and there were three pairs of footprints going deeper into the woods.
We decided to check that out later as we had a delivery to make.
We all went to sleep in the forest and got up the next day and headed to Valica.
There was an election happening between two mayors: Gilbert Thornwell(?) and Lyre Everrose.
What we gathered was that Gilbert was a gnome who was bigger on community and keeping the people of Valica together and strengthening it, while Lyre was bigger on expansion and capitalism, strengthening bonds of the economy. Wasn’t long before we found the merchants guild.
After some issues with the guards, we eventually got in and met the head of the merchants guild- a half orc named Korg.
Prior the mayor of Farport who’s name is Karaldic Hamelton (he’s an elf) told us that Korg “wasn’t the nicest person”
Upon meeting Korg we all loved him.
We told him the situation in farport and what we saw on the way here with the temple outpost and found out very quickly that Korg was a Selune worshipper as he had a Selune emblem on him and said “this just got personal” he also told us that no one from Farport has been coming here in about a month and whatnot.
Also he hates Farport mayor- as. All of us do. After shit talking Keraldic to Korg he wished us luck on our journey.
We went around the city for a bit to ask around about questions for the missing merchants and one conversation we heard was “yeah I just bought one the other day, they’re great.” We didn’t get much out of those people.
Orion asked someone if they’d seen “a little black cat” but the person he asked thought he meant a literal cat and not a tabaxi. So no.
We went shopping for a little bit then back out it was.
Session 3/4 because I cannot remember the order of these anymore, but I’ll sure as hell try:
We got back to the Selune outpost and followed the tracks which led up this super jagged mountain, and we all rolled extremely well on climbing so we got up fuckin easy.
We all stayed at the base of it as we watched and saw a goblin camp with the merchants we were supposed to save.
There was this wooden wall that was like 20 ft high, and Orion snuck up there and Miles teleported up there.
Hung out on the cliff as he watched us.
Orion and Miles made a plan and then high-fived before Orion climbed back down to tell Blooper what was up, Miles was able to climb ontop the wall and sneak around to where the merchants were.
Blooper had cast light on one of his crossbow bolts and shot it up as a distraction and then cast fog cloud within the little wooden wall area so that Miles wouldn’t be caught.
Miles got down but not without busting his shoulder.
All the merchants were very afraid of him at first as he was able to bust out two of the merchants from their wooden cages, and was coming up with a plan to how to get them out.
Trying to make an exit path there was one person who would see him, so he one shotted them dead and then went back to save the third merchant.
Blooper got caught and decided it’d be a great idea to pop out and try to talk his way out of this.
The only person who caught him was the bugbear boss who was seemingly in charge of this whole deal.
After bloopers many attempts to talk his way out of the situation- we went into combat.
Blooper tried to zap the guys off (tempest cleric) but ended up going down twice and lost two of his fingers which made the fog cloud drop, Orion came down and hit the place with some earth tremors and infestations. And Miles was just focused on getting the actual fuck out of there with the merchants.
He got caught by a half orc and a few hobgoblins- the half orc was the same from earlier.
The half orc tried throwing his club at Miles and missed- instead hitting the wooden wall enclosure, which made for a nifty little exit.
Miles tore a peace of his clothing and put an arrow in fire before it hit the wall- setting it on fire before grabbing two of the merchants- the third following behind. Made it outside the now burning and partially broken wall.
If I recall correctly- Blooper was unconscious most of the fight, and Orion was fighting for his life.
Not to worry- help was on the way.
Our kolbold monk named Dragon Deeznutz (his player made it to one session and never came back, but we appreciated him in this fight regardless) Dragon beat the shit out of the half orc, Orion and him had known one another and were boyfriends.
Orion was super low on health but ran over to help Dragon out with tag teaming the half orc.
Blooper. Still fighting for his life- but by a miracle was able to survive (I don’t remember how)
Miles beat the shit out of some people and burned two people alive in the fire. Subtle.
After the fight, Orion went over and proposed to Dragon and he said yes.
Everyone was super tired (other than Miles who only lost like 4 HP during this because he put his hand in a fire)
And we all took a long rest and leveled up!
Orion got his circle and chose land, Miles got his fighting style and did Druidic warrior and I don’t remember Wtf Blooper got.
Ok that’s all for now for campaign updates!
I’ll post a second part to this soon (because I have a lot of the sessions written down already)
A story about three goobers
If you haven’t read the first campaign update here it is
A story of three lonely fellas who no longer wish to