#carmiri

[cmlmrbl]

🦚Miriam: If you see my ex primonovio (🦉Carmelo) at pride, don't tell me. I already KNOW 🙄

[green-mochi-blog]

Miriam: I'm proud to identify as a moronsexual. I'm attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively

Carmelo: *chewing an arepa* Miri, what kind of tree does corn grow from?

Miriam: *taking off her dress* that's it. Pants off, papito

[green-mochi-blog]

Miriam: my tastes are very refined. I will only accept the person who meets all my standards.

Carmelo: *falls asleep at the table with his face stuck in his bowl of soup*

Miriam: ... I want him. Right now

[green-mochi-blog]

Miriam: what happened?

Carmelo: nothing!

Miriam: you sat on the toilet and didn't notice that the seat was up, did you?

Carmelo: my knees hit my neck, it was awful

[green-mochi-blog]

[During sex]

🦚: hurt me

🦉: in 1992, scientist discovered the loneliest creature on earth

🦚: what?

🦉: Its a whale that has been calling for a mate for two decades. He communicates at a frequency not used by any other whales, and hasn't received a response

🦚: stop!

[cmlmrbl]

🦉 Carmelo: How do tall people people possibly sleep at night when the blanket can't possibly cover you?

🦚 Miriam: Mi vida please, it's four o'clock in the morning.

🦉 Carmelo: So, you can't sleep, huh? Is it because of the blanket?