Tomorrow will mark one month since my boss got us in a car accident that could have killed us, but, more importantly to me recently, me.
I still have nightmares about the wreck.
I still feel the ache on my body when I move.
I'm still recovering from the entirety of that situation on a lot of levels.
I realize for a lot of people this is a hot topic or something to talk about, but I promise I do not want to talk about it with every person that walks in the door and if I want to talk about it, Ill bring it up, like I am now.
People are so obsessed with trauma and devastation they dont think about how people might feel when topics are brought up out of the blue and its frustrating the lack of consideration and emotional depth people seem to have.
What I experianced was like experiancing a bomb physically go off in my face. We had a truck literally mold the drivers side of the car around its front end... 3 days before Christmas, Literally one week after my sons 3rd birthday... I just picked the last of the glass out of my face last week.
I woke up tonight from nightmares. Thats the only reason I'm here. And the fucking point is dont talk to me about it unless I bring it up and even then maybe just like use your brain cells for 5 seconds and think before you ask stupid shit and stir a pot thats already boiled over and making a fucking metaphorical mess around the topic. I have a therapist and close friends, I dont need to or want to relive the event with every person who saw a half assed glimpse of a post about the situation.
Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.
P.s. I also realize most people dont even know they are triggering and mean well, so I do say "yea its kind of a traumatizing thing I dont want to talk about" which does help with most situations. Im not mad at anyone, I just think people dont realize the weight of it all... and its a tad frustrating and demoralizing.
