#cm write

[cm-lily]

“. . . We'll be taking Grian with us.”

And just like that, Jimmy remembers knowing someone named Grian.

The memory resurfaced slowly, like a crack on a dam. The longer he walked on the ruins of what was once “Spawn Area”, the bigger the rift is. Grian is their friend, Grian is their admin. Or was their admin. Grian is taken by the watcher, and, Jimmy... Doesn't know what to make of that.

He knows he should be sad, that was their friends who was taken by these beings! But everything is so foggy, Jimmy couldn't think past that fog. He's just numbly walking and looping back to the same place. (That confusion where Grian's face is blurry... He struggles to hold it, like water cupped on his palm. Every image distorted.)

He found a journal. It belong to Grian, obvious by the name of writer in every page. Jimmy doesn't know why it's in his backpack. He didn't remember picking it up, hell, he didn't ventured that deep to the Grian Empire when the rest of Evolutionist is paying their respect to Grian. The Journal changed than what he remembered, the small evo logo was reshaped as a spiral.

The content is normal, the journal was mostly used to keep track of his building idea. There's reference of people he doesn't know. Even though it felt like intruding a privacy of his supposedly good friend, Jimmy need to know. Maybe knowing about Grian can lift the veil... To whatever mist of mystery that been keeping him all night and paranoid.

He found the two last page. The other looks like an ink was spilled over it, and then the paper was hastily scribbled. Jimmy knows it shouldn't be the two last pages, there's a hint of someone ripping a few pages off. But that's not where his mind focused at. (If he were more calm he would've notice and recognize his brain's attempt to remember something, someone. Aside from Grian who's also went missing, who everyone forgot their existence.)

And scribbled on the last page of the journal, the day before their big fight with the Ender dragon, is a word hastily written over and over again. That Jimmy feared the ink could bleed from the paper.

THEY ATE HIM

THEY ATE HIM

THEY ATE HIM

THEY ATE HIM

THEY ATE HIM

[cm-lily]

The sun is alone, Grian is alone. But he keeps on shining, yet it doesn't matter when there isn't anyone who appreciates your light, is it? (Connection. That's what he wants, a part of him that's still human and not entirely made of Celestial body that is a solitary being.)

But then, his lights also brings lots of people closer, too close. When people compliment his presence, they always fly too close, too close that he burns them. And it never fails, every single time.

Too close that he burns their wings, shattered their trust. And they fall to their demise.

[cm-lily]

“I have something for you.”

“Oh, is this… Poppy flower?”

“Yes… I thought you like poppies? Do you not like it?”

“Oh I do! The flowers are nice, I really like it. It's just…” He sigh. “It just remind me of something.”

“Sorry….”

“It's fine, you didn't know. It's in the past anyway,” He assures, slipping the delicate flower between his ear. “I've grown to like it back.”

The person smiles, jagged teeth distorting his scarred face. “I see, I'm glad.”

[cm-lily]

It might be strange for a boy to be named Abigail.

But back then, upon arriving at the orphanage, Abigail is nothing but a filthy, quiet kid. Aimlessly wandering around the orphanage until a nun take pities on him and decide to take him under her wing. He never spoke, never did things unless he was guided to. Eyes that didn't spark a hint of life in them, that always seems unfocused.

Children avoid him a lot, naturally. In this small village, people still believes in ghost and bad spirit.

The only time he ever reacted is when he heard the name Abigail.

No one knows why. Abigail probably wouldn't remember. But like a clockwork, he spring back to life when people called him Abigail.

“Abigail can you bring this for me?”

“Abigail let's play!”

“Abigail you count to ten, and we'll start hiding.”

Abigail. Abigail. Abigail.

Maybe there's something familiar in that name.

Maybe it's a memory Abigail refused to remember for whatever reason.

But he knows the name Abigail is important. To him, or to someone else.

So he respond, and he spoke, and he play, and he lived. He lived because someone he cares about could never does.

[cm-lily]

There he is.

And there they are again.

It sees him in every reflection, through mirror, through one's eye. No matter how much It changed, ripped the old skin and changed into a new form, It. Was. Never. Enough.

He will always be there, a shadow. A ghost of the past. Only lingers because someone... She remembers. And she knows It failed to be him.

If only she can disappear.

———

A small part that used to be Robin tugged him in the back of his mind.

No, not him, It.

Robin never likes the intrusive thoughts, never liked the thought of hurting her.

Michael wished It could tear him out and stop this lump of emotions.

Maybe that way It will become perfect like Its design.