#ceolbert.......my precious boy...........

[lurakha]

ASSASSIN'S CREED VALHALLA (∞)

[rayless-reblogs]

I love Ceolbert, he's one of my favorite npcs in this game. He looks like this little dweeb, and he is, but he speaks in this very deep, scholarly voice because he's also very smart and determined. He wants to do the right thing, but all his friends are amoral Vikings. I feel like me and my weird friend Ivarr the Boneless are his parents now, and he's so precious to both of us. We're going to make him a great king. I really hope nothing bad happens to him.

Anyway, here we are fishing. He really wanted to fish that evening and he wanted me to join him. I know he's frowning here, but this lad is having a great time.

Unfortunately, I am like 40, 50+ hours into the game and I'm not sure I've built my fishing hut and doubt I even own a fishing pole. Most games, giving you this non-optional, unskippable minigame, would have a second pole propped up somewhere in the vicinity. AC Valhalla does not.

I had to pull out my bow and arrow and arch fish out of the river.

Still, a good time was had by all. I look forward to a long and rewarding life of helping you do great things, my dear boy.

[camdentown-library]

Ivarr Ragnarsson || NSFW headcanons

( GIF by  ugh-my-back  )

𝕺𝖍, 𝖆 𝖇𝖔𝖔𝖐 𝖋𝖊𝖑𝖑 𝖔𝖋𝖋 𝖆 𝖘𝖍𝖊𝖑𝖋, 𝖜𝖍𝖆𝖙 𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝖎𝖙 𝖇𝖊?

Requested? Would you up to write some spicy NSfW headcanons for out good boy Ivarr with your godly writing skills? 🤔 -anon Omg I love the nsfw hc with Sigurd❤ But now I think about nsfw hc with Ivarr😏 -anon

Well well, let's start well.

Ivarr Ragnarsson, a fierce man and certainly not remembered for his romanticism.

Let's say that as far as the romantic sphere is concerned, this drengr is really bad in this matter. Love? He? Eww no thanks, next offer.

If there is only one way to emotionally bond with Ivarr, the options are minimal: either you are battlemates, or you have sex.

Ivarr is not a man who likes to go around things, if he likes you and he is aware that you both enjoy each other's presence, he will have no problem telling you crudely about having sex.

Like: "Forget these ballless drengr, Y/N. Let's go have a good fuck in my tent."

Or: "If you hear a scream in the distance in the forest it is I who take Y/N against a log"

Ivarr would be very proud of his adventures under the sheets. And he doesn't care if you get embarrassed during those speeches.

"Ah you had to see her, a fucking Valkyrie riding me like I was a mad stallion, all out of your reach Eivor"

Ivarr would immediately make it clear that between you and him there is nothing romantic that binds you, except your physical appearance ...

BUT, when he sees you talking to other men or women he immediately becomes jealous and would become very unfriendly and threatening.

But let's get to the core of this speech: WHAT DOES IVARR LIKE?

Ivarr does not seem to mind the opinion of others, especially if this involves scandalizing poor Christian passers-by or Ceolbert, LMAO.

Any and I mean any place can be suitable for a fuck.

Whether it's a cave, a hill, by a lake, in an abandoned castle, it's okay for Ivarr to be approved.

Speaking of places, Ivarr to a dirty little secret about one in particular: The Christian Church.

Take you from behind on a church altar and outrage their precious and sacred holy God is the most aphrodisiac thing on Ivarr's mind.

Speaking of aphrodisiacs, Ivarr loves your body and loves branding it.

And I'm not talking about poor suckers ... pffft jeez open your mind.

Making your buttocks red and livid from slaps.

Fill your feel, your belly, your hips with bites.

Leave on your back full of scratches.

Better for you to support the pain otherwise with Ivarr you will not get very far.

Ivarr also seems to love to upset people and therefore in my opinion this man is full of kink.

Knife play: 100% sure, I could bet a hand knowing I was right.

Bdsm: I think he would love to tie you up and even blindfold you sometimes, torture you with slow and grueling foreplays and then fuck you when your body is exhausted and unable to react.

His pace would always be fast and rough, Ivarr loves hearing you scream, he loves taking you to physical limits, he loves having sex with you even without foreplay ... in short, there must always be a hint of pain in that theater of pleasure.

Something he doesn't like? Don't dominate it, don't do it I mean it ... I mean it for your health and for your life LMAO this guy is as crazy as a top

Another thing he doesn't like is sharing, don't ask him to have a threesome, rest assured that the third wheel will soon meet Hel's doors.