Tell me some angsty Brutecass/Brutia/Cassportus headcanons. Make me suffer.
Okay. You asked for it. The angst floodgates have been opened.
Porcia always was the mediator/strength for Brutus and Cassius, and she always had a feeling of needing to protect them and stay strong for them. She managed to remain relatively calm after leaving Rome until the night before her men left for the war she broke down in front of them.
Brutus always had trouble saying “I love you” and despite showing it in other ways he always felt he didn’t tell Porcia and Cassius that he loved them enough.
While they were camped out in the Senate chamber for four days after the assassination, unable to go home, Brutus and Cassius obviously couldn’t show any affection. Cassius was always extremely needy and he hated not being hugged or kissed. He had never realized how much he needed attention until then.
Brutus didn’t cry when he found out Porcia died until he was alone that night. He didn’t want to cry in front of Cassius because he thought it would just upset Cassius more.
When Cassius said “Portia, art thou gone?” in the play, it was because he couldn’t comprehend her being gone. He always assumed he would be the first of the three to die.
Porcia never told Cassius about the wound in her thigh. She made up some excuse when he saw it.
Porcia often called Brutus “Hector” as a joke from when she was younger and associated him with the prince of Troy. Brutus took to calling her “Andromache.” It was only later that she realized how true this was.
Brutus and Porcia were both married to other people before their marriage. Porcia was a sort of Innocent Political Ally Trophy Wife for Bibulus and while he treated her well, they were never in love. Brutus’s marriage to Claudia had been decent but had no love either. Both Brutus and Porcia had though they’d never actually have love and that was just how life was for them. Then they fell in love. Brutus always regretted that their time together had been so short.
Cassius died alone except for Pindarus. His last thought was a prayer that Brutus did not also die alone.
Going on with the last one, Brutus mourned Cassius for a long time, staying with his body and holding it, crying. In part he was transferring the grief he would have gone through had he been with Porcia when she died, because now he could hold his other love, who also was dead. It was this point that Brutus realized he was alone in the universe.
The most terrifying moment of Porcia’s life was when Brutus snapped before he told her about the conspiracy. He didn’t become abusive, but he did tell her to leave him alone and she began to worry he no longer loved her.
Marcus Cato and Brutus both struggled with guilt over Porcia’s death, each initially blaming the other for not taking care of his sister/his wife. They came to terms a day before Marcus was killed.
Cassius always slept weird, and he had a habit of waking up, looking around, and going back to sleep. He often used this moment of alertness to make sure Brutus and Porcia, beside him in bed, were okay.
You’re welcome.