So I currently have food poisoning and I can’t help but it think how mad Carmy would be if a restaurant gave his gf/wife food poisoning
Also Carmy come take care of me and make me soup plz 🙇♀️😫
Plus he would give the best snuggles 😭
firstly, sending lots of love and recovery, i've never actually had fp lmao so a lot of time on webmd will be spent. get ur fluids in! secondly, carmen might have to go underground for setting the restaurant on fire. we love him for it
summary: You were hungry and had just finished work and you didn't think about inspecting the goddamn Michelin star restaurant, maybe you should have.
warnings; cursing, food poisoning, richie (he's a warning), hipsters, talks of future arsony, possessive carmen, cracked fic ngl,
divider by @firefly-graphics
i'm slipping back into the unsafe territory of wanting fictional characters. (and i don't care)
You could roll your eyes in annoyance if you weren't hunched over the ceramic bowl of the toilet heaving out the contents of your stomach while Carmen held you hair back.
The one time, the one goddamn time you decide to try a new place without Carmen's input, without his meticulous standards and in depth research behind every night out.
It wasn't like you hadn't tried to vet the new braised beef spot that opened up on west Avenue. In fact, you had heard all but stellar reviews from friends and family, meeting you with suprise hearing that Carmen hadn't taken you. You decided to bring home a small plate, their signature braised meat with plums, red onions and atrichocke hearts.
You had meant to share it with Carmen, and you were going to, but a botched catering order had him staying back another hour than what had been planned. And well..you say you tried to save some for Carmen, but despite its bacteria laced beef and vomit inducing sides it was pretty fuckin' good.
Was this God's wrath coming down upon you? Punishing you for your gluttony? Food poisoning did feel awfully close to perpetual hellfire.
The TV was blaring some indescriptive show, the kind with dramatic introductions and soap opera worthy screams. It helped fill the space of absence when Carmen worked long nights, and you felt quite comfortable wrapped up in a blanket with a full stomach and a warm sofa.
Your phone had pinged with the sound of Carmen's text, letting you know he was on the way when it started. At first you had written it off as mere indigestion, probably from shoveling the cursed meal into your mouth too quickly.
Then, around the time the show's main character had found out her boyfriend got her mother pregnant, the nausea set in. Swirling aches that felt like a whirlpool in your stomach had taken over, sloshing and swirling and never leaving. You couldn't mistake it, as you tried to swallow past a dry throat and the creeping sweats of a headache inducing fever began to ravage your body.
You hated sitting in discomfort, it wasn't as though you were afraid of vomiting no, you just could not bare to feel the way your stomach skipped and jumped with every wave of nausea that took over.
You thought of making yourself sick, but shook your head when the alarming disapproval of Carmen's voice loomed over.
"It's just gonna make it worse, you gotta sit with it till it passes"
Fuck him and his medical knowledge. What did he know?
You had ripped off the blanket that had once felt comforting, peeling of layers of clothing that stuck to your body like a second skin. You just felt hot, so hot, is anyone else feeling this heat? You try to move from the couch to reach your phone, but the sudden movement has nausea bubbling up your throat.
You fall to the ground in a heap, hand clasped around your mouth to stop the possibility of projectile vomiting on the rug you had just bought and shoot your hand up to reach for your phone.
You press Carmen's number, begging him to answer you in genuine crisis rather than when you were drunk with friends and missed him. You feel the urge to heave and crawl quickly to the bathroom, phone clasped in hand and suddenly desperately needed his medical knowledge.
Carmen phone rings from the behind the stack of documents in the office, and he hastily wipes his hands across his apron before trying to reach it before it rings out.
Guilt fills his stomach at the thought of you, he was meant to be home hours ago. The catering order needed a few extra hands to help, and once Carmen began he got lost in it, and now you had spent nearly the entire night alone.
"Fuck- Hey baby, I know I said I was comin' but I had to finish a couple things-" Carmen quickly responds as he swipes the call button.
The groan of pain that responds has Carmen freezing in the middle of the kitchen.
"Baby? What-, are you okay?" Carmen replies quickly, his voice going short as his mind turns every possible scenario that had you whining in pain over the receiver.
"Please come quickly, Carmen I think I might-" You gulp and make a retching sound "I think I got sick from that place I was telling you about" You plead out, breathing heavily into the speaker.
The guilt that had filled Carmen seems to morph into an anger that rushes up his chest as he shakes his head.
"The new place? The one with the fuckin' smoke meat? They did this?"
"Mhm" You mumble "I should've just listened to you" You groan out in sadness.
"Fucking idiots. How the fuck did they even? Okay, okay honey just gimme a second yeah?"
How did he let this happen? Carmen has half the mind to stop at the restaurant that more of a Instagram attraction that a respected place of business. You were so eager and excited t try it, Carmen had his own thoughts but would glue his mouth shut if it meant making you happy.
He'll make sure they get shut down, or at least black listed from Chicago as long as he's concerned. His hands shake with the eager want for the fight, to smash someones jaw for resorting you to a heap of tears and sick. He would, he knows he will, but at this moment he needed to take care of your first.
He mumbles out a rushed reply, phone between his shoulder and ear as he slips out of his work shoes and into his sneakers. He thinks for a moment to grab his things but immediately shut that thought out when he hears you groaning into the phone.
"Just stay on the phone okay? I'm coming now, I need to get you some things alright?"
You let out what you hope is a reply, hunched over the toilet.
Carmen rushes to the store fridge, grabbing containers of soup Tina had prepared for family as the Chicago winter was getting close.
"You alright kid?" Richie mumbles, walking into the kitchen entry way, scratching his stomach as he watched Carmen's erratic movements around the store.
"Fuckin-, she's sick. And I'm here chopping up tomatoes for fucking Guy while she was in pain for god knows how long-"
"Woah, Bugs sick? We talking COVID or.."
"I'm such a fucking idiot. No it's not COVID Rich, Jesus Christ. Some rookie new spot trying something outside of their abilities gave her food poisoning. Fuckin' hipsters"
"Oh that's bad. You know when I got food poisoning the one time I took Tiff to this romantic getaway. Had me projectile vomiting in the AirBnb bathroom. Couldn't even get a deposit back, had to pay some dumb ass cleaning fee-"
Carmen wipes a hand across his face shaking his head. He was already pent up, he might throw a pan at Richie if he doesn't stop talking.
"Richie, I don't have time for this, I need to get her some Sprite or"
Richie shuffles across to the cupboard near the back of the house, grabbing bottles of Gatorade and a pack of saltine crackers.
"How do you even have this stuff lying around"
"You're the one with the inhuman alcohol tolerance Carmy, someone of us actually have hangovers you freak" Richie retorts
"Yeah yeah, thanks. Fuck- I gotta" Carmen replies, to which Richie nods.
"Go. I'll wrap up anything here" Richie replies, understanding in his voice. You took precedence over pretty much everything in Carmen's life.
"And Carm?"
"Yeah?" Carmen calls out, slipping on his jacket as he turns to Richie
"Tell me when we're going to sort out those bearded wearing flannel ass wipes"
Carmen shakes his head with a smile, before nodding and pushing past the kitchen doors. The traffic lights better be green green fuckin' green tonight.
You were stripped to a singlet and sleeping shorts as you knelt over the toilet, blinking back exhausted tears at the state of you.
You suppose you have no one else to blame but yourself, but the indignation righteousness burns almost as bright as the acid reflux crawling up your throat.
You hear the faint opening and loud clang of the apartment door opening and closing and you sigh in relief as you hear the familiar footfalls of Carmen down the hall.
It had felt damn near torturous suffering without him, and as he calls out to you following the trail of loose clothing he spots your figure in the bathroom sprawled.
"Oh honey, I'm sorry" Carmen says
And it was as if your body needed to finally feel safe in Carmen's presence before you felt the nausea spill out of you and splash offensively into the toilet.
You feel Carmen crouch above you, dragging your hair that had gone loose from it's wrapped up do away from your face. Gently rubbing your back, his large hands softly dipping up and down your spine.
"That's it, 'atta girl. Let it all out" Carmen coo's softly
You purged the insides of your stomach into the toilet bowl, retching loudly with every heave as Carmen comforted you. After what seemed like hours, and the nausea had subsided Carmen carefully wrapped his arms up under your armpits picking you up of the floor.
"Slowly, yeah? You damn near emptied out you're entire water content" Carmen murmurs, flushing the toilet and helping you walk to the basin and wash out the taste of bile from your mouth.
"I probably look insane" You cry out, blinking back exhaustion from your eyes as Carmen shakes his head furiously.
"Never, my pretty girl. Need you to go easy okay? Gonna take you to bed and let you sleep through it. Can't have you collapsing on me" Carmen murmurs, wiping at the edge of your mouth, patting the sweat that stuck to your forehead.
You let Carmen carefully maneuver your body, one arm under your legs and the other supporting your back walking to the bedroom. Your wring dry and can barely keep your eyes open as Carmen placed you on the cool sheets you immediately moan at.
You hear the faint rustle of movement as Carmen brings in a paper bag. The clunk of bottles placed on the bedside table as you sing praise for the very short bit of relief you have before the next bout of nausea rolls in.
Carmen pads to the adjacent bathroom, the door opened so you can see the stream of light that illuminates him. Hes running a cloth under water, squeezing the excess and looking up to check on you every so often.
He looked so...domestic, like he hadn't come back from working at one of the most decorated restaurants in Chicago. Stripped of his shirt so he stood bare chested, golden curls pushed behind his ears, sweatpants hung low on his hips and the furrow of his eyebrows in concentration and worry.
Your eyes flutter shut as you thank the midnight sky for bringing him to you, for keeping him for you, this one good thing that was yours.
The skies answer by the sound of his voice listing off all the things you will not be doing in this stage of recovery. Sitting on the edge of the bed as he places the cool rag against your forehead, lips between teeth as he feels your temperature under his skin.
"Just bone broth, Gatorade and bread sticks for you, doll. And no, before you even think it, its not the garlic ones." Carmen tsks.
You were thinking it. He knew you too well, but when he kisses your eyelids and measures out careful tips of the Gatorade bottle, you don't mind it.
nights like these were harder when you weren’t around. carmy hates to think about what he’d do if you weren’t here.
and he doesn’t have to, cause your lips are on his and his hands are gripping and grabbing at your waist, pulling you closer to him. on your sides, you have to tangle your legs together to get as close as you both want, a never-sated need growing stronger as you curl naturally into each other.
pulling away, you cast your loving eyes over his face, his eyes heavy and curls messy, framing his face so pretty, even in the low light. he’s the first to connect your lips again, kissing you firm and wanting. you feel his hands start to wander, one moving down and one moving up, both headed towards separate goals.
his familiar hands find your leg that’s thrown over his waist and your cheek to rub softly, adoringly. he’s in love.
“you’re so beautiful,” carmen whispers, and his hand on your leg moves to your other cheek, your face cradled between his big hands.
you smile, wrapping your hand around his wrist, moving to kiss his hand and then him again. “so are you.”
and carmen smiles, really smiles, his cheeks heating up and body buzzing with the way you make him feel at home, make his mind slow down and his heart stop aching.
closer still he moves, eyes fixed on your slick and parted lips as you nod. he closes the gap this time, kissing you soft and slow. it’s desperate, and lovesick, and he’s calm now, and the heaviness of sleep is fading into the corners of his mind. seconds fade into minutes, and you both don’t even care how long it’s been, the concept of time the farthest thing from your minds.
you kiss and pull away, kiss more and then separate again, and each time your lips connect again, carmy feels himself sink away from whatever was causing him to stay awake.
he pulls away and his eyes say what his mouth doesn’t have to. smiling, you place a kiss on his nose and another on his cheek.
“you okay?” you ask.
“yeah. i’m okay now.”
your body heats up and you gaze at him with a look he knows so well. “good.” is all you say. you yawn dramatically, stretching your arm up and huffing out a laugh when carmy catches your arm and kisses your hand like you did to his earlier.
you tilt him toward you with your wrist still in his grip, and he finishes your movement, resting his head on your chest, sighing at the feel of your fingers threading into his curls.
nights like these were hard when you weren’t around. he finds peace with you, cause they don’t have to be anymore.
a/n: merry Christmas y'all! This is a VERY rough draft lmao
The Beef closed early on Christmas Eve, giving you and Carmy some time together before Christmas Day. While the both of you had off for Christmas, you knew that it wouldn't be peaceful. You had stupidly agreed to spend Christmas with both of your families, the morning would be spent with yours and the evening spent with his. You’d be going to Sugar’s house for dinner with practically his entire family.
“Y’know it’s gonna be a shitshow,” He warned softly as you held the phone to your ear, listening to Sugar’s invitation.
“We’ll be there!” You answered, giving Carmy a cheerful smile.
So, you promised that Christmas Eve would be only for the two of you. While Carmy was at the Beef, you got the apartment ready for your Christmas movie marathon.
You had just finished wrapping his gift when you heard his footsteps in the doorway. You hurried to throw it under the tree as he walked in.
You suspiciously jumped up from the ground and ran over to him, “hi! How was work?” you wrapped you arms around him and he placed his firm hands on your sides.
He didn’t question your weird behavior as he knew had something to do with Christmas,“Awful, there was practically a rush all day,” he greeted you with a kiss, “let’s not talk about work anymore.”
“Are you ready to get festive?” You asked excitedly. It was Christmas, your favorite time of the year. Unfortunately, neither of you were able to get in spirit up until now due to your crazy work schedules. You just finished putting all the ornaments and wrapping all the gift only for it all to be over tomorrow. 
“I’ve been looking forward to this all day,” he sighed with content as he stroked your cheek with his thumb. He wasn’t lying, this was the first time a Christmas celebration of his would be peaceful, “let me take a shower first and then we’ll start our first movie?”
While Carmy showered, you popped some popcorn and queued the first movie The Ref, your favorite.
Eventually, you heard the water shut off, “The pjs on the bed are for you!” You called out, referencing the matching pajamas you bought.
“Ah,” he responded. Wanting to be a good sport, he put the outfit on without a fight. It’s just us it’s just us he told himself.
“Aw so cute!” You cooed. He walked into the living room wearing the same Christmas Story pink bunny onesie as you.
“I’m glad you think so,” he shook his head. Never in a million years would he think that anyone could get him to wear something like this. Something about you was different, he didn’t mind looking stupid as long as he was with you.
The two of you got snuggled up on the couch and started binging, only pausing to grab the food you ordered in.
This day would quickly become one of your favorite memories together. While some couples planned date nights, the two of you had to plan out nights in. Your shared longing for relaxation together was finally fulfilled this one day.
“Merry Christmas,” he pressed a kiss onto your forehead and nodded to the cable box that flashed 12:00. You had truly spent all of Christmas Eve together on the couch and you wouldn’t have had it any other way.
“Merry Christmas,” you tilted your neck up to kiss him. He deepened the kiss and you almost lost focus, nearly forgetting your 12:00 plans, “wait, I have a present for you.”
Carmy lifted an eyebrow, “yeah?” You knew he wasn’t thinking about the type of gift you were.
“Under the tree!” You playfully swatted at him.
You both sat cross legged in front of the tree, holding the gifts you got each other.
Carmy timidly handed you your gift first, “I hope you like them.” He ran his hand through his hair.
You carefully opened the delicate packaging to find the prettiest pair of earrings you’ve ever seen. They had your birthstone dangling in the center beautifully.
“Oh my God Carmy,” you gasped. You probably mentioned wanting earrings twice yet he still picked up on it. Honestly, you knew you would love any gift from him but to see how much he cares is better than anything he could’ve given you.
“You like them?” He felt a wave of relief wash over him.
“I love them Carmy thank you,” you kissed him, “now open your gift!”
Carmy was used to solely receiving gifts related to cooking. Whether it be knives, cook books from influencers he knew nothing about, aprons or useless kitchen gadgets with the one purpose of collecting dust, he’s gotten it for Christmas.
When picking out a gift for Carmy you knew not to get him anything that would suggest change to his system in the kitchen. So, you decided to get him a gift based on a different interest of his.
“Is this?” Carmy held up his gift in front him to get a better look. It was a leather jacket with patches on it.
“I hope so?” You prayed your research did you well. You knew virtually nothing about vintage clothing, “did I do good?”
He knew exactly what it was. It was a piece he’s dreamt of owning for years but never treated himself to buying.
I just KNOW Carmen would be such a soft and amazing dad. 100% would make sure in between the restaurant to be there for you, and be there for his little cubs (doesn’t want things to go in the same vain it did with his lack of relationship with his dad) Even if working at the restaurant is one of his biggest priorities, you know he is absolutely taking time off in the last few months before your little girl or boy arrives (A strong supporter of Carmy being a girl dad). You’d have to physically and gently pry your baby from his arms because he can’t stop kissing them and pressing his nose against their little cheek 😭
oh my god, all the discourse about girl dad/boy dad on tiktok and i'm just like in the dictionary in MY universe carmen's photos is right under girl dad. carmen would be an amazing father regardless, but when he finds out hes getting a little girl???
He's buying her every single toy that could possible exist. It's just all pressed up against his chest at the checkout line no trolley nothing. Just straight cave man energy must..get..babygirl..things...
He's inconsolable when she comes, just straight up hiccuping and crying as the nurses try to get her out of his goddamn death grip. It's like your baby needs a bath and Carmen is like holding up against his pale ass bare chest like get out of my fucking face with that.
he's probably tricking Richie to come over under the guise of your god tier baked goods that never make it past the first minute of family - JUST to build his in utero baby girl a tree house. for you know, the 6 years that will come up.
"Alright, alright" Richie grins, rubbing his hands together as Carmen pulls into the drive way. He's damn near halfway out the car door before Carmen can kill the engine and if it was anyone but Cousin, Carmen would've attempted to hide his grin.
"Blessed thee, you absolute angel" Richie calls out as he opens the door. You poke your head out from under the load of laundry you've been trying to sort - the aching dullness at your hips preventing you so.
"Rich? What are you doing here?" You say, eyebrows quirking up at his sudden arrival.
"Funny too! You really got yourself a catch" Richie laughs, playfully jabbing at Carmen.
You look towards him, clocking your head at the grin that's begun to take up half of Carmen's face. You knew that look, what did he do?
"You know I didn't even get a piece at family last week? Fuckin' gremlins matter of fact I have to get back to the Bear soon, got a couple catering orders to organise. Least it isn't for Cicero's daughters best friend's dog or some shit" Richie mutters, and you can't help but hie the giggle before you straighten out.
Someone had to be the adult here, right?
"Is it in like a tupperware or..?" Richie replies when the puzzled look on your face remains
"What is?"
"Those cinnamon pastry thingies you always make" Richie replies, slowly turning to Carmen, than back to you
"Carm told me you made a little extra"
"Oh Richie" You sigh
"Don't..no. Cousin." Richie hands raise up to his temples, pinching the line that formed from believing a word out of Carmen's mouth.
"Don't tell me you lied" Richie quickly twists his body to point at Carmen
"I knew it was too good, I should have known.."
"Relax, it's for the greater good"
"What greater good? Do you know you deliberately contributed to a mans starvation?"
"You can't lie to a man that's going through those stages Cousin! No, no you don't get it!"
"Aye relax"
"You..you're a fucking mirage. That's what this is" Richie chuckles, shaking his head.
A silence falls over the three of you, and as your eyes meet Carmen you can't help the smile that creeps onto your face.
"So are you going to tell me why I'm here??" Richie yells suddenly.
"Yeah, I wanna build something for my future child that my wife is going to bring into this world. You know, something that's more important than fucking cinnamon buns
"Cinnamon twists" Richie murmurs softly, eyes glazed over, and if you squint it looks like a tear has actually squeezed out.
"Let him mourn Carm" You reply, gently rubbing Richie crouched figure.
Carmen shakes his head, rolling his eyes as he waits all of 5 seconds before his patience wears into an annoyed grunt.
"Alright what does my future niece need" Richie sighs
"Carmen we've already got the changing table and bassinet ready" You continue, running through the list of baby things that had begun to take up all the 'open space layout' you're house had. How much more things could you need?.
"Was doing some work out the back, and doesn't that tree we have close to the fence have a real good foundation" Carmen murmurs
"What are you saying?" Richie yoans
"My babygirl would want a tree house
"Carm-
"Just listen, I know her, half of her at least. And I wanted one the moment I could climb a tree. So naturally she would want one alright? And, and so it's like I'm just having it ready for when she needs it.
"Oh my god"
"What?"
"She isn't even here yet!"
"Don't remind me" Carmen grunts, genuinely grunts out.
"Carm, she'll be crawling for like so long" Richie interjects
"You don't know her" Carmen replies quickly, throwing accusatory eyes at Richie
"You think my baby girl won't be able to crawl in a tree house? I'm feeling a lot of negative energy I don't like"
"Besides, I already bought the wood. And everything else" Carmen murmurs
"I'm doing this for her Cousin, her!" Richie replies
"What about the catering order Rich?" You quirk, he had just stop rambling about it.
"Ah don't worry about it hun. Anything for my god daughter" Richie grins. Throwing his hand behind him for full effect.
"You can't be her god father and her uncle Cousin" Carmen replies
"Why the hell not-"
Richie is interrupted by the slight wince that leaves your mouth and has you ripping the counter and holding your sides.
Carmen moves towards you in a flash, gripping your sides softly as his eyes furrow in concern.
"You okay baby?"
You breathe out through your nose forcefully
"Just feelin sore, I'm alright"
"You don't want me doing the tree house? Done. It's over. Richie get the fuck out my house" Carmen yells out the last part
"Hey!"
"No, no do it. You're probably right"
"Bout what?"
"Every kid wants a fucking tree house"
Carmen carries you to the bathroom, with direct orders to soak in the tub for at least an hour while your child's metaphorical tree house is built.
You can hear the consistent argue of Richie and Carmen filter through the bathroom window even over the grating sound of sawing wood. You love it every bit, and as you kiss Richie goodbye, you slide a container of your cinnamon twists into his hand.
He turns around, the biggest smile you think you had ever scene on his face as he throws the finger at Carm, and takes off running out the door before he can react.
