35 61 need me some baby clexa!!!
About the baby… it’s yours + You’d be a great mom
You’re special to me + you own my heart
The beeping of the dual monitors disturbed the air just enough to stop Lexa from drifting off, hyper vigilant for any sounds of distress.
“Hey,” Clarke crooned, voice hoarse from disuse. “You should be sleeping.” She slid her hand along the hospital bed to interlock her fingers with her wife. “I can scoot over if you want to climb in.”
“You should be sleeping, love,” Lexa replies, leaning forward to press a soft kiss to her wife’s knuckles. “You just gave birth.”
“We both need sleep, Lex. Our baby gets her penchants for dramatic yelling from you.”
“Yeah, but she gets the grumpiness from you.”
“I’m as happy as can be,” Clarke whispered, feigning annoyance.
“Me, too,” Lexa replied, even as her voice hitched. Emotion choked her as she replayed the last forty-eight hours in her head.
...
It all started when Clarke and Lexa were having it out in the kitchen.
“You’re never home!”
“I’m literally home right now, Clarke,” Lexa said with as much patience as she could muster.
“Yes, and you’ve been working this entire time! Just like every other day for the past eight months. We have a baby coming, Lexa and I feel more like a single mom than I do a wife.”
Lexa groaned. “Clarke, we’ve talked about this. I promise I’ll cut back on work once the baby gets here, but you just need to give me some space! I’m doing this for us and you’re being-!”
“Lex-“
“No, Clarke, I’m tired of you guilting me with this! I’m only doing this so you me and the baby will be okay. I’m thinking about our future. They’ll be here in one more month and I just need to prepare.”
“No, Lex -“
“You just make me feel like-”
Clarke gripped the counter with white knuckles and paling face. She wheezed, lightheaded. “Lexa... Something’s wrong!”
“What?!” Lexa spun around just in time to catch Clarke before she fell. Clarke’s water broke seconds later.
“Clarke? Clarke?! Clarke, no. Shit, no, no, no!”
Lexa didn’t feel anything after that. Her body was so overcome with fear that she could only remember going through the motions of carrying Clarke to the passenger seat and jumping behind the wheel of her car.
“Fuck, I swear, God, if you get us through this I promise I will be better. I promise I’ll be there. I promise, I promise.”
Clarke clutched at her stomach and whimpered as she sped through the traffic. “Hold on, Clarke, we’re almost there, okay? We’ll be there soon.”
As they waited for the doctor, her wife sweat and screamed and cried, and Lexa could do nothing but hold onto Clarke’s hand while the nurses bustled around her.
Clarke’s voice cracked with defeat, “I can’t - I can’t - I'm Scared, Lexa.”
“I got you, Clarke. I’m not going anywhere and soon our little boy or girl will be here and it’ll all be worth it.” She tried you force a smile to hide just how scared she was, too.
Everything turned for the worse mere, horrifying, seconds later. The doctors and nurses made the decision to take her in for an emergency C-section. Lexa was being bustled into scrubs and prepped for watching her wife be operated on. She held her breath until she heard the first cry of her baby, but before she could even blink, Clarke’s monitor beeped wildly and her grasp went limp in Lexa’s hands.
“She’s losing too much blood,” Lexa heard.
“Madi,” was all Clarke managed to get out before Lexa was being pushed away from her. Lexa was outside the grey steel doors of the operating room before she could process what had happened.
So she paced.
And paced.
And paced.
Anya crashed into Lexa in the waiting room less than an hour later, and it knocked something loose inside her - sobs exploded from her chest. “They just took her! They took her and the baby and I didn’t even get to hold her. I didn’t get to hold either of them and-and-what if…”
Anya pulled back and squeezed Lexa by her shoulder, strong grip trying to ground Lexa before she got too lost in her despair. “Lexa. She’s strong. They both are. Don’t worry about the baby… it’s yours. It’s a fighter.”
“She.”
“Pardon me,” Anya asked, a wide grin slowly taking over her features. She squeezed her sister tighter. “She’s a fighter.”
“Madi,” Lexa sighed out.
“Madi’s going to be such a badass, you watch.”
“Mrs. Woods?” A voice interrupted.
Lexa hastened to wipe the tears still spilling From her eyes and turned to meet one of the orderlies.
“I’m so sorry to interrupt, but I wanted to let you know that your wife is out of surgery - everything went well. We’re still in the process of moving her to the recovery room, but Madi’s been moved to the NICU, if you want to meet her.”
Anya excitedly clapped Lexa on her back as Lexa let out a watery sigh of relief. “Time to go meet your daughter.”
...
Lexa stood outside of the NICU, tears staining her cheeks. “She’s so small.”
“She’s a fighter,” Anya repeated.
Lexa choked on a sob. “I almost lost her today.”
“She’s okay, Lexa.”
“I mean Clarke. I caused this. We were fighting and I- I was - I’ve been stressing her out and I was a jerk.”
“Listen to me, Clarke loves you. All she wants is for you to understand that. She wants you around more because she loves you. And that little girl in there,” Anya pointed to the wiggling baby inside the NICU, “is so lucky to have you two as her moms. Clarke is safe and in a few days all three of you will go home and live happily ever after. Just be grateful this didn’t turn out worse.”
Lexa stared at her daughter, her guilty mind making her entire body hurt.
“Mrs. Woods, your wife is awake.” The same orderly quietly spoke. “She's asking for you.”
…
“Hey, Clarke,” Lexa said, immediately rushing to her wife’s side the second that she entered. “Anya went to get you some food.”
“Hi,” Clarke whispered. “How’s Madi?”
“She’s okay. How are you?” Lexa’s voice was strained with the emotion she held back.
Clarke reached for her wife’s hand and squeezed her knuckles once they interlaced their fingers. That was all it took before Lexa broke down in harsh, violent sobs.
Clarke tugged her hand until Lexa’s body was against hers, holding her head to her chest as Lexa cried in her arms. “I’m so sorry, Clarke, I didn’t -“
“Shhhh, hey, no, Lexa don’t do that.”
Red rimmed eyes met tired blue ones. “I could have lost you,”
“But you didn’t. And, we got to meet our little girl today. I’m so happy, Lexa.” Clarke’s smile was tired but warm. Lexa sniffed against her chest, calming down under the ministrations of Clarke’s fingers along her spine. “Be happy with me. Today is a good day.”
“I’m sorry,” Lexa said. “You were right about me working too much. I was-I am so scared. What if she hates me? What if you hate me? I don’t know how to be anything but my job.”
Clarke clicked her tongue and wiped the tears from Lexa’s cheeks. “That’s not true. You know how to be a good wife - a good friend - a good sister. You’re so amazing, Lexa. You’d be an amazing mom. I know you will be.”
Lexa snuffed, wiped her eyes and held her wife’s gaze. “I promise I’ll be around more. For Madi, and for you. For us.”
Clarke smiled and nodded. “I know, Lex.”
The orderly from before knocked gently on the door. “Mrs & Mrs Griffin-Woods, I was wondering if you guys would like to meet your daughter?”
“Please,” Clarke cooed, perking up immediately. She winced when she tried to sit up too quickly, and Lexa did all she could to not flinch sympathetically.
The orderly wheeled over the incubator with the tiny baby inside. There were tubes that seemed too large to be attached to her, but the nurse told them that everything was okay, and she was encouraged for skin to skin contact.
Clarke asked questions while Lexa lifted the lid to the tiny incubator, and picked up the tiny infant. Madi’s face scrunched unhappily at the cold air.
“Happy birthday, baby,” Lexa whispered. Madi only calmed when Lexa held her against her chest, soothing the tiny girl as the nurse helped Clarke remove her gown.
Overcome with emotion, Lexa focused on her daughter, the tiny toes, the tiny fingers, the feel of her little puffs of air. “I love you so much, Madi Griffin-Woods. You’re so special to me and your mommy. You own my heart, baby girl, you know that? I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you.”
Once Clarke was situated against the pillows, Lexa slowly settled Madi against her bare chest and climbed into the tiny hospital bed beside her wife. She wrapped her arms around Clarke as best she could, and together they held their daughter.
Anya was right. Lexa never let anything come before her family ever again, and they lived happily ever after.
