💀 :)
tw: death
It was funny how things suddenly felt like they were moving in slow motion. The words that were coming out of the nurse’s mouth were something he should have been paying attention to, but he couldn’t focus on anything because suddenly nothing mattered anymore. This was a joke, an elaborate prank pulled together by Celeste and Pres and maybe Nic was even in on it, because he was sure he’d been kind of a little shit lately and must have deserved it. That had to be the case.
The evidence for that got thinner and thinner as a series of hospital workers approached him--Doctors and nurses, caseworkers, insurance, billing... he wasn’t enough of an adult for this. He didn’t know what half of the paperwork he was having to sign even really meant, but it was being thrust under his nose and taken away almost as quickly. And everything came crashing back down whenever someone had asked him where he wanted to send the body.
The body.
He couldn’t speak, his mouth hung open and slack as he stared at the one who’d asked. How fucking dare you, the voice in his head screamed at the man in the lab coat. She’s my wife, not just ‘the body.’ The inability to answer might have been the best option for him, since a war was breaking out in his mind. There were pamphlets shoved into his fist and he was walked out to the curb in front of the hospital. Time lost all meaning as he stood there and eventually Nic showed up, coaxed him to finally move and get into the car so they could go back to the hotel.
He couldn’t stay in his suite, not when it held all their memories, all of their stuff. Not when it was going to be so dreadfully empty again. He packed a backpack with as much as he wanted to shove in it and walked up the stairs to the floor above, stopping at Nic’s suite and knocking on the door
Beckett didn’t say a word for two whole days.
When he finally spoke, it was the morning of the funeral. He wore the suit that he’d worn the night he took her to prom, this time with a blue tie instead of a red one. Everyone that had put up with him in the past two days had been too nice. It was obvious that he was breaking down, his world was crashing in around him, and he was quickly losing whatever will he had left to go on. But as he was going through his bag, looking for the cufflinks she’d given him at their wedding, a folded piece of paper fell out. It was their vows, where they’d promised to love each other no matter what, come literal hell or high water.
Lia was the one that found him and whenever she asked if he was ready, he shrugged and cleared his throat. “I don’t think I’ll ever be ready. But she deserves my best, and these past two days weren’t that. I made a promise, and I’ve gotta stick to it.”
