don’t mind me, just thinking about castellan!reader with porch light by noah kahan ...
⤷⠀castellan!reader who would ask luke how he’s been but everyone already knows he came back from his quest different
⤷⠀castellan!reader who can never be sure if their brother is talking to them to make sure they aren’t dead or if he’s looking for an apology
⤷⠀castellan!reader who consistently gave him the benefit of the doubt until they really didn’t have that option anymore
⤷⠀castellan!reader who tries to stick to ‘lighter’ topics with their brother, but it always devolves into luke preaching against the gods
⤷⠀castellan!reader who knows they should shut it down and talk him out of that line of thinking. who regrets not doing so years later.
⤷⠀castellan!reader who’s too scared to be truly alone—because if they can lose their full sibling, there must be nobody they can’t lose
⤷⠀castellan!reader who hopes every time luke talks to them that he’ll tell them he’s winding down
⤷⠀castellan!reader who hopes in vain that luke will tire of the fame, the glory, the hunt for power, and finally call it quits
⤷⠀castellan!reader who slowly gets more annoyed at their brother, because he acts like they’re just waiting for him to come around
⤷⠀castellan!reader who knows they kind of are, but snaps that they can’t just wait because they still have to do all the things luke left them alone with
⤷⠀castellan!reader who tries to drown out the gossip of other campers, the stares they get whenever someone thinks of their last name
⤷⠀castellan!reader who tells people luke doesn’t really want them, but they’ll still forever be blamed for his actions
⤷⠀castellan!reader who can feel their beloved older brother fading away from them until he’s no more than ghost
⤷⠀castellan!reader who chokes on the poison luke’s name spreads into their lungs even years after his betrayal
⤷⠀castellan!reader who can’t really bring themself to believe in their brother’s redemption, but prays and suffers for it all the same
⤷⠀castellan!reader who always left the porch light of cabin eleven on, just in case luke would come back for them
⤷⠀castellan!reader who broke their own heart every morning when they had to be the one to turn it off
⤷⠀castellan!reader who unknowingly makes hermes suffer for another child because they take after their father and just can’t let luke go
⤷⠀castellan!reader whose string was woven by the fates long ago as they whispered, “so it goes, so it goes, so it goes ...”
