And I think I initially intended it so I could insert more historical romance vibes into my boring daily life, but I'm belatedly realizing now that vibe I've actually created is less maiden in a fancy gown writing with a quill pen, and more, Gollum.
"Mustn't go outside today, my loves, the heat is so nasties."
"What is it that is inside your little mouthy, my love??"
"Spit it out, my love, spit it out!"
"Ah, I see we have cronched a bug, my love. It was cronchy, yes? But we mustn't eat them."
"We mustn't be on the countertop, my love!"
"Such lovely fish breath today, my love."
"That is indeed a lovely butthole, my love. Thank you for showing me."
"Here you go, my loves: wet, warm, and juicy!" (as I give them lightly heated canned food)
"What a most pungent stink, my love. Did you have a nice shit?"
"You claws are like needles, my love. They are sinking into me tiddy."