" you don't have to protect me all the time. " she's... mad? oh, more than that. she's furious, actually. this isn't likely to end well. [hello you asked for this too rip chester]
i’m @citysplit // I SURE DID thank you
He can tell that he fucked up. He probably messed up many times before and this is just the last straw, but either way -- he’s screwed. Very, entirely, utterly screwed.
Chester isn’t sure he’s ever seen her this mad. Or maybe he just never was back from repairs soon enough to notice, or maybe she just kept her anger inside until she could yell at him.
Technically he knows that she’s right. She went to the academy, she graduated, she rose up, she’s fantastic at what she does. Certainly Ari doesn’t need him to protect her. “I know”, he says quietly. He does know.
But still, he can’t help it, can’t deny the urge to jump between her and any possible danger that comes across them. He doesn’t have to protect her but he wants to. The thought of seeing her hurt or even worse is too much to bear, he doesn’t want to imagine the pain when it becomes more than just a thought. More than just a possible outcome to a preconstruction.
“I’m sorry.” What he isn’t sorry for, is putting her life before his, but he is sorry for making her feel like this. She’s capable, he knows that. He wants to leave her be but he loves her. There’s a long way up ahead for him to realize that she doesn’t want to see him hurt either, but at the moment he doesn’t know and he doesn’t care. At this point he’s more scrap parts than original hardware and that’s fine by him as long as he keeps his memories. Nothing else matters.
“I’m just a machine, put together from scrap parts with a supercomputer for a brain. I can be repaired, I can even turn off my pain receptors. I’m not a human, Ari. I don’t die like you could. I’ll just be put together again.” But she won’t. Humans are fragile, they get hurt, they scar, they damage, they die. And he wants none of that for her. Never.
“But I really am sorry for making you feel like I doubt your abilities. I don’t. You’re brilliant! I just--”
He can’t even look at her, his hands shaking at his sides where they play with the hem of his sweater. Why do emotions have to be so hard? He hates this so so so much.
“I’m scared, Ari. I’m scared of losing you.”