little note: omg we’re coming close to the end! i think there’s gonna be 3 more parts. i’m sorry if this one feels very small, but i’m saving the best for the end!
☁︎·̩͙✧
Time was running out for Demetria and Selah, and both females were growing increasingly desperate about it. Specially the one with the awful marriage arrangement putting the robe tightly on her neck.
The company of Elliot, as incredible as it might sound, had been live-saving for her. For almost a week, the male had done everything he could to stay in the Spring Court with her. The familiarity of the company the only reassurance she had.
Until it was in inevitable for him to leave, and now, she found herself all alone again.
“Never.”
Well, not so alone.
Nyx had been in her head day and night. Quite literally. He took every opportunity he could to send images of home through with his daementi powers. Saying small sentences, sometimes even only a word, to remind her that she, in fact, was not, and never would be alone. To remind her of the people that were waiting for her back home. Remind her that she had now a mate to come back to, a mate that was waiting for her right now, that had been waiting for her all her life. A mate that had always been right beside her, even if they had tried to get away from each other every time they could.
Funny, how they’d always tried to keep each other apart. Now distance hurt, more than anything.
✧₊˚.
Nyx was losing his mind.
He remembered a time when he was a little kid when Demetria, pissed because he had played her a prank, broke his favorite toy, which had been a very special gift from his uncle Azriel. He had been so angry he started chasing her with a blast of fire until their mothers intervened and grounded them both. He thought he would never want to chase someone with a blast of fire as much as he had wanted with her back then, as stupid and childish as it sounded, but he had been wrong. Very, very wrong. He now wanted to chase Abraxas with a blast of fire and stomp on his ashes more than anything he had ever wanted.
He was in desperate need of a distraction, something to take his mind off of how much he missed Demetria’s touch, and how primarily angry it made him to think that Abraxas now believed himself owner of her touch, owner of her.
For the first time in days, Nyx gathered the willpower to get out of his room, and while he went down the stairs, hushed whispers called his attention.
He couldn’t make what was being said behind his father’s studio doors, but he did recognized the desperate sigh of frustration of his little sister, and immediately turned the knob without knocking first.
“Is everything alright?” His surprise only intensified when he saw his parents and sister reunited around the table with nervous faces.
He gave a step into the room, and immediately noticed the way his mother slightly tensed.
“Son, we should go out for a fly, it’s been a long time since we’ve done so together,” his father tried to put the most convincing smile he could, but Nyx was not buying the attempt of distraction, on the contrary, it made him even more curious.
“What are you all trying to hide?”
“Nyx, baby, we didn’t want to hide anything from you,” Feyre gave a step towards her son, allowing him to have a look at the oak table and the four envelopes in it.
High Lady Feyre. High Lord Rhysand. Nyx. Asterin.
“What’s that?” Quickly enough, Nyx was able to grab the envelope with his name before anyone could stop him, and opened it with a growing bad feeling on his chest.
It was a fucking wedding invitation. Demetria’s fucking wedding invitation.
“Nyx…” he heard his mother’s distant voice, but couldn’t seem to react to the worry in it.
“Son,” when Rhysand came closer and put a hand on Nyx’s shoulder, the young male realized he was wrapped in angry clouds of darkness, night poured from him like something threatening to swallow him whole.
The parchment in his hands was nothing but a crumble in his fist, his heart was racing so fast he knew his family could hear it, Nyx was trying hard to breath deeply, but he just couldn’t.
“Nyx…” a soft, soothing voice entered his mind, waking up some reason in him. “Nyx…” Demetria called for him again.
In his anger, he hadn’t realized that Demetria could probably feel his outburst of emotions through the bond, as weak as it still was, since she hadn’t yet accepted it officially, they knew they were connected, they had always been, somehow.
Her voice, the picture of her gorgeous eyes on his mind, and the ghost of the feeling of her hands caressing his cheek brought him finally back.
The darkness around him scattered away, and his face composed again as he stared at his parents worried eyes.
“If you don’t mind, dad, I would like to go on that flight by myself,” Nyx managed to speak in a calm voice.
Rhysand said nothing, only nodded with understanding to his son and took his mate’s hand to keep her from stoping Nyx from storming out of the studio.
Feyre might not understand fully how her son was feeling, but Rhys did. He sighed heavily ones the door was closed, remembering how darkness had too swallowed him centuries ago when his own mate was about to get married to another man.
With one look, he reminded that to his High Lady, and Feyre too sighed in understanding.
✧₊˚.
Nyx had needed to get away from everything to clear his mind, so naturally he found himself flying towards the cliff where Demetria last saved him from stupidity.
Only to find the terribly unpleasant surprise of his cousin Elliot waiting there. How the fuck had he gotten there in the first place?
“Thank the Mother, my ass was beginning to feel numb waiting for you here,” the snowflakes in the male’s brown shoulder-length hair fell as he stood up from a rock, gritting his teeth because of the cold.
“And why on earth would you be waiting for me? Here, specifically?” Nyx crossed his arms, lifting a dark eyebrow with hidden annoyance.
“Because Dem told me to. She said you would come up here once you found out about the invitations, and, unsurprisingly, she was right.”
Hearing Demetria’s name made his heart beat a little faster, and a tickling sensation to rise up in his body. Nyx uncrossed his arms and gave a step closer to his cousin, his face stern and demanding.
“Explain.”
“Yeah, see, I don’t do well under pressure, so you’ll have to change all that soon-to-be-lord-of-darkness-and-death tone. Because it makes me very nervous,” with a swift movement of his hand, Elliot brushed his hair passed his shoulder, while Nyx had to really, really clench his jaw in search of some patience.
“Elliot…” his cousin’s name came out like a warning with clenched teeth.
Nyx was not usually of the angry type to lose his patience in an explosive way, his sister usually was in charge of that, while he was most collected and calm and preferred to treat everything in life as a joke and nothing really seriously. But those past few weeks had altered him completely, and anger was now the only thing he seemed to be feeling.
“Yeah, ok,” the youngest of the males rolled his eyes and gave a big sigh, his russet eyes turning a little bit more serious than Nyx would’ve wanted. “Dem said you’ll be here, she sent me to wait for you because she knew you were going to lose it, and by the looks of it, cousin, you are losing it.”
“Go to the point, Elliot,” Nyx was having trouble not to clench his jaw, but kept it in him as best as he could.
“She has a plan.”
Now those were some words that distracted the anger.
“What?” He uncrossed his arms and blinked several times, a racing adrenaline feeling starting to kick in.
“She has a plan. A really good one for that matter. And she needs your help.”
Nyx took a deep breath in, chin lifting up while his heart felt as if it was about to burst out of his chest.
“You look…beautiful, dear,” her mother forced a smile while fixing up her hair, but Demetria said nothing.
She knew her mother was doing all this in hopes she would take information out of her, in hopes to understand why was she taking this decision, why, even tho she hadn’t slept in weeks, her eyes looked dull and her skin much paler than normal, she still decided to marry the male responsible for it.
Demetria looked at herself in the mirror. She did not looked beautiful, she looked dead. Emotionless. She didn’t just looked like it, she felt like it as well.
Everything had turned dull with the passing of the days, from the aching pain in her chest at the absence of something she still didn’t understand, to the tiredness that consumed her day and night.
She stared at the flowers in her head and felt a tremendous urge to tear them up and destroy them, to trample them underfoot, to get rid of them and their stupid bright colours. She wanted to take off her clothes, the ones that had been made for her in a combination of Spring and Winter styles, and burn them to ashes. She hated them, hated their colours, their layers and their meaning. Yet Demetria only stood up from her vanity and walked over to where her shoes waited.
Viviane watched her daughter with pain in her eyes, she wished then she could ask Feyre to read her mind, to tell her what was wrong with her sweet girl, but she wouldn’t, she knew Demetria wouldn’t forgive the invasion in her mind. But still, she was a desperate mother, and everyday she saw her daughter crumble a little bit more, she got more and more desperate.
“Demetria, my beautiful snow flake, please, I’m begging you to tell me what’s wrong,” she approached her white haired daughter.
When Demetria raised her head and saw the tears gleaming in her mother’s beautiful eyes, she wanted to scream and hug her. But she had only empty words to respond with.
“Would you trust me when I say that I’m doing this for a reason?”
“And is that reason enough to make you look so miserable?”
Now that made her tear up. It was, it really was, but still, she felt so…lonely.
Demetria swallowed her tears up and nodded. Not capable of answering out loud, as she knew she would break down if she did so.
“Oh, my brave girl,” Viviane approached her daughter, and without Demetria expecting it, her mother embraced her in a hug.
Her heart crashed against her aching chest with the force of a thousand unspoken words. She didn’t dare move, afraid she would break down if she did so.
“Just don’t shut us completely down, your father is stressed to death, and your brother…” Viviane pulled away enough to cup her face in her hands, and Demetria had to swallow her tears. “Your brother misses you, he’s your twin, he feels your distress.”
“I don’t want to get him involved, not for now, at least.”
“Then get me involved,” that voice she hadn’t heard in a month made all her hair stand on end and her eyes to shot towards the door, opened with shock and confusion.
“Darling?” Viviane took her daughters chin in her fingers to turn her towards her, looking confused by her sudden change.
“I’m here, and I’m not leaving until I speak with you.”
Her heart pounded in her chest so hard she thought she was having a heart attack.
Her mother furrowed her eyebrows, waiting for a response that Demetria wasn’t able to deliver at the moment.
“Now, Demetria.”
She swallowed hard and looked back at the door. Her mother sighed, and when Demetria turned to look at her, she saw how the female smiled slightly.
“Go, he’s most definitely not leaving without having a word.”
“How…?”
“Please, you really thought Feyre and I didn’t already know? I’m your mother, my beautiful snow flake. Now go, go,” Viviane pushed her daughter towards the door slightly, giving Demetria no chance but to walk out of her room.
She followed the tug of energy that somehow told her exactly where Nyx was. She didn’t knew how, but…she just knew. Knew what path to follow, knew how many steps to take. Just knew how to find him.
The beating of her heart became so irregular as she reached the terrace on the east side of the place she could perfectly hear it in her ears and feel it pounding in her throat as she opened the windows, the night blending with overwhelming perfection with the male standing outside. His wings where spread like two great impotent shadows. Demetria noticed, there, that the stars seemed to shine more brightly in his presence, that his face was hard and molded into an expression of what appeared to be rage and helplessness and relief and...she really had no idea what else, she could never read Nyx's expressions completely. Funny, for someone who could read a person's soul with a look.
“What are you doing here?” Nyx smiled with bittersweet, putting his hands in his pockets.
“Not even a hello? Now that’s rude, sweetheart,” even tho his mocking smirk was on place, it didn’t reach his eyes.
“Cut the bullshit. What. Are. You. Doing. Here,” Demetria approached with her arms folded, she barely could tolerate looking at her family, but looking at him now…she truly felt like a snow mountain a touch away from crumbling.
“I told you, I want to talk to you,” the fake smirk immediately vanished as if it had never been there from Nyx’s face, and only pure, forced calmness to cover up exploding emotions remained.
“I don’t have time for this, Nyx, I need to go,” she turned around, ready to leave her heart in that balcony while her sanity was still intact.
“Where? To your engagement party?” Demetria stoped dead in her tracks.
Obviously he should’ve known by now, but still…something so unpleasant it made her want to throw up twisted in her stomach.
“You’re not seriously planning on marrying him, are you?” The disbelief in his voice made Demetria scoff and finally turn around to face him.
When had he gotten so close?
She swallowed the beats of her own treacherous heart and looked at him with the same disbelief he was looking at her. He paused for a second, finally acknowledging her clothing, and Demetria could only say he looked positively ten times more enraged and even disgusted by the way both Winter and Spring styles didn’t match each other at all. And she hated she felt the exact same way about it.
“Maybe I am, so what.”
“Oh, like fucking hell you are,” she had never, in the whole century she’d been knowing him, seen him so enraged like he was looking right now.
That just made her more angry, that just made her want to explode harder.
“What? Now you’re going to tell me who am I to marry and who am I to not?”
“Yes, exactly.”
Demetria scoffed again, looking at him as if waiting the signal that this was a joke, but it wasn’t, not with the male looking so exasperated as he did.
Now she was fucking pissed too.
“Oh, fuck you Nyx, fuck you!” She tried to get away, but he didn’t allow it as he grabbed her by her arms and made them both turn around so she’ll be trapped between the stone railing and him.
They looked at each other with such an intense rage and almost snapping gritted teeth that the heat running through her body at the proximity of his was just as ridiculous at the erratic pounding of their hearts. Because Demetria could hear his, too, and she was sure he heard hers as well.
“You can curse me all you want, sweetheart, but you’re still not going to marry that piece of shit.”
“Why not? Huh? As if you fucking cared!” She trashed against his grip, but he only held her harder and closer.
“I do fucking care! I do! And because maybe you haven’t grasped it yet, or maybe you’re just ignoring it, but this?” He looked between the two of them. “We?”
Demetria’s mouth fell so dry she almost gasped, but she couldn’t allow it, she couldn’t allow him to come any closer, she couldn’t allow this to go any further.
“There’s no we, Nyx.”
“There is a we! There has always been a we! Do not pretend otherwise, for fucking Mother’s sake, Demetria!”
She had no other words left in her to fight, she wasn’t even sure there was any desire left to fight at all, but yet she snarled at him, with all the anger she had been accumulating the last couple of weeks, with all the impotence she had been feeling and all the despair she couldn’t contain anymore.
“I hate you, Nyx Archeron! I fucking hate you!”
“Dem…” He soften his grip enough for her to free herself and start punching his chest, tears finally falling down her cheeks.
“I. Hate. You!” She emphasized every word with a punch in his chest.
But he did not move, he stayed there, allowing her to burst all her emotions in a fist of rage and tears.
“Dem…”
“Fuck you and your ‘let’s do nothing, together’,” one angry, desolated punch. “Fuck you and your ‘sweetheart’ nonsense,” and another. “Fuck you and your ‘that’s my girl’ bullshit,” and another. “Fuck you and your unspoken words,” and another. “And fuck you for leaving me when I needed you!”
“Well then fuck you as well!” He snapped, his night-sky blue eyes full of a fire she knew all too well, the same fire burning in her chest, the same fire making her skin hot, the same fire holding their rage together. “Fuck you and your stupid believe that you have to do everything on your own. Fuck you and your need to control everything around you. Fuck you and that stupid dress you’re wearing because it’s nothing like you, and it makes me so fucking mad to think you’re wearing it for him. Fuck you and the way you make me so incredibly confused I cannot sleep because I cannot stop thinking about you. Fuck you and the way you make my heart feel like a useless little thing when it seems to not be able to contain itself around you,” he got so close to her she had to grip the railing so hard her hands began to hurt with the rough stone. “And fuck you, Demetria, because I cannot believe that in all the people in this Mother damned world, the Cauldron made me fall so stupidly and irrevocably in love with you, only to then break my fucking heart making you my mate too.”
He was so angry yet so…desperately hopeful it made Demetria held her breath. The tears were now falling silently, but she did not react to that word. Mate. She had already known it. Deep down, she had already felt it.
Nyx Archeron, the reckless, stupid, oh-so-charming Night Prince was her mate.
“No, no you don’t,” he held onto her hand harder, refusing to let her go.
“I need to do this, please,” her eyes filled with tears, forcing against his desperate grip.
“Then let me help you.”
“You want to help? Fine, then I need you to trust me.”
“I do, more than anyone in this world,” he exclaimed with exasperation.
“Then let. me. go,” as much as she tried to not let her voice break, it was inevitable at the end of her sentence.
“Fine, go. But I want you to hear me out very well. I will not let you carry all of the burden on your own, I will not let you fall, I will be there when you need me to catch you, even if you drive me away, even if you scream at me to go, I will. not. leave. you,” then, without being able to stop it, a single tear fell down her cheek.
“Promise?” Her voice was a whisper, and his white grin flashed alongside the night sky stars, doing its best attempt to hide the pain in his eyes.
“Promise.”
Demetria awoke with the absence of something so heavy in her chest she had to clutch it in her hands. Her dreams had taken her back to seven moons ago, as it had done for all that week since her arrival at the Spring Court. A consolation or a punishment, she had not yet decided which one it was.
Three soft knocks on the door made her sigh and close her eyes for a second to brace herself. She muttered a “come in”, and did not looked up as the maids flooded her room for yet another awful morning.
They dressed her up in Spring Court style, with an olive green loosed dress that fell with layers of movement to the floor, uncovered shoulders, and white flowers adorning the fabric of the corset.
It was pretty, yet it was not her.
When her hair was being tied on a braid, two more knocks on the door made Demetria stop disassociating and look at the newcomer.
Selah stood at her door with an impeccable posture.
As soon as the maids saw their princess, they curtsied and left the room to both females, when the door was closed, Selah sighed and relaxed her shoulders a bit, coming closer to the vanity where Demetria sat.
“You look awfully tired,” the blonde female said.
“Well, that’s maybe because I am awfully tired,” Demetria sighed, finally being able to show the absolute misery she was in with only Selah present.
“My family tends to have that endearing effect,” the female sighed while falling tiredly down on Demetria’s bed.
Since her arrival to the Spring Court, Demetria and Selah had found relief in each others confidence. Selah had never had a friend before, someone to trust in, not that they were exactly friends yet, but they were getting somewhere. And Demetria felt so utterly desperate all the time that it felt nice to be able to have that small talk, fractions of time where she could let herself look as exhausted as she felt when she was only with Selah, since she had nothing to hide to the Spring Court Princess.
“Please tell me they’re coming today, I cannot have another day listening to the priestesses suggestions for wedding dresses, those things are awful and I cannot even breath in them.”
The blonde female laughed slightly, and Demetria grunted her discomfort.
“They do look awful, I must say,” Demetria rolled her eyes, and Selah ceased her amusement and changed her expression into one more serious. “But don’t worry, they are.”
Something in Demetria’s chest tightened. Abraxas’ evil buddies were coming today to go on a “hunting trip”, and Demetria and Selah needed to use this visit to their advantage to be able to learn everything they could about what they were planning for the Winter and Night Court.
Three soft knocks in the door made both females stand tall and their hearts to race faster. When Demetria gave the call, a maid entered the room.
“Apologies for the interruption, my Ladies, but there’s a male looking for you, Lady Demetria,” both female’s relaxed their tension then, but Demetria frowned deeply in confusion.
Could it be…
No, no it couldn’t, he wasn’t that stupid, or maybe he was…but she had asked him to give her some time, to let her do what she had to do, to wait for her signal…but then again, when had Nyx Archeron done what she said?
Never in a 100 years. Literally.
Demetria swallowed hard and forced a smile, looking sideways and Selah before gracefully rushing out of her bedchamber and walking downstairs towards the courtyard of the Manor, her heart racing so fast and so hard she was afraid everyone in that house could hear it.
Once there, she stoped for a moment before taking a look at the male waiting for her, to steady herself, to get ready, to…
“There you are, it’s been some time since I saw those awfully bad hidden baggy eyes,” her heart gave both a leap of relieve and one of slight disappointment when Elliot’s neck-long wavy chestnut hair walked towards her.
Demetria smiled —truly smiled—, for the first time in days, and quickly ran to throw her arms around the male’s neck.
She drank in his sweet vanilla smell and sank into the relief of his familiar hug. An overwhelming feeling settling on her heart as he sighed in relief while tightening the embrace a little more.
“What are you doing here?” She pulled away from the hug to look the male in the eye, still not believing herself.
“Well, the oficial excuse is that, as emissary-in-training, father sent me to watch and learn some political matters.”
“And the unofficial?” Elliot sighed, pulling her towards him again.
“I needed to give you a hug and some moral support, and,” he pulled away from her again and smacked her arm.
“Auch! What was that for?” Demetria complained, rubbing the spot that had been hit.
“I needed to punch you for not telling me anything, and for whatever batshit crazy plan you have going on,” he looked around with a frown. Luckily, they were alone for the moment.
“There’s no plan,” the blatant lie was so bad she smacked herself mentally for it.
“Dem, honey, I know I might be clueless sometimes, but I’m not that clueless.”
She sighed, looking away from his russet eyes and backing just a little step, putting up her walls.
“You should go,” her voice was a rough whisper that betrayed all her efforts to appear ok.
Elliot sighed and lowered his head for a moment, when he raised it again, Demetria saw a seriousness in his eyes she had never seen before in the male.
“You know, I’ve visited your brother and my cousins these days, to see if anyone could answer me what, in the name of the Mother, was going on with you, but you know what I founded instead,” Demetria didn’t wanted to know the answer to that, she really, really didn’t wanted to, but Elliot was going to say it anyway, so she swallowed hard and lifted her chin ever so slightly. “Your brother is completely destroyed, he’s beyond pissed, I’ve never seen Blaze like this before, he always pushes me away, as you well know, but for the first time he sat with me and opened his heart; he misses you greatly, and he feels awfully bad not knowing what to do to help you,” tears had already started falling from her eyes without Demetria even noticing, but she knew exactly just how heartbroken Blaze was feeling right now, she felt it as well, with the unique connection they had as twins. “And my cousins…I couldn’t even see Nyx, Asterin told me he hadn’t come out of his room, that nobody has been able to approach him without the possibility of getting their heads bitten off. Asterin herself feels sad, worried beyond words, so does Kardam, all of us do, really, my sisters, the little ones, Mother, even Darya is concerned,” now Demetria couldn’t even look at him in the eye, as well as she could not hold back the little sob that escaped her. “Dem, we all love you, you are our family, and this family does not turn their backs on each other.”
Demetria did not look up for a long moment, where there was only silence between them. Elliot did not say anything more, and the only ocasional sound was the platinums gasping breathing.
It took her some time to get herself together, and only when tears had stoped falling down her cheeks and she was sure she could talk without her voice breaking did she clean her tears with the back of her hands and looked up at Elliot with a stern face, despite the redness of her eyes and nose and cheeks.
“Then there is something you can help me with.”
✧₊˚.
Demetria was ready to act her part on this whole plan. She was dressed like a dream; a long baby blue dress that hugged her waist perfectly and exposed her collar bone, white and blue flowers adorned her half tied hair, and her lips were painted of a subtle reddish color.
She was standing over the railing in the terrace, looking at the horizon, her heart beating heavily in her chest with the anticipation, but her exterior kept calm and unmoved.
She was more than ready, she’d been so since the day she met with Selah in the woods of the Winter Court.
“Did not know I would find you here,” the voice she’d been waiting for finally arrived, and while her insides twisted with disgust and anger, she kept her face from reacting to such feelings.
“Felt the necessity of taking some air, it’s quite overwhelming inside,” she turned around to look at Abraxa’s face with an emotionless expression, the male advanced towards her, his blond hair catching the light of the sun.
“Sounds like you’re not having fun here.”
Fucking prick. Of course she wasn’t having fun here, no one who lived with him could ever have fun.
“No, I am not,” Abraxas laughed bitterly and shook his head in disappointment.
Oh, because it was so hard to believe she couldn’t possibly be not even a little bit interested in his charms.
“But I would want to,” that was the part where she had to swallow the gulp of disgust at her own words and make herself sound as honest as she could.
Abraxas looked up at her again, this time with a wariness that did not hide itself from Demetria’s attention.
“You would?” He definitely didn’t believe her, so she had to level up her acting a little bit more.
“I would. I’m tired of feeling tired, sad, alone. I’ve accepted this is the fate I shall have, I just…I would want to make it a little bit less awful,” she lowered her eyes for a more innocent look, and it seemed to work perfectly as Demetria noticed how the male’s shoulders and face started to relax a little.
“I would, too. You know, Demetria, as bad as you believe me to be, I have only ever wanted to have the chance to make you happy, to have you by my side, if you accept this marriage, I know I can, and you’ll be a great Lady of this Court,” his chest flared with pride for his own words.
Lady. Not General, not even High Lady. Only a Lady. A puppet, a pawn, an adornment for him to brag about.
Demetria had to swallow her disgust and her fury again, and instead forced a tight lipped smile without being able to look at him for a moment, if she did, she might puke on him.
“Then we should start again, don’t you think?” She finally got herself to look at him, and saw as Abraxas’ smile extended with egocentricity and achievement, making her want to punch it off his stupid face.
“I do. And I’m glad you have finally come to your senses, Demetria.”
The only thing she had come to is to the conclusion that Abraxas repulsed her more than she had thought, and that now, more than ever, she was ready to throw herself into the wolf’s den for the sake of her family. And she woul rip that wolf’s head off when the right time came.
