#christopherroles

[armedwithaheart]

One day, I will be residing in a small cabin on the shore. My eyes, like the lens's of an old film camera, capturing the beauty in the still. Life will be beautiful then.

[armedwithaheart]

This world is not my home, I’m just passing through

[armedwithaheart]

Been going through the battle again.. the one of whether or not I’d be better off in the cold ground, or maybe my ashes shipped out to sea to be buried, or scattered from a lighthouse to drift in the wind and fly among the birds. I put my sidearm to my temple a few years back. Of course I’m still here, but it happened. I can’t deny that. I often wonder why I didn’t do it. I know why, but that will die with me. But I do wonder if there is more to it than that. I don’t know. Just some driveway talk.

[armedwithaheart]

“Why you left me here for another.”

Some days I hate everything and everyone. There’ll be days where I just want to be left alone and just be by myself. There are times where I just sit at the park on the swings and think about where I fucked up. There are times where I’m there thinking about how you fucked up. 

[armedwithaheart]

Being Straight Edge and...

I wonder if anyone thinks it’s weird that I’m Straight Edge and one of my top 5 favorite movies is Dazed and Confused...

[armedwithaheart]

Best birthday in a long time...

Well, that was one of the best birthdays that I have had in a long time. I wish I would have heard from a few more people, but you can't win all the time. Thanks to those who remembered! And thanks to those who are still by my side.

[armedwithaheart]

Forgive Me

I’m not perfect, I never claimed to be. I have many issues that I have to deal with on a daily basis. I have anger issues, I have depression, high anxiety, O.C.D and I struggling with controlling issues. I am doing my best to fix these issues, but I don’t always succeed. I know that I may not be the best person to be around, but I try to be. I don’t mean to bring others down, but sometimes my thoughts get the best of me. I appreciate all of those that stick by my side through it all. I love you and thank you for accepting me and acknowledging that I am only human. 

-Topher Roles 

[armedwithaheart]

I’m not quite sure that you feel the same way as I do.

And that’s completely fine. 

I’ve watched you fall.

I’ve watched you cry at 5 A.M.

I’ve watched you smile throughout some of the darkest times.

Your words still linger in my mind the same as the countless times I’ve held your hand.

Your soul is as beautiful as the rising of the sun.

And your voice is the music to my ears.

I hope you’re well.

I hope you’re happy.

You deserve all the happiness.