touched grass today, it was very nice.
the breeze was soft and cool, with a nice warm sun that was just hot enough to keep a chill away. saw a green heron, i love identifying the birds i see out on my fishing trips with j. despite my slow burning out from being alone for a few hours (im not used to the solitude anymore), it was a magnificent day. read my book, listened to some tunes and played puzzle games on the car ride home. listened to the boys argue over video game semantics, went to a new place ive always seen on my way to work and never went in. came home to play the sims and clean the dirt off my shins. now im in bed waiting for j to get out of the shower for some long day decompression cuddles.
i thought a lot today about the serenity of nature and my tendency to be frustrated at the things outside that make me uncomfortable, like bugs and heat. i often forget that there is beauty in the world that i miss for the safety of familiarity and comfort. but the little bees licking sweat off my skin and the dragonflies stopping their flights for a moment meant no harm, just needed something like i did. food and rest and a way along the path. maybe it isn't so bad.